Today, my wife came home and said, "Before you go into the garage, let me tell you what happened…" She was stopped at a traffic light and when it turned green, she stepped on the gas, but the truck in front of her didn't. The grill was smashed and the car has a 3-inch hole in the bumper. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while getting gas, a hottie pulled-up to the pump next to me. I finished filling my tank and started to drive away. As I was checking her out and paying no attention to my driving, I ended up taking the front bumper off her car with my truck. FML
Today, I was driving in my very own car that I bought and paid for myself, when I stopped at a stop light. Then I noticed the truck in front of me turn on his reverse lights. I honked desperately. He hits me, looks out the window and says, "I see no damage" and drives away. FML
Today, I was forced to look on in utter horror as an old lady backed out of her parking space, kept going well past the turning point, and slammed straight into my car, putting a dent in the front and shattering the headlights. FML
Today, my wife screamed to stop the car in an intersection, so I slammed on the brakes. From the left, an SUV rammed full force into us. My wife is unharmed, but I now have a broken left arm and our car is totaled. On the bright side, she caught the Pokémon in the road. FML
Today, my girlfriend was driving on a busy highway when she slammed on the brakes, causing a multi-car accident. She then ran across several lanes, almost getting smashed by a truck, because she thought she saw a dog in the road. It was already dead. Insurance is gonna be a nightmare. FML
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. My wife got pissed when I didn't immediately check on her, but rather the other driver. That other driver was my daughter. FML
Today, I drove my husband's car to the mall because my car was in the shop. The bumper was being repaired because I got rear ended while stopped at a traffic light. While stopped at the same intersection I got rear ended again. FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, on my way home, a truck driver was speeding next to me and as he passed I saw his truck was the kind that takes livestock to be butchered. I was thinking that I didn’t look to see if there were animals in there. Suddenly, brown items hit my windshield. Yes, it didn’t "hit the fan," it hit my car. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
Unfortunately, I think her impatience puts her at fault for this one. If she traded info with the truck driver, you could be footing the bill for the repairs to both vehicles.
PhoenixChick 26
You wife pronounces "I rear ended someone because I'm a moron" funny
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Comments (13)
BurnInDemonFire 39
Unfortunately, I think her impatience puts her at fault for this one. If she traded info with the truck driver, you could be footing the bill for the repairs to both vehicles.
PhoenixChick 26
You "think" her impatientce puts her at fault? She flat our rear ended someone when they were both stopped. First time drivers know you don't just hit the gas and hope the cars ahead of you start moving when you want to go.
RichardPencil 32
Dump her! You deserve better! I hope you mean EX-wife! Too much?
onestep1996 14
No, seems about the right amount compared to how people usually react on this site
burnforeternity 30
Definitely a little too much
RichardPencil 32
I need to switch to decaf!!!! Why so many exclamation points?!?!?!?
TumblrweedPasses 11
Time for a driving lesson i think Sadly it's on her if it comes to paying out for both damages
PhoenixChick 26
You wife pronounces "I rear ended someone because I'm a moron" funny
Venom1999 19
So (no offense), your wife can't drive.
1ninjanina 7
Someone needs a lesson in patience, being aware of the driver in front of you, and defensive driving. For perspective, I am a little bit of an aggressive driver, but not to the point of stupidity.
GUYMAINE 16
Well the upside, you get to pay for it
zuckerburg 21
That's what happens when you're on your cellphone instead of looking in-front of you. Doesn't count if you see a light change in your peripherals
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Was she playing on her phone or something? Idiot... if this was her posting the story, I'd say YDI for sure. I'm a female and even I say most women can't drive. Almost every accident video I see involves a woman or some moron playing on their damn phone. One of my major pet peeves.