Today, it was my birthday. My parents came into my room at 12:01 to surprise me. Do you know what fifteen year-olds do at midnight? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML
Today, my dad's girlfriend threw me a birthday party and all the gifts, decorations, and the cake were according to my age, which they thought was 12. I turned 13 today. FML
Today, I went to a surprise birthday party for a friend. Everyone was hiding and waiting to yell "Surprise!" when I got a call from my mom. I was loudly discussing family gossip and trying to get my mom to hang up when the door opened. Everyone yelled "Surprise!" and then turned to stare at me. FML
Today, I walked into a restaurant with my parents to celebrate my Mom's birthday. They immediately got a kid's menu and crayons out for me. I'm 15. FML
Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML
Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home at 1am this morning from a friend's birthday party. I'm 30 years old. FML
Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML
Today, it's my 15th birthday. My dad stumbled into my bedroom at six in the morning, completely drunk, and slurred the "Happy Birthday" song. Then he told me to go fuck myself, and said that he wished I was never born. Me too, dad. Me too. FML
Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML
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Top comments
aznboytellem 0
WERE U PLAYIN POKEMANZ?
tyhillman 0
Ha at least it was dark, either way sucks for you
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Comments (453)
xxbaxter310xx 0
u should try and get laid if not get a pocket pussy
barca09 0
for everyone stupid enough to not know what he's talking about, he's wacking off
wingedspiritus 0
Or looking at pron. Probably both.
REDCRAYON 0
I play Call Of Duty 4 or 5 every midnight.. lol I don't think that's an fml.. but I get wat ur saying.. sucks for u
jasonkoor 0
I don't jack off in my room I do it in the toilet. I'm 15. and I got caught cuz i didnt lock the door one time. FML
My_averageFML 0
nice. either masturbating or having sex. wonderful.
shotlilaussie 0
JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
Gina_1379 0
haha thats what i was thinking
Newtrier 0
haha #2 u idiot he wacking off dumbass. lol this one reminds me off myself being a 15 year old boy hu jacks off at 12
nanoflacka 0
Um... O I GOT IT... YOUR MOTHER
El_mariachi 0
hahahaha AWwwwwwwKward
ashiedeanilz 0
hahaha #167! 'everyone was surprised this time' lol haha!