Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, I was set up on my first blind date since my divorce. My expectations were low, but when she showed up, she was a smoking hot. She was way out of my league, she was delightful and kind throughout the date, but my low confidence shined through. That night she acquired an expensive dinner and a stalker. Me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered, "Fuck it" and left. FML
Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend, "You're kidding, right?" FML
Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. She seemed really nervous, so I tried negging to loosen her up. She decked me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a coffee shop. I walked up to who I thought was him, smiled, and said, “Hey! You look even cuter in person!” He looked horrified. It wasn’t my date. My actual date witnessed the whole thing and ghosted me mid-latte. FML
Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dashizam 10
So what, it's easily fixed. One flaw is the best you can get! Take it!
priceyfml 7
She could always use dandruff shampoo, good luck :)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (209)
robo_thunder 13
Now you know what to get her for Christmas. Dandruff shampoo.
frecktured 14
You should be glad it wasn't a head full of ticks! Anyway, the thought of a miasma of dandruff irks me.
dashizam 10
Do you mean lice?
lilhellian 27
Does anyone else think of miasma as the stuff that almost killed the archer in Inyuyasha?
DynamicDave 11
I would like to announce that I call dibs on "Miasmic Mist" as a band name.
eur0 14
was it snowing over there
perdix 31
You said she's hot. I'd say "Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!"
priceyfml 7
She's shedding and she knows it
priceyfml 7
For some reason I read that to the tune if sexy and I know it ... I'll go back to my igloo in Saskatchewan
ICastillo 25
It's going to be a white Christmas for OP.
perdix 31
The hot ones are always flaky. In this case, it's literal!
cmb8280 24
Wish I could like this comment more than once lmao
donut_gurl 8
so you're gonna write her off because of dandruff? lame.
Dracoboxer357 36
16- I agree, I'm thinking Op's kinda shallow to write off this beautiful woman who may be very nice and intelligent, simply because of a dry scalp. :p Date her, see if she's fantastic all around before you judge, Op. :p If you can't do that, you don't deserve her anyways. :p
Quiet_one 22
Dandruff is gross, but if it's that bad she's probably pretty self-conscious about it and is most likely already trying to fix it. If that's the worst thing about her, writing her off just for that is extremely shallow.
hentaifreak 2
hey I have dandruff too (not that bad though XD) but the way you're describing her dandruff is kind of exaggerated,
equin0xx 6
Well that's one date you shoul've flaked on.
CaptainSaveAHoe 11
There snow way that he should've flaked! I would have dove right into the date Head and Shoulders first!
equin0xx 6
Well played sir.
Accuraxy 10
Hey at least it is a flaw that can be easily fixed. By the way your username made me laugh:)
DracoSpirita 21
Love your username OP! Totally made my day!