Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was with the guy I am seeing and I were fooling around in my room. I asked him if he wanted to have sex. He said he didn't have time because he had to go play Mario Kart. FML
Today, I leaned in to kiss my boyfriend goodnight at the door. He smiled sweetly, cupped my cheek… and then used his other hand to pull the last slice of pizza out of my hand and slam the door shut. FML
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "Eat it, eat it!" FML
Today, I made out with a handsome man in the restroom at a party. There was a knock on the door, interrupting us. It was his girlfriend. FML
Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
Today, I was making out with this guy I had been seeing, and things start to get pretty steamy. As he paused for a second, I thought he was going to get up and find a condom, but instead he turns to me and says, "I think I'm going to go to the library." I wasn't invited. FML
Today, I told my long-distance boyfriend that I'd like to throw my legs over my head and have him cram his dick deep inside me. He told me to order a pizza, "It'd be more fun." FML
Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML
Today, after a great double date with my best friend and two really hot guys, we went back to my place. My friend and I left the guys in the living room to go grab some more wine. When we came back, we found our dates making out with each other on the couch. FML
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Top comments
TheDrifter 24
You silly goose, you gotta tie him down before you dominate him if you don't know whether he's a runner.
seandoc 13
He must've been under some serious pressure. Or he could've just wanted some pizza.
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Comments (98)
aly_pinay22 8
Sorry, maybe he's just not that into you.
Carmstro 13
If he came into his bedroom with her and made out, he's into her, but I'd say he's just not that into meaningless sex at a party. Could have communicated that a bit better though.
phatdaddy62 23
Obviously he wasn't "into her" at all.
cliffibom 15
Bro's before ho's? Couldn't leave them starving
panda_lou 11
Is he a virgin? Just not have a lot of experience? I would suggest going slower if that's the case. If none of the above I'd ask him what his aversion is to sleeping with you. Perhaps he wants to wait longer before taking your relationship there. Or maybe he finds it rude to have sex when the house is full of people. . .
TheMathMajor 26
Exactly, you really should talk to your partner before you have sex to find out each others boundaries, just so no one feels pressured to do something they aren't comfortable with. And you should really do this no matter how experienced or unexperienced your partner is.
Jessj958 19
I was thinking virgin also when I read the post. If that's the case, he was probably just nervous. It's a good idea to talk about these things before they happen so you can hopefully avoid awkward situations.
SuperDanielNL 23
Well some people have other priorities I guess...
SuperDanielNL 23
Some people have other priorities I guess...
micahdunk 13
I guess the way to a guys heart really is food. I never believed it until now.
Catkam623 27
Trust me make me a brownie and I'm yours forever food is very important
bigwiensch 15
I envy that guy for having his priorities in order
perdix 31
So, he'd rather share his sausage with his friends than with you. Red flag!
DaMachk 11
DId you at least get a piece of the pizza?
N_Z_4never 2
probilly has a small dick!
User57777 13
What was that first word? Pro billy?
deadlydecoy17 8
Haha
CharresBarkrey 16
Those who accuse others are usually sufferers themselves.
perdix 31
Guys will small dicks still like to show them off to girls . . . or so I've heard.