Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML
Today, I spent several hours downtown with my violent grandma, after she was arrested for threatening a guy with a gun. His crime? "Trespassing" by ringing the doorbell and asking if she was interested in donating to charity. FML
Today, I went to pay my grandma a visit. She called the cops because she didn't recognize me and thought I was a robber. FML
Today, my grandmother is upset I won't lie to the police for her and is now claiming that I'm involved in the Mafia. FML
Today, I woke up to the news that my mom's in jail. FML
Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML
Today, my mom hasn't talked to me for 5 days, so, worried sick, I called my grandpa. She's been in jail, and no one cared to inform me. Great. FML
Today, I came home from work to find my grandmother in my living room, demanding to know where I'd been all day. I'm 22 and live by myself. She stole my mother's emergency key to get in. FML
Today, my grandma was arrested for throwing her cane at a man who she thought was mocking her walk. That man was my boyfriend's father, who limps because of his cerebral palsy. He refuses to drop the assault charges. FML
Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML
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Top comments
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
you should be happy! After all those years of marriage, the spark is still there!
Cads1 24
Sounds like there is a burning issue between them. I wonder what the hot item is.
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Comments (55)
ladyg228 15
Well did you bail her out?
ashleymeshell 15
"That grandpa's on fire... That grandpa's on fiiiirrrrrreeeeee..."
harmtouch16 11
Well bail her out! If she's been married like 40+ years you know she has put up with enough of his shit! But in al seriousness, I hope everyone's ok.
Omniprism 15
This. Is awesome. Though you might check into her mental state.
Tannasgh 22
Ahhh...the joys of oldtimers disease...
Carlitosfmc 18
Elvis would have called it a "burning love"
LadyLuck93 20
Damn something you would see in a movie or something.
ksks1234 33
This FML has made the Iko, Iko song stuck in my head.
classicsparkles 17
When grannies go wild.
cxsuzanne 6
stop with the puns you awful awful minions. i hope your grandpa is okay OP.