Benefits
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overheard my mother-in-law and sister-in-law over the baby monitor. They were talking about how much better off my daughter would be if I were to die. FML
Today, I asked my parents to sign for me to enlist in the military. They asked me how much money the government gives them if I die. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML
Today, while chatting with my in-laws, I told them about my upcoming spinal surgery. Soon after, when I went to get us some drinks, I overheard them murmuring about how many surgeries I've already had, how I'm a drain on the healthcare system, and how I should ideally just die. FML
Today, I listened to a voicemail from my mom about how she misses me and can't wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML
Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML
Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
laestrellita 0
Leave them NOTHING!
mattypants 0
that is so messed up...and someone YDI this... I feel for ya
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (356)
I_am_Lathan 0
Dear #177 I scored an 1890 on my SATs, and a 91 on my ASVAB. I am a straight A student. I too am enlisting in the United States Marine Corps. The United States Marine Corps functions so well because its soldiers are of an elite breed; one that isn't comprised of stupid, lazy dolts who lack the necessary skill set to make it as a civilian, but one comprised of intelligent, selfless individuals who's primary objectives in life are to defend the right to freedom, to serve their country, and to give back to a system that has undeniably (to anyone with a truly open mind) given them so much. Choke on a **** sandwich and die, you ignorant commie f*ck. Semper Fi
kira822_fml 0
At least they didn't say 'When.'
xoxoCheer 0
Aww...I'm sorry. You're doing an amazing thing for this country and deserve every bit of support anyone can give you! God bless you and I hope your family stops being so inconsiderate!
medic1 0
Before you deploy, you will have the option to totally revise your SGLI and your will.. FYI, you can leave them your debts in your will haha. I have been home from Iraq for 8 months and my parents didn't come to see me before I deployed or when I got home. I came home to watching everyone with their families and I was alone. I feel you.
fearmerawr 0
leave the greedy bitches nothing.
S3k5hUn8 0
Stay strong. Selfish people like that family or no will always get there in the end if nothing else ill be praying for you. (My little Brother is Enlisting)
mat4844 0
Just correcting #98, oorah is Marines, and so is semper fi. The army says "oowah" instead.
robertsa426 0
It's actually hooah, if your going to school someone get it right.
jackass02009 0
Dude, get emancipated. It should work, and leave the bitches nothing. Go Egyptian and bury it with you.
baller_906 0
man that's messed up. wat kind of family do u have, they don't care if you die or what.
kellianne 0
I am so sorry that sucks:[