Today, I tossed half a sausage to a dog sitting beside a park bench. It wasn't until he lunged for it and dragged the man beside him off of the bench that I realized it was a seeing eye dog. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my dog to the dog park and let him off the leash for a bit. He ran straight towards a group of people having a picnic, jumped on their blanket, and devoured half of their food before I could catch him. They were surprisingly forgiving, but I had to buy them lunch to make up for it. FML
Today, a dog came into my yard. I bent down to pet him, forgetting I had a burger in my hand. The dog grabbed it and ran. FML
Today, I was having a conversation with a friend at the park when my dog ran up to me with something in his mouth. I thought it was a stick. I bent down to take it, only to realize it was a dead squirrel. My dog just stared at me, tongue lolling, like, “It’s a stick, throw it.” FML
Today, my cousin and I were out on the boardwalk. I walked to the railing next to a man and said, "Great view isn't it?" Then I found out that the man was blind and had a seeing eye dog. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park, and he ran straight into a group of people having a picnic. Naturally, he grabbed the biggest piece of meat in sight and ran off with it. As I chased him, I tripped and fell in front of everyone. My dog then sat and chewed the meat in front of me. FML
Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. While chatting with another dog owner, my dog managed to steal their sandwich and ran off with it. I had to chase my sandwich-thieving dog through the entire park. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
Today, I realized that my dog is an evil genius. As I sat down to have a snack, he barked as if he saw someone outside. I went to check it out, but nobody was there. When I returned, I found my dog on the table finishing off my bacon sandwich. FML
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Top comments
ozpunker 20
I bet the owner didn't see that coming.
cocacola999 27
A proper seeing eye dog should actually never accept treats from strangers.
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Comments (114)
ozpunker 20
I bet the owner didn't see that coming.
gracehi 33
Am I going to hell for laughing at that comment?
coldkilla70 9
Well played
mikaelkarlsson 13
too good
sugarshane007 20
Even without the sunglasses, I still pictured Horatio Caine, followed by Roger Daltry screaming "YEEEEAAAAHH!" at the end of this comment.
whY402Jay 12
Comment of the century.
upallnight11 19
Spot on!
viper8608 9
bah dum tssk
DanielleinDC 34
Probably, but then we all are. And not all blind people wear sunglasses. I've met a number of blind people in my life, and none of them wore sunglasses regularly. And that dog clearly was poorly trained, as he should not have lunged for the food.
BRLHP 24
These replies are horrible. Aside from #1, #72, and #77.
tjv3 10
Wow I thought seeing eye dogs were trained not to react to stuff like that
cocacola999 27
A proper seeing eye dog should actually never accept treats from strangers.
tika12991 15
Yes! This! Exactly what I was thinking! This dog was obviously not very well trained.
whY402Jay 12
So the dog was a waste of money.
AKGirlinSD 20
Thank you, #2. I dated a guy who had a dog for the guy being deaf and mute. The dog always wore a bright orange vest that held his license as a dog for a person who is disabled (as well as a large "disabled" written across the entire vest on the back) , everywhere we took him. Most people knew not to pet him or give him attention. I always felt badly when a young kid would come running up to the dog and wanted to pet him. I'd have to explain to the kid that he was a special kind of dog that couldn't be touched by anyone but the owner. Half of the parents would apologize for their kids, the other half would give me the look of death.
taranpreet 7
Maybe the owner hadn't fed him in a while so he already had food on the brain and forgot his training lol
AndOtherDrugs 5
Some of the most disciplined dogs make mistakes sometimes and often need reminding of their training. They're still going to obey some of their natural instincts, which I personally think is healthy for the animals' well-being. Even so, we can't assume the owner trained his dog properly and the dog was just being unruly. I've seen service dogs walk their owners repeatedly into doors, bushes, and bicycles while the owners do nothing about it.
WillTay 8
Giving you the death stare for not letting children pet a guide dog, that's just appallingly rude
RedPillSucks 33
@51 I didn't think the owners trained the dog, but that they were trained by some reputable organization. I'm not sure that the owners would necessarily know what to do if the dog "forgot" their training
TimeDisposalEngi 14
I worked at a bakery and a seeing-eye dog once pulled a whole row of croissants off of the rack I was wheeling out. I felt bad for the dog because I exclaimed "hey!" and then had to explain to the owner what happened, who then proceeded to hit the dog :(
Bubbelz 25
Exactly. How would an i.e. blind person train a dog :/
AKGirlinSD 20
Thank you, #56. I really wanted to say, "Have your parent explain why helping dogs can't be petted," but I never did. Now I get pity stares for the lines hanging out of my chest plate. I just call the magic tubes if a kid asks me what they are. I mention this because parents should explain to their children what is okay to do, ask, or say to a stranger.
MikaykayUnicorn 36
Even still, you should NEVER feed a ******* dog that isn't yours. Especially since dogs are just like humans in the fact that they can have diet restrictions and allergies.
XtinaBoomGirl 5
You deserve it, you shouldn't give other people's animals food without asking permission first!
Ameel_fml 19
This x100. My dog has to be on a very strict diet for health reasons, and I hate taking her for walks because my house in near some diners so the customers sometimes throw food to her. People should ask before feeding random dogs. It's rude, and in some cases, dangerous for the dog. :(
Sputnikspak 13
My dog has a nasty wheat allergy, if he so much as eats a macaroni noodle he chews half the fur off of his paws from itching. Guess whose neighbours like to leave bread out for the squirrels...
tencentsakiss 19
I wish I could "thumbs up" this comment a thousand times. I don't think there's any mistaking a seeing eye dog for a stray, and you should never even consider giving a strange dog food without their owner's permission!
jkmartinjk 16
What if OP thought the dog was a stray?
Mossears133 15
I couldn't agree more! Many spices are very bad for dogs, and sausage is just FULL of weird human spices! Not to mention the whole "obviously-a-seeing-eye-dog-can-you-not-see-the-vest" thing
Fsvb 32
Maybe the dog didn't have a vest because maybe it wasn't a certified help dog. Because if it was trained properly, it would not take the food from a stranger.
whatwhyhoo 10
Exactly, I don't own a dog but I would never feed or touch a dog without the owners consent. The OP didn't have common sense.
Dracoboxer357 36
Kind heart for animals, Op. Just horrible luck for which ones! Ooops... ;)
wlddog 14
This FML is an awesome visual. I cracked up when I heard it.
Andurrr 3
Nasus OP
laden_swallow09 35
Huh?
Dodgydaly 11
league of legends reference
PeaceIsFree 9
At least your identity remained hidden
EpicSquishii 21
It's not your fault that the dog was improperly trained. Yes, you should always ask before giving treats to another person's animal, but the dog should have been trained never to run off distractedly.
3rdbass 9
No, I'm sure the guy knew OP was an idiot for failing to notice the white cane and harness on the dog.
DasHaas 9
That was either a very bad seeing eye dog, or a very good sausage.
gracehi 33
No! It was both!
Sputnikspak 13
Hot sausage!
greenwich1945 13
Regardless of how the dog was trained, you should always ask permission from the owner before petting a dog or feeding it treats.