Anonymous
United States
Don't come around here no more
Today, I got banned from my boyfriend's house for being an "insurance liability." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
iliketoastalot
United States
Today, my boyfriend got arrested. For robbing my house. FML
teea
Saint Lucia, Australia
Today, my boyfriend and I cleaned his parents' whole house while they were out, just to be nice. When they came home, they assumed we only did it because we'd made some huge mess that we needed to hide. I'm now banned from their house. FML
Anonymous
Drunk dick
Today, my now ex-boyfriend called the cops on me and told them I wasn’t letting him in the house. His keys were in the door, he was just too drunk to unlock it. FML
whattheHellman
Traralgon, Australia
Secretive
Today, my boyfriend starting going off on me, calling me a psycho, all because I opened our bedroom door while he was in there. FML
shadow
Osceola, United States
Today, my mother-in-law told my fiancé that I had to leave and wasn’t allowed to live there anymore. I own the house. She’s mad because I locked the door so she couldn't walk in anytime she wanted. FML
TasedAndDazed
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Sneaky
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML
Anonymous
Broseley, United Kingdom
Trust
Today, my boyfriend's parents decided that I was untrustworthy and that if they ever saw him with me he'd be heavily punished. They're travelling hundreds of miles just to make sure he stays in the house and doesn't talk to me. FML
avocadotoe
Big Bear Lake, United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML
mysterygurll1234567
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Bye!
Today, I was fired from my job. The reason? My boss didn't feel comfortable paying his son's girlfriend. FML
krisest1988
Columbus, United States
Today, my boyfriend came home from a two week vacation and told me I needed to move out. FML
Top comments
metalmusic 0
Hate to bring this up, but... is your name Bella?
zuuzuu_fml 0
how does that work??
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Comments (85)
Marino01 0
I'm curious to. how does "banned from the house" work?
mpclaw 3
how much do you weigh?
KurouTenshi 0
lucky you that yours is pragtical, I got banned from mine because we're an "abomination of god" :/
pfunk129 1
zuuzuu, you look amazing.
KiwiBlam 4
Holy crap yes!
geordieboysgirl 0
Probably a smoker. When you get homeowner's insurance one of the questions they ask is if anyone who lives in the house smokes. It would be a good excuse if the parents didn't want her around since she likely doesn't actually live there and it really wouldn't be an insurance liability.
gingersnapper 0
Well, did you ban him from your ******/rectum/fatty folds?
Nakedsquirrel 5
Translation: "My boyfriend and/or his family noticed that I tend to do a lot of stupid shit that can result in significant property damage or loss of life, and so my pinhead ass isn't allowed there any more."
skyeyez9 25
Perhaps OP hurt herself and just for an example: she fell off bf's trampoline and broke her arm. OP may have the type of parents that would sue the bf's parents for the injury. So the banned her to prevent further issues.
milobloom 0
Since you haven't elaborated as to why you're an insurance liability.. I'm going to take an educated guess and say you probably deserved it. :)
gotit4cheap 0
they must have caught you on your knees