Today, I was trying to put some new curtains up. I couldn't make sense of the instructions, so I decided to wing it. I spent a frustrating half hour fighting with it, and just seconds after I succeeded, the curtain rod gave way and slammed straight onto my head. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that claimed to be "easy to build in minutes." Four hours and multiple arguments later, I realized I had misread the instructions, and half the parts were upside down. I'm pretty sure the furniture won this round. FML
Today, I tried to use a fancy new hairstyling tool and ended up getting my hair tangled in it. I had to cut a chunk of my hair off to free myself. FML
Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML
Today, as I tried to get out of bed, I got my foot tangled in my sheets. I reached out to my dresser to avoid falling flat on my face. I didn't fall, but I did manage to smash my fingers in the drawer while still trapped in the sheets. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML
Today, after having a pretty rough day, I decided a nice, hot shower would be great. Ten minutes in, the shower head apparently couldn't take the water pressure anymore, and it flew off and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was moving into my new house. While trying to turn on the light in the bedroom, I realized I couldn't reach the string on the fan. I got a chair, climbed up, reached over, and fell badly. While writhing in agony on the floor, I looked over to see a light switch on the wall. FML
Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML
Today, I felt suicidal and told my mum I was going to hang myself from my curtain rod. All she cared about was the rod possibly coming loose and damaging the wall. FML
Today, I lifted up my blinds, only for them to detach from the wall, hit me on the head, knock a pile of paper over, spill a can of Pepsi, leave plaster all over the floor and a gaping hole in the wall above my window. FML
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Top comments
gabfoundnemo 5
You should snap that bastard in two over your knee and show it who's boss. ......then submit another FML saying you broke your leg ;)
jasonbrosef 0
You just got draped.
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Comments (95)
myalleyway 9
how could you not know how to put up CURTAINS? i's a metal/wood pole and cloth! but that does sound painful, and i feel bad for you.
grands138 4
Be honest with us... Do your shoes still have Velcro on them because you can't figure out what comes after loop and swoop?
winnerme123 8
Duct tape can work wonders.
Brelywi 15
YDI for being too dumb to put up curtains.
whyusofat 17
Boom. HEADSHOT!
KYLEW72 3
Your stupid
JayDeLaGhetto 7
How ironic...
unknown_user5566 27
You're*. Please use spell check prior to posting comments that are meant to insult others.
unknown_user5566 27
Also, why would anyone put their phone number on FML??
ManInTheMachine 20
kyleekay: Because they're either: A. An idiot B. Completely oblivious to what kind of people lurk on the internet C. Desperate D. All of the above
unknown_user5566 27
D! I choose D! What did I win?? ;)
Quikraptor 8
You're* I don't care if someone beat me to it.
olpally 33
65- she beat you by an hour and 4 minutes... She didn't just beat you to it by a minute, she owned you on that correction... Lol...
unknown_user5566 27
So... Does the carpet match the curtains? ;)
xxGhost_Wolfxx 2
I had hoped someone wouldn't post this before I had the chance. Bravo Madam.
unknown_user5566 27
I do what I can. ;)
Calyx_fml 22
Why, that's curtains for you!
candylandy 1
Aww! I know how you feel, I never read instructions :)
unknown_user5566 27
Does it matter?