Today, after I drank way too much, my friend pulled the car over so I could throw up. Next to my pile of puke was a discarded shoe that looked remarkably like one from my favorite pair. When I got home, I realized that my left shoe was missing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while trying to act sober in front of my parents when I got home, I threw up on my mom's shoe. FML
Today, I was having a good time drinking with a few friends. Next thing I know, I'm walking down an unknown street, with just one shoe, no wallet and no phone. FML
Today, I found my missing shoe. It hit me as it fell out the tree in our front yard. FML
Today, my girlfriend was in the back seat of a car with one of my friends when she got sick and puked all over one of his dress shoes. My friend then asked me to replace his shoes, since she is technically unemployed and couldn't pay him back. We eventually agreed that I would pay for one shoe. FML
Today, I woke up to a tap on my shoulder and had no idea where I was. I quickly discovered It was 11 am and I was still at the bar I had been drinking at the night before. My shoes were gone. FML
Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML
Today, I had a horrible headache on my way home from lunch. I pulled over and vomited so forcefully I peed my pants, a lot. I had pee in my shoes. FML
Today, while at my dorm, I experienced a vomit-inducing migraine. In my hurry to get to the bathroom to puke, I couldn't find a pair of shoes. I urgently needed the toilet, so I braved the communal bathroom barefoot. As I opened the stall door, I stepped in someone else's fresh vomit. FML
Today, I came home to find that my dog had taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He'd also taken a dump in my house shoe. FML
Today, I got home from a holiday to find out that my flatmate had thrown a party. Everything seemed fine at first, then I noticed that someone had taken a dump in my running shoes that were in my bedroom closet. FML
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Top comments
mzhonesty 0
Drink less, dumbass. If you can't handle your booze, don't drink at all.
WoolyWhoop 7
What a stupid FML.
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Comments (68)
CYNNER 0
Number 29 should go **** HERSELF
kiwicutie_101 0
YDI for being drunk... wow.
hellomikey 0
You're an idiot...
SubjectX 0
how do you people get so smashed? I mean seriously, is that really necessary? I don't know how it's possible to just not care about how much you drink.
CyclonePsycho 1
You puked up a shoe? ._O
TheLetterZero 7
Because it's true. YDI for drinking. You deserve no sympathy.
dntknowaname 0
please continue to post your drunk fmls b/c they are usually some of the best. dont listen to the 12 year old girls who say ydi for drinking and think the only good fmls are ones about some pitiful problem with some boy. that is all
colour_freak_909 0
hahaha nice job XD
trueeast 0
41 is right 42 your such a little bitch no one wants to drink with you so your bitching at everyone else that actually have people to drink with. unless your a little girl which seems to be the case
trueeast 0
in conclusion, 42 kill yourself