Today, I woke up early to bake cinnamon rolls for a party. I came home later to find the whole tray spilled onto the floor, most of the rolls eaten, and my dog sitting happily nearby. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried my hand at baking homemade individual apple tarts. While taking them out of the oven, I dropped the entire tray on the floor. My dog acted like it was Christmas in August and scarfed at least half of them. FML
Today, I spent hours baking a multi-layered, detailed cake from scratch for my mom's birthday. It took two seconds for my dog to devour the cake while I picked up a spoon I dropped on the floor. FML
Today, I came home to find my dog had learned how to open our fridge. He ate the birthday cake I was saving for a friend's surprise party, and to add insult to injury, he'd also apparently thrown the barely digested cake up all over my bed. FML
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, I came home to find the dog had learned how to open our stair-gate and kitchen door, devoured the entire fruitcake I'd made for a special occasion, and then vomited said fruitcake all over the fabric sofa. FML
Today, I was trying out a new pizza recipe that I saw online. I made the dough, spread the sauce, and added my toppings. As I was about to put it in the oven, I realized I'd forgotten to preheat it. No big deal, or so I thought. I then knocked the entire fucking uncooked pizza face-first onto the kitchen floor. The dog ate better than I did tonight. FML
Today, I'd finally got home from a 15-hour shift at work and wanted to lay down and eat. I poured myself a bowl of cereal, went to my room, and sat it on my bed. My dog then jumped right on my bed and yanked the sheets off, causing the cereal to fly everywhere. FML
Today, I tripped over my dog while carrying groceries. As I laid on the floor surrounded by smashed eggs, spilled milk, and a bruised knee, my dog stole the bread from the bag and and ran off. FML
Today, I helped myself to some homemade biscuits that had been left in the kitchen. I thought they looked a little odd, but they tasted pretty good. I found out later they were homemade dog treats. FML
Today, after working an 11 hour shift, I decided to treat myself to a delicious Krispy Kreme doughnut. When I got home, I sat down, put my feet up, poured myself a cold glass of milk. My dog jumped on my lap and vomited all over my doughnuts, stared at me, then bit the doughnut out of my hand. FML
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Top comments
KhaleesiDannie 26
Well at least someone was happy
LilMissCanadian 22
FYL, that must have been awful to see. YDI to your dog when he gets fat.
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Comments (57)
abnormaalz 7
well, he must really like them if he ate almost all of them! Now lets hope he doesn't gets sick/fat...
analbeadlicker 14
Ermagherd, I'm sincerely sorry for your loss
Jirekianu2 19
YDI for not putting them in a safe and secure place. you're lucky the dog didn't get sick.
thisguy22 33
At least he left a few for you...
crazydragon42 10
rip doggy
samlovesham1234 9
Bad dog! Bad, bad dog!
Zarcissa 34
I'm surprised at both the FML and the comments. Don't you people train your puppies to not take anything from a counter, etc? My mom once left a dog treat on a chair with the intention of giving it to our dog as she went out but got called to help a neighbor instead. When she returned the treat was still there and the dog was looking at it like "Can I have that?" My mom was honestly surprised that our dog hadn't taken it - shows how well she obeys her training. :)
geekpower_fml 28
Even if trained, dogs will do what they know is wrong when we aren't looking. Depends on how food motivated the dog is.
my_dog_is_better 19
I thought it said cannabis rolls for some reason and I got really worried for your dog
False_Stupidity 42
No, those are for a different party.
Rainbow_Rhinos 23
YDI for leaving food out where your dog can reach it. FYL because sometimes people forget things, and that would've sucked.
hoosiergirl94 31
I hate when my dog does this stuff. But I just have to learn to keep stuff out of her reach and keep her in her crate while I'm gone. And she eats like I haven't fed her in years!