Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard my mother-in-law and sister-in-law over the baby monitor. They were talking about how much better off my daughter would be if I were to die. FML
Today, I asked my parents to sign for me to enlist in the military. They asked me how much money the government gives them if I die. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML
Today, while chatting with my in-laws, I told them about my upcoming spinal surgery. Soon after, when I went to get us some drinks, I overheard them murmuring about how many surgeries I've already had, how I'm a drain on the healthcare system, and how I should ideally just die. FML
Today, I listened to a voicemail from my mom about how she misses me and can't wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML
Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML
Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
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Top comments
laestrellita 0
Leave them NOTHING!
mattypants 0
that is so messed up...and someone YDI this... I feel for ya
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Comments (356)
duckpsy 2
this is truly an FML
Iamsopissed 0
I can guess what you going through my friend and I am sorry. I am a army contract and if I found out my family was talking like that they would not get a cent. 1. Put in your will that they cannot keep the money but have to give it away to charity 2. Tell them they get it then leave them nothing 3. Tell them they are not getting a cent and walk away flipping them the bird 4. Write YOU AINT GETTING SHIT in thier yard with gasoline and pour powdered milk in thier front yard the morning dew will wet it and the sun will curdle it. THERE IS NO WAY TO CLEAN THAT UP. p.s. this is my personal favorite
Blue_Coconuts 7
#120, you certainly aren't long-tabbed, because if you were you wouldn't say anything so ******* stupid. Especially since a fair amount of long tabbers are also short tabbed/tripple canopied...
the_question_mar 0
If you did die, they'd feel really bad...
XDss 0
thanks for serving our country :D
PFCAngelo 0
YDI for enlisting in the Marines, I went to bootcamp and graduated November 21 last year. Bootcamps fun, its the shit afterwards that is IRRITATING AS ****.
Huevo_fml 0
Take all your money before you go
dante_101 0
a true FML.. feel sorry for u... it really sucks to have people like that in one's lyf... :'(
blindy_fml 0
All that bullshit will hopefully be worth it when you can proudly call yourself a Marine. Give 'em hell!
benw2200 0
#39.. "high rank, a Sergeant or Captain or something"..LOL Gotta love civilians that don't know the rank structure.. and #97.. gotta love the fakers. Try saying hoorah, hoah, hooya, etc, to ANY real Marine.. stand the **** by.