Today, I was so lethargic talking to my co-worker about her raise that I accidently told her to celebrate with a family vacation. I totally forgot that she just started divorce proceedings and that her mom is dying. Meanwhile, I'm stuck making $42,000 a year, and have a cat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to explain to my boss that the reason I was sobbing hysterically as she told me that I was getting a pay raise was because I was going to the vet to have my sick and dying cat put down. Good news at a bad time. FML
Today, via a situation too complicated to explain, I accidentally cost my boss almost 50,000, on the same day his wife asked for a divorce and his dog died. I’m almost too scared to tell him how I screwed up, in case it sends him completely off the deep end. FML
Today, I got a promotion. I was really excited until I realized that the only friend I had to celebrate with was my pet cat. FML
Today, I was happy because my co-worker was almost about to get fired due to his lazy habits. It was all going so well. Then I accidentally put my biggest sale yet under his name. FML
Today, my mom called me an attention seeker and threw a bitch fit because my cat "decided" to die on her birthday. FML
Today, I got promoted at work and was excited to tell my mom. When I called her, she immediately asked, “What does this mean for my retirement fund?” and then asked how much I was going to be making. I told her, and she responded, “Oh. That’s nice, but when are you getting a real job?” FML
Today, my coworker left a tiny mess in the break room. I cleaned it up and jokingly said, "Your mother isn't here to clean up after you." She started crying. I forgot her mom died last week. FML
Today, I was crying at my desk at work. My colleague tried to cheer me up by saying: "Don't worry, I'm sure you will find a new job soon". I didn't even know I was fired. I was crying because my cat died this morning. FML
Today, I accidentally called my boss "Mom." Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML
Today, my boss told me that I was getting a promotion. I was so excited to tell my family and friends the good news, but when I got home and checked my bank account, I realized that I had accidentally transferred all of my savings to my ex's account. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Even with that paltry salary, you should be able to afford a dictionary so you can look up what "lethargic" means. You could have said insensitive, oblivious, forgetful, distracted, careless to describe why you abused your coworker like that.
Jonkbaby 23
So f your life, your coworkers life or f my life? I'm lost
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
Even with that paltry salary, you should be able to afford a dictionary so you can look up what "lethargic" means. You could have said insensitive, oblivious, forgetful, distracted, careless to describe why you abused your coworker like that.
Jonkbaby 23
So f your life, your coworkers life or f my life? I'm lost
Alan Staff 59
Porque no los dos?
D J's MOM 17
your salary isn't that bad, unless you live in Manhattan.
Shzusuziq11 12
I'm retired and wish I made 42,000 a year! (I do have a dog) 😁