Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overheard my mother-in-law and sister-in-law over the baby monitor. They were talking about how much better off my daughter would be if I were to die. FML
Today, I asked my parents to sign for me to enlist in the military. They asked me how much money the government gives them if I die. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML
Today, while chatting with my in-laws, I told them about my upcoming spinal surgery. Soon after, when I went to get us some drinks, I overheard them murmuring about how many surgeries I've already had, how I'm a drain on the healthcare system, and how I should ideally just die. FML
Today, I listened to a voicemail from my mom about how she misses me and can't wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML
Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML
Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
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Top comments
laestrellita 0
Leave them NOTHING!
mattypants 0
that is so messed up...and someone YDI this... I feel for ya
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Comments (356)
sh84 0
shouldn't have joined the military!!
isuckatlife12 0
well if ur going to be in the marines then its something that ur family needs to think about unless they were like fighting over ur car or something...then that sucks
Asphyxiated_ 0
To whoever said YDI for eavesdropping, stfu. Like you've never eavesdropped in your life, hypocrites. @ OP it really depends how they were planning on using it, but still, FYL. :/
log1k 3
That's unfortunate man. I would have confronted them about it. It seems a bit too early to even be talking about something like that considering you haven't even left yet. Even though we're all probably guilty of these thoughts, talking about it openly like that is inconsiderate. I'd tell them they're getting nothing.
Roddsy 0
that sucks ;/ and LOL @ #28, "Leave everything to your cat." thats awesome..
Tsukasa_fml 0
Today, I was talking with my mother when I noticed my brother start listening in. He recently enlisted in the Marines, so I decided to screw with his head by joking about how to spend the money when he dies. FHL.
dancercuity922 0
thats horrible! good luck in the marines.
Blue_Coconuts 7
#97... Army = Hooah Marines = Oorah Airforce = Hooah (or Hooyah if you're a PJ) Navy = Hooyah Really, they're all mindless grunts, but he was correct in his usage. Semper Fi, would be more like a motto, just as "Rangers Lead the Way" only for the entire branch to promote Esprit De Corps.
JN226 0
Dude, I agree with number 4. Leave them nothing.
prndan123 0
hey for everyone to know im currently in the navy and just returned from afghan and our life insurance is over 400,000 and you can divide it up however you want and you dont have to give a lump sum they can receive multiple payments