Today, I was trying to put some new curtains up. I couldn't make sense of the instructions, so I decided to wing it. I spent a frustrating half hour fighting with it, and just seconds after I succeeded, the curtain rod gave way and slammed straight onto my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I attempted to assemble a piece of furniture that claimed to be "easy to build in minutes." Four hours and multiple arguments later, I realized I had misread the instructions, and half the parts were upside down. I'm pretty sure the furniture won this round. FML
Today, I tried to use a fancy new hairstyling tool and ended up getting my hair tangled in it. I had to cut a chunk of my hair off to free myself. FML
Today, I tried to put together some flat-pack furniture. I wound up in my underpants, screaming stuff like, "Fuck you, fucking Ikea bastard" at pieces of confusing plywood. FML
Today, as I tried to get out of bed, I got my foot tangled in my sheets. I reached out to my dresser to avoid falling flat on my face. I didn't fall, but I did manage to smash my fingers in the drawer while still trapped in the sheets. FML
Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML
Today, after having a pretty rough day, I decided a nice, hot shower would be great. Ten minutes in, the shower head apparently couldn't take the water pressure anymore, and it flew off and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was moving into my new house. While trying to turn on the light in the bedroom, I realized I couldn't reach the string on the fan. I got a chair, climbed up, reached over, and fell badly. While writhing in agony on the floor, I looked over to see a light switch on the wall. FML
Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML
Today, I felt suicidal and told my mum I was going to hang myself from my curtain rod. All she cared about was the rod possibly coming loose and damaging the wall. FML
Today, I lifted up my blinds, only for them to detach from the wall, hit me on the head, knock a pile of paper over, spill a can of Pepsi, leave plaster all over the floor and a gaping hole in the wall above my window. FML
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Top comments
gabfoundnemo 5
You should snap that bastard in two over your knee and show it who's boss. ......then submit another FML saying you broke your leg ;)
jasonbrosef 0
You just got draped.
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Comments (95)
DocBastard 40
1) Drill rod supports into wall 2) Put curtain over rod 3) Hang rid on supports Wow...cryptic indeed. Who the hell could decipher THAT?
ManInTheMachine 20
What the **** is a drill?
ManInTheMachine 20
Ah. But then if the action is drilling, what are you using to complete the action? No Noor, not that. Perv.
nerobluerose 10
How do you put the curtains on the rod? Rods don't normally hold things well by themselves.
KitGrey 4
Maybe that will knock some sense into you?
Cowgirl9999 8
Ouch
Jordan740 6
That was deep...
DoubleCross 9
**** IKEA.
tennisrapper1 14
Seems like you need to work on comprehension skills. Not too hard to put up a curtain... Nevertheless, I hope you get better. That must have hurt!
olpally 33
I work at ikea... Instructions are easy to read if you aren't a complete ******* moron... In response to all the haters of ikea... Jerks!
MCRaddict15 15
I have no idea what they're talking about because I've never had trouble deciphering directions and IKEA dumbs it down a lot.
olpally 33
Thank you 34!! It's really easy :)
Jennielee 6
I love IKEA!
cherry72 13
I love Ikea too! Wish we had one in Oklahoma ... Tulsa preferably.
taternuts 0
I'm not sure you succeeded.
ICastillo 25
Come on man.... It's not that hard to put up a shower rod.
furordei 2
It's not that hard to read either.... But you seem to be having trouble with that.
ManInTheMachine 20
Ahh...house work. Where productivity meets mortal patience. Stay strong, OP! 'Tis merely a flesh wound. Now get your ass back up and fix that curtain! ...After some ice cream and Monty Python, of course. ;)
emeraldisle 30
There's instructions for a reason.