Today, I woke up really out of it, and as I was walking into the kitchen, I stubbed my toe on a tile. I sat down, then got up and stubbed the same toe against the table, went over to the kitchen and stubbed the same toe on the same tile again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I hit my toe against a table. Out of frustration, I kicked the table and broke my little toe. FML
Today, I stubbed the same toe three times in fifteen minutes. How? My sister moved most of the furniture in the house to the left by a few inches, because she thought it would be funny to watch me get confused and suffer. FML
Today, as I got up from the couch, my computer, which was next to me, fell on to my pinky toe. It fell just so that the edge of it cut my toe open. I cursed, and hobbled toward the bathroom to get a bandage. As I'm going into the bathroom, I stub said toe on the door jamb. FML
Today, I went to shut the door and ended up banging my toe on my guitar stand; then, as I was getting a snack out of a closet, I banged my toe again on the drawer and now I can't walk. FML
Today, I kicked my coffee table while barefoot, got an X-ray, and I’d cracked the bone. Got home, kicked the exact same table with the exact same toe, got another X-ray, the crack is now a full-on break. What a day. FML
Today, I tried to get a piece of glass out of my big toe. After an hour of poking and prodding, I finally got it out only for it to fall on the floor where I couldn't find it. Not five minutes later, I stepped on it again. FML
Today, I was on autopilot, walking out of the bathroom, and separated my pinky toe from the rest of my toes over the door frame. I dropped to the ground in pain, and my toe and half my foot still hurts hours later. FML
Today, I was walking into my living room when I slipped over the carpet, bashed my head on my glass table, and was moaning in pain on the floor. My parents came running when they heard my head bang… straight to the table, to see if there were any scratches on it. FML
Today, I tried to sneak into the kitchen for a midnight snack. I stubbed my toe so hard on a stool leg, I yelped then tried to keep as quiet as possible. My mom came running, thinking our cat and dog were fighting and hissing again. I hobbled back to bed, only to realize I didn't actually get any food. FML
Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how tough it was there. Then, as I was walking away, I stubbed my toe on the couch, fell and cried. FML
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Top comments
Luke Cann 5
buy slippers
Alexandria79 22
yep. this is how you know you're alive...when you keep stubbing the injured toe.
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Comments (18)
Kurliez408 32
how do you stub your toe on a tile...?
RpiesSPIES 27
Uneven elevation or dragging feet.
Steph Cockburn 13
you stab your toe on a tile of its not sitting right and a bit is sticking up... or if it's the end of the tiles and the other floor is lower
Luke Cann 5
buy slippers
Alexandria79 22
yep. this is how you know you're alive...when you keep stubbing the injured toe.
Tiamarie Zecchino 4
Damn man. That sucks!
Fritterzz 13
Did you call the tow truck?
nzfireman 14
fucken ouch
buduuuu 4
Feel you man.... now stubbing the same toe has become part of my life
PennyLane27 32
Well, if that's not a metaphor for life, I don't know what is!
species4872 20
Once, unfortunate. Twice, Teach you for not looking. Thrice, that's just stupidity.
TheAprilWitch 22
Will you keep doing it tile you break it?
Cali 57
Nice one!