Today, my boyfriend's transition into an annoying hipster is complete. It started with the not-really-necessary nerd glasses and the Mötley Crüe t-shirt, the final straw being the affected British accent. I'm considering where to dump the body. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't follow her latest fad of becoming a goth, which involves dressing like an undertaker's haunted hearse and putting on eyeliner. Last week she was into Reggae and beanie hats. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument; however, his new-found passion for hardcore rapping meant that he tried to "diss" me using bad rhymes and ill thought-out putdowns. It was ridiculous, and didn't really make any sense, so I started giggling. He stormed off, grumbling. FML
Today, after weeks of my yelling, my boyfriend finally listened and got a hobby. Instead of getting into something sensible like martial arts, he chose tabletop gaming. Now I have to listen to hours of boring stories about pretend fantasy worlds, and admit to everyone that my boyfriend is a nerd. FML
Today, my boyfriend drunkenly decided to let his friends cut his hair into a mullet. He won't change it. I'm supposed to introduce him to my family. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend his shirt and pants did not match and that he should change for dinner. All my belongings are now on the sidewalk. FML
Today, and since we met, my girlfriend has forced me to change my hair, clothing and jewellery, and my diet. She has changed basically everything about me. Then this morning she dumped me because I'm "not the guy she fell in love with a year ago". I'm not even upset because its too funny. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's family. He calls his parents things like “geriatric hag” and “old clown”. I was about to yell at him, but they started calling him “nancy boy” and “nerd”. Apparently they love each other, but only communicate through abuse. I can’t believe I may soon marry into this mess. FML
Today, I showed my fiancé the darling Tinkerbell hoodie I'd bought myself during the weekend. Instead of liking it as I'd hoped, he told me my childish wardrobe was embarrassing, and he wasn't going to be seen in public with me until I wore something different. FML
Today, I had to have a serious talk with my boyfriend about his Miley Cyrus obsession. FML
Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend because he is tired of everyone giving him shit about my ginger hair. FML
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Top comments
dtbomb 3
I would say do it at that one river but you've probably never heard of it.
kikimonole 13
Oh dear. Another dumbass moron has been created! By that I mean your boyfriend. Ask SIRI! Seriously she (it?) gives you suggestions on where to hide a body.
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Comments (215)
st333ph 12
Hello my darling, would you like a cup of tea?
SciFiFanatic 3
Has anyone ever said you look similar to Vanessa Hudgens? Cause you do; especially her character from High School Musical. Anyways, I know know, has nothing to do with the FML. Oh well.
thats_my_job 11
^ Neither comment had anything to do with the fml anyway so it doesn't really matter.
NayrGuy 0
If you follow reddit you will know that hipsters believe being 100% original.English is orginally spoken with what we know as a British Accent so they speak like that. Fun-Fact; The english language is actually based on A form of German that arose around the 500's.
fyreprincess 3
if I understand the divergence of American English from British English correctly, the standard American English, news caster's accent, is most closely related to the English spoken by the British colonists. around the turn of the 19th century upper class Brits started the affectation of dropping their "r"s. thus we now have what most Americans consider a british accent.
elephantsarecute 16
Actually you're kind of right. Anglo-Saxon, the predecessor of English, was a German dialect spoken by the Germanic settlers of England. Modern English is a mix of Anglo-Saxon and Norman French, blended and changed over time.
agonydrum 7
If you live in a city you could drop him off in the ghetto I'm sure the people there wouldn't appreciate him much and than you don't have to dump the body :)
DinoChicken 3
There's a pretty nice lake by my house you can use! :D
ishanpat 0
Wow, what a Dumb ass
HelpMeJeebus 5
Into a people sized paper shredder. along with the dicks who think that "smells like teen spirit" is the only song Nirvana ever recorded.
kriz_allizwell 6
Put him 'underground' to complete the transformation.
larisonr 4
I'd have done dropped someone at the unnecessary glasses.
agonydrum 7
I'd have done droppeded you the first time I had heard youse speak
larisonr 4
Oh.. Do you wear the unnecessary glasses too?
agonydrum 7
I was mocking the fact that you can't speak English, the fact that you didn't even notice says more than I ever could
Inediblepeaches 15
Kill him. Kill him with fire.
GS67_fml 6
I've heard there's an app for that