Today, I was walking my aunt's dog to the park and I grabbed a few doggy bags to pick up the poop. As it turns out, the bag had a small unnoticeable hole in it, that grew bigger as I fit my hand through it. I ended up using my hand to pick up the poop and didn't realize it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was picking up after my dog with a poo baggie over my hand, like a mitten. Too bad the bottom ripped open and my bare hand poked through it just as I grabbed a big handful of steaming dog turd. FML
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and forgot a bag to pick up his poop, since it's illegal to not pick it up in my town. Right as my dog started to take a dump, a cop car drove by and continued to watch me as I was forced to pick up the poop with my bare hands. FML
Today, I was walking my dog and he stopped to take a crap. While he was doing his business, I saw something white coming out of his butt that just wouldn't budge. He started whimpering and I stepped in to help him. I pulled out an entire plastic bag. FML
Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML
Today, I was out walking my dog. After he took a dump, I went to pick it up but my glasses fell right in his poop. I didn’t have tissue, just the plastic bag. FML
Today, while walking my dog in the darkness, I bent down to pick up his poop. I screamed like a little girl as his morning turd leapt up my arm, covering my hand and jacket sleeve in soggy poop. My dog had curled one out onto a dozing frog. I skipped breakfast. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
Today, I was walking my dogs. I had a doggy bag, and was holding it closed, then breathing in it, so it would blow up. My dogs 'went', so I picked it up and kept walking. As I was heading home, I absent-mindedly started blowing into the bag again. Everything ended up in my mouth and on my face. FML
Today, I heard my dog chewing on something. I called her over, held out my hand, and told her to drop it. She dropped it into my hand, and I was proud of her. That was until I realized it was cat poop. FML
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Top comments
IgniteMe28 0
all aboard the failboat...
ryki_bloom 0
Yuck! Seriously! But - I think that you should have noticed. Plastic bags feel different than poop. YDI for being an idiot.
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Comments (68)
deaditegirl 0
YDI. How did you not feel that? Air feels different on your hand than a plastic bag.
Snackbars 0
Now you're know as the town human pooper scooper! How does that make you feel?
GreenDaysGeekGrl 0
How did you not feel it on your hands?
DerangedFox 0
How could you not feel the difference? And even if you are that oblivious, how did you manage to fully pick up the dog's poo before you figured it out? Still, your whole life isn't f*cked because you got poop on your hand. They make antibacterial soap. It won't even matter tomorrow, let alone the rest of your life.
tpag3r 0
calm down kid, were not here to sympathize for peoples life ruining moments... we're here to laugh at them so laugh and have fun dont yell, its not cool
TurdMonkey 0
yes, listen to tpag3r because he is such a MAN dont get me wrong, i agree with you, but dont call other ppl "kids" it just makes you sound silly
bobby222 0
YDI for poo dipping.
ananamoose 0
poopy hand... haha i would have called you a poopy face but from what i read you didn't realize it was poop in your hand and smash it on your face. so therefore unfortuantely i can only call you poopy hand
i_is_a_tr00l 0
YDI for not having a fish. Ya don't need to clean up fish poop with your hands. :D
bobby222 0
You still have to clean out the tank, dumbass.
Themaineaddict 0
Yeah but you don't need to pick up the fish crap with your hands. You just dump the dirty water and scrub. I think the person knew you had to clean the tank. Dumbass.
TurdMonkey 0
fish are shitty pets
oprah_fml 0
sick nasty. looks like your hands were too full too even notice.
sammii 0
been there. done that.
linf 0
That's why you should use a heavy-duty bag next time! Get it? hahahaha