Today, at my sister's wedding, I got my 15 month-old son to 'sign' the big guest book. I gave him a pen and was hoping for a cute little squiggle or something. But no, he managed to draw something that looked uncannily like a big swastika. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my son was arrested for tagging a wall with the well known symbol of a certain evil Nazi leader. Not only that, the police showed me a picture of the graffiti and turns out he’s so dumb he couldn’t even draw the symbol properly and gave up after 4 failed attempts. FML
Today, my son told me he got a tattoo to honour our German heritage. The bloody fool got an eagle and swastika on his arm. I had to explain to a 20-year-old what WWII was. He’s now researching laser removal. Idiot. FML
Today, my 18-year-old son got his first tattoo. I would have loved it, if it wasn't a text on his hand with a glaring spelling mistake in it. FML
Today, my son took his very first steps. Unfortunately, it was during my sister's wedding. She had a full-blown bridezilla meltdown over how he "stole her spotlight". FML
Today, my six-year-old son called to say he was suspended from school for drawing some “pretty flowers.” Confused as to why that would warrant punishment, I took a look and they were swastikas. He’s inconsolable. FML
Today, I discovered my 3-year-old daughter's artistic skills. She managed to draw an elaborate mural on our living room wall. The masterpiece? A stick figure family, including our dog, but instead of a tail, he has a second head. She of course used permanent markers. FML
Today, my little brother learned to write his name. How did he tell the family? By writing it in permanent marker all over my 100 year old piano. FML
Today, my brother decided it would be funny to squirt disappearing ink on my wedding dress right before I walked down the aisle. It didn't disappear. FML
Today, my five year-old niece thought that it would be acceptable to carve her artwork all over our toilet seat. FML
Today, I took my two kids to a restaurant with a graffiti-themed wall and took some lovely pictures that I promptly posted to family on social media. I didn't notice until a couple of hours later it said "ANAL?" in huge writing behind my dear child's head. FML
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Top comments
ea247 20
I bet you did-nazi that coming!
daddysgirl243 21
blame it on someone else
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Comments (90)
Yolofrodo 5
Heil baby hitler
sighlifeman 12
Felt like I read this exact fml a few years ago or last year
gatorgirl7563 22
1) Grab color-matching pen. 2) Scribble-swirl pen on paper, beginning where son's swastika lines ended. OR Educate people that, historically, the swastika has been a world-wide symbol of good luck, fertility, and prosperity, which is why Hitler chose the symbol in the first place and so is actually nothing to be ashamed about since no one in your family has any affiliations with Nazi or Neo-Nazi organizations, then wish your sister and brother-in-law well in their new life together.
AN5661618 10
Little Fuhrer!
IAmClay 24
Good thing the original meaning was well intended