Today, I was told to “use Chapstick, for God’s sake” for the hundredth time in my life. I have tried Chapstick, Aquaphor, Burt's Bees, Vaseline, Shea butter, coconut oil, and Bag Balm. I drink 8 glasses of water a day. I’ve been to doctor after doctor, and nothing will fix my crusty, dry lips. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, someone held me down and rubbed ChapStick all over my lips. I have a condition which requires medicinal balm, otherwise my lips crack and bleed, and ChapStick makes it worse. I’m still waiting on the balm to arrive. FML
Today, I was having lunch with my mom before an important job interview. She commented than my lips looked dry and crackly and gave me her chapstick with aloe to put on. Apparently I'm allergic to aloe and my lips got so swollen I could hardly talk. It was too late to reschedule the interview. FML
Today, I used a glue stick instead of my Carmex lip balm. FML
Today, my lips were dry and chapped, so I asked if I could use some of my friend's chapstick. She didn't mind, so I quickly put some on. Only later did I notice that my lips were sparkly. Turns out it was glitter balm. Now everyone calls me "princess." FML
Today, I discovered a cold sore in my ear, which I need to treat with a cream. Because of health issues, I already have six different creams and lotions to apply to various parts of my body, including buttcrack and hair. FML
Today, I realized why I've developed painful, flaky, dry patches above my upper lip. It's from kissing my new boyfriend, whose facial hair irritates my skin. He really dislikes how he looks without it, so my best option might be to just stop kissing him. FML
Today, I was written up at work for not smiling. It’s winter, therefore smiling will cause my lips to crack and bleed. I drink 8 glasses of water a day. FML
Today, I'm on a medication that really dehydrates my skin. I thought split lips were the worst side effects. Other split orifices make a trip to the toilet a literal pain in the arse. No sign of stopping in the near future. FML
Today, I woke up with really dry, chapped lips. Still in bed, without my glasses on, I sleepily reached down into my purse for some chapstick and applied it. Upon awakening later I realized I had mistaken a mini Sharpie permanent marker for chapstick. I have a job interview today. FML
Today, I was talking to myself and got distracted when I was going to put chapstick on my lips. I took the cap off my deodorant and put it on my lips. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
Then get a humidifier.
Vesi 30
I had the same problem. Blistex Medicated finally fixed my issue. There are two "flavours" but I tend to prefer Mint to the original. Maybe give it a try? I keep one in my desk, one on my nightstand and one in my bag for when I leave the house.
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Comments (5)
Chazzster 32
Then get a humidifier.
DLBL 23
what will wet air do that drinking water and oiling the lips is not already doing?
Vesi 30
I had the same problem. Blistex Medicated finally fixed my issue. There are two "flavours" but I tend to prefer Mint to the original. Maybe give it a try? I keep one in my desk, one on my nightstand and one in my bag for when I leave the house.
Yudith 28
Beware of the Mint flavor as mint makes lips go dry
Charlie Given 28
Go see a dermatologist, friend of mine years ago had a similar issue it turned out he had a skin fungal infection on his lips!
tiptoppc 21
Also, if you’ve ever had severe frostbite of your face and/or lips, this will continue indefinitely. My wife can attest to that. Both her hands and lips were 3rd degree frostbite. It makes your body constantly regenerate cells super quick and causes this
SAgirl 23
Less medical related. Do you sleep with your mouth open? Quite surprising how many people do when you look into it. If you do, try something that helps keep it closed at tight so that you breath through your nose and dont dry out our mouth and lips.