Today, I lifted up my blinds, only for them to detach from the wall, hit me on the head, knock a pile of paper over, spill a can of Pepsi, leave plaster all over the floor and a gaping hole in the wall above my window. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while taking pills for a headache, I threw my head back to help get the pills down, and in the process, whacked it against the brick windowsill behind me. FML
Today, I woke up and the sun was blinding me through my attic window. I have no blinds so I got a poster from my wall and stuck it to the wood on my window with nails. Turns out I have wood rot, and my entire window fell out. FML
Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML
Today, I decided to be productive and clean behind my couch. I found dust, old receipts, and one sock I thought was stolen by the universe. When I stood up proudly, I smashed my head on the shelf above. I knocked down three picture frames. All shattered. FML
Today, when it started raining, I remembered that I'd left my kitchen windows open. I hurried to close them, but slipped in a huge puddle and slid into the wall, making a huge hole in it with my knee. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML
Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML
Today, after sweeping up a spill, I managed to break the cupboard door. With my head. FML
Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML
Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML
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Top comments
MrCalves 1
sounds like a massive clusterf*ck
OwNowBrownCow 0
Should have had a V8 instead.
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Comments (166)
OwNowBrownCow 0
Should have had a V8 instead.
ladykat 0
that^
littlexlion 4
NOT THE PEPSI!!! ...then again, I am a coke person...
fisheatsbear 6
Pepsi!? coke!??!!1 your all dumb, Dr pepper is obviously the only drink for anyone that's sane
fisheatsbear 6
no Dr pepper does. but cokes a close second
Shookitup 0
dr. pepper is the ishh!! ^.^
illmatic2 16
Gatorade and naked juice. Pop is yucky.
sparklestar69 1
naww mountain dew
5t3ff1k4h 47
Never. Cream Soda beats all.
CrosbyBlows 0
Why drink pop? I'd prefer a beer.
sourgirl101 29
I'm a vodka girl but if I drink beer, I love me some Landshark! yummy
ChrissyRawr 0
*sniff sniff snort* ......... 57 is correct Where are all the damn straws?!?!?!
TwoStrikeBadAss 0
13 that picture is wierdingly arrousing me... for some reason
TwoStrikeBadAss 0
36 Im gonna have to say Dr Pepper too but it doesn't taste as good as it used to though so Coke is the runner up
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Newcastle FTW. Real women drink REAL beer, not American mass-brewed bottled piss. Microbrews like Flying Dog Doggy Style don't count, of course.
Virus963 5
sounds like your blinds kicked your ass
DaemonSadi 0
YDI for being Northern xP jk hope you're okay!
Trupe 3
If I spilled a can of pepsi I'd be pissed too
Mack7273 0
haha
lovelikewoe 0
that suuuuucks, lol.
exiie 0
Lol, awe I feel bad for OP
MrHankey0123 0
20th
copycat148 0
fail