Today, my boyfriend tried to compliment my date-night attire. His brain couldn't decide between, "So pretty" and, "You're the shit," so his mouth decided, "You're so shitty" would suffice. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend, feeling pretty low. I said something along the lines of, "You like me even when I look like shit." He replied, "Ah, that's just how you naturally look." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I'm beautiful. Before I could thank him, he continued, "Too bad it takes a shit-load of makeup." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were out shopping. As he was trying on shirts, I told him that the particular shirt he was wearing looked ugly. He turned around, sighed, and said "You think? Well, your face is ugly, but you don't see me complaining about it." He was serious. FML
Today, my boyfriend compared me to an unattractive actress. When I said it was sort of messed up to say that to me since she's not pretty, he said, "She's not as bad as you." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if I looked alright for our date. He said, "Honey, you look fine, just don't go out in public like that." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were at a restaurant with a few other couples, and my boyfriend started to rant on how "all the hot chicks are dumb." Apparently, I'm either ugly or stupid. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend his shirt and pants did not match and that he should change for dinner. All my belongings are now on the sidewalk. FML
Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML
Today, while out with my boyfriend, I gave a beggar some cash, who then smiled at me and said to my boyfriend, "You have a beautiful little lady, take good care of her." Flattered, I hoped my boyfriend would agree with the compliment. He turned and said, "Hear that? He said you were little." FML
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Top comments
Haecceitas 13
Oh dear, he tried! Laugh about that, relax and give him a little hell ;)
RichardPencil 32
I feel shitty Oh, so shitty. I feel shitty and witty and gay... Yep, we need to do a West Side Story reboot.
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Comments (12)
Haecceitas 13
Oh dear, he tried! Laugh about that, relax and give him a little hell ;)
RichardPencil 32
I feel shitty Oh, so shitty. I feel shitty and witty and gay... Yep, we need to do a West Side Story reboot.
PryderPlayer017 5
That made me think of Anger Management lol
pins91 27
Cute!
AmbrosiaFan 19
So beautiful you got him tongue tied. Adorable!
JackWood 21
You should have replied, "Oh really? Thank you! You're shitty too!
EmDizzle2007 28
at least you understood.
DrSamba 7
I once read a comic strip in which a boy hands his girlfriend a love note that she angrily throws back in his face and walks off. Confused, he calls after her, "Angel face!" and she stops, turns around, and gives him a hug. She realizes he had spelled it "angle face".
Wadlaen 24
10 for attempt, 0 for implementation - 10+0=10 - he's a tenner, worth keeping!💕
zoelog 10
so you know he just made a mistake. that he didnt mean it. not sure why you're upset.
anRNsLife 11
When I was in the nervous phase with a huge crush on my now boyfriend he had a new hat and I told him that it was awful. I meant “awesome” and “cool” at the same time. (Yeah, I tried to bust out a “that’s cool”. I’m really less nervous with him going on 3 yrs but I still get butterflies when I’m with him. Lol