Today, I was on a crowded bus on the way back from my boyfriend's when I suddenly had a terrible nose bleed. I had no tissues, so instead I had to use last night's underwear from my bag. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was faced with the inevitable horrible circumstances which lead me to put in a tampon on a moving city bus. FML
Today, after stopping to pick up dinner at a fast food joint, I got a nosebleed. I immediately reached into the bag to grab napkins and began stuffing them up my nose, only to find out too late that a mustard packet had burst in the bag. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus when a large woman with what seemed like the flu came to sit beside me. After snorting hideously for five minutes, she picked up her scarf, blew her nose into it, and dropped it. It fell on my lap. When I stood up to leave the bus, there were streaks of snot on my new skirt. FML
Today, I used the bathroom on a bus from New York to Boston, and carefully covered the seat with twenty of the single-square toilet paper rations. As I was peeing, the bus flew over a bump and swerved sharply, and my entire naked bottom was splashed with urine and poop. It wasn't my own. FML
Today, a car backfired as I waited for my bus and I screamed, thinking I'd been shot. The only thing more humiliating than that was the pissy underwear I had to go back home to change out of. FML
Today, I was on a plane when I suddenly felt the need to use the toilet. I didn't make it in time and I had to spend the remainder of my trip in soiled clothes. FML
Today, a woman who badly needed to change her incontinence pad sat next to me on the bus. I could smell it through my mask. FML
Today, while on a bus, an elderly lady sat next to me sneezed so hard, snot literally went flying. I even offered her a napkin, that she refused. After a brief panic and realizing she had nothing to clean her mess with, she "inconspicuously" wiped her snotty hand on my pants. FML
Today, while getting on a city bus, I sat down on a urine-soaked seat. FML
Today, while I was at work, I didn't have any panty liners so I used tissue. I was taking orders when I suddenly felt the tissue trailing down my leg. I tried not to move, but it inevitably fell through my pants onto the floor in front of my co-workers. I swiftly put it into my pocket. Luckily, it had nothing on it. FML
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Top comments
Fiend_fml 0
Too bad a tampon couldn't save your underwear this time.
acefan18 0
Question is what did you do with last nights underwear last night?
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Comments (66)
ulicksam 0
or you could just clamp your nose closed with your fingers. YDI.
psychokitty1622 0
Well the blood would all go down her throat and she'd soon throw up... (experience)
alwa7sh 2
YDI because you carry extra underwear around in your purse but no napkins
RedPillSucks 33
Yeah. I thought that was strange, but maybe when she said "bag" she meant suitcase and not purse?
alwa7sh 2
If it was a suitcase, then she would have had a lot more options other than last night's underwear. Another option is if she was going commando because her underwear was too disgusting to wear and she ended up putting it up her nose.
jazziness 12
you nothing else in you bag? a shirt couldve worked too
Cass3m0 0
If I saw you pulling out underwear for a nosebleed, I'd instantly give you a napkin or tissue of some sort. D: Those people are assholes.
FMLephant 2
You've bled in your panties before in public before, just not from your face. Congratulations, you've reached a new milestone!
wikkedphuka 0
mileston...skate3
wc2010iwasthere 0
hilarious
ckjacques53198 0
ew stinky
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
OP, you do know that tampons do work even if you stick it up your nose, right? It was made for that reason; stop excessive bleeding from a hole. Chances are, you're probably carrying one since you have a bag/purse big enough to carry your own underwear. Unless you know you're pregnant and/or you forgot, which I highly doubt.
RedPillSucks 33
Hmmm. Not sure which would have looked worse, a tampon stuck in the nose or dirty underwear stuck in the nose.
rottentomatoes 7
best comment ever
maccamcrbja 5
LMAO fail.