Today, my husband and I are still having a dumb fight over remodeling. He's decided to take an immature route and pretends to be asleep whenever I walk into a room so he doesn't have to talk about it. Earlier, he pretended to fall asleep at the dinner table. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked my husband for help with a household chore. His response was to fake snore and pretend to be asleep. Later, our toddler pulled the exact same BS when I asked him to pick up his toys. FML
Today, I'm in bed pretending to sleep because I don't want to see my husband. He's manipulative and a jerk to me some times. I just don't want to deal with him anymore. FML
Today, I realized that I've been intentionally causing arguments with my husband because the spare bed is more comfortable. FML
Today, my husband is miserable. He couldn't sleep. He tried to make me feel bad for sleeping through the night. I was medicated from a brain scan. His is work is horrible, and no one understands, etc. He's mad that I took a walk. Now, as I am frustrated and crying, he is laughing on the phone with his coworkers. FML
Today, my husband yet again procrastinated on a project for so long, that he now has to work during the weekend. When I asked whether or not we could still spend some free time together, he started ranting about how I ruin his career. He seriously thinks it's about us and not his horrible planning skills. FML
Today, my partner got mad at me for forgetting to turn off the bedroom light when coming back from brushing my teeth, and has chosen to sleep in our spare bedroom over it. FML
Today, while in bed, I tried to explain how overworked and unappreciated I feel doing all the housework to my fiancé. It was only when I'd finished my long rant that I realized he had been asleep almost the whole time. FML
Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML
Today, my husband (M72) and I (F69) had yet another argument over all the time he spends away from home doing hobbies and volunteering. After an emotional conversation about my moving out, he said, "Well, if we are done talking about that, let me tell you what I got to do today." Biggest emotional slap ever. FML
Today, it's been about two months since I made my husband sleep in the spare room after an argument. I invited him back to our room after two nights but he refused. Since then he’s moved a TV, Xbox, fridge and new armchair into the spare room, and put a lock on the door only he has a key for. I’ve barely seen him. FML
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Top comments
Ruler3000 17
I'm curious if he went face first in food...
matt98_fml 13
Throw a bucket of cold water on him to see if he "wakes" up.
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Comments (97)
ohSNAPyall 27
That's healthy.
boxbrandon11 20
Don't cook for him next time
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
That's a face/desk situation
nikkkkkiii 7
Two can play that game. Pretend to fall asleep every time he wants to have some "fun". That'll get him talking real quick.
Greendaycheese 12
!!
Adorlee 11
I think he'll get in her pants regardless if she's sleeping or not
Dpac7 19
She doesn't really have to be awake for that.
Ruler3000 17
I'm curious if he went face first in food...
matt98_fml 13
Throw a bucket of cold water on him to see if he "wakes" up.
folfg0 12
Well his little game is obviously working. She's on here instead of arguing with him. Just thought I'd throw that out there. So who's the "child/idiot/etc" now? :P
emilyjgraham 34
still him because he's a grown man acting like a child. I'd want to complain to someone/something as well!
evilplatypus 39
37 - just because she's on here, doesn't mean she's not still arguing with him. Some people are capable of multitasking.
matt98_fml 13
Or maybe she wanted to vent to us fmlers to get our point of view and show the comments all to her husband.
perdix 31
More food for you! When his little game results in a fat wife, he'll give up.
dougiewhale 6
Then the husband would have sex with the liposuction fat instead of OP.
LoveGuru69 0
give him a blumpkin and he will start treating you with more respect. Trust me, i know from experience ;)
Snazzy_Snaz 17
81- that's so ******* gross
theamazingone_12 7
He needs to grow up and you need to remodel the house! If he dosent want to input his ideas ohhh well hes had lots of chances
Donat96 20
Narcolepsy is a serious condition.
bossroyd 4
Just pretend to fall asleep during sexy times with him and see how he feels
Yaen 18
Genius.
FuzzyJack 15
Just start remodeling without him. He'll stop acting like a kid soon enough.
nanpooo 6
Give him a rude awakening. He might stop pretending to be asleep. Although it might result in him doing something else stupid...
RpiesSPIES 27
That's the best strategy to get out of things you don't want to do :)
ZiplockP 0
I just slept through your comment.