Today, I returned to Germany for a break from my studies abroad. I got lost while out for groceries, so I tried asking a guy for directions. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners not bothering to learn the local language. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML
Today, I got lost in a foreign city while on vacation and couldn't communicate with anyone, because I didn't speak the language and no one seemed to be able, or even wanted, to speak to me in mine. FML
Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML
Today, my husband and I went on vacation. We got lost and had to ask the locals for directions to our hotel. Neither of us could understand their accents, and we ended up wandering around blindly for hours until we made it back on our own. FML
Today, out of desperation, I had to fight my social anxiety in order ask a stranger for directions in a new city. She gave me a detailed answer, and I thanked her, then walked the wrong way for 15 minutes because I was too embarrassed to admit I’d understood none of it past the first sentence. FML
Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML
Today, I found out the German I've been learning for nearly a month is a dialect only spoken by people in a small area of the country. This means I'll need to re-learn most of what I thought I knew. FML
Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML
Today, while on a vacation, I tried to step out of myself and flirt with this boy who I thought was cute. He was going along with it and nodding so I thought it was working. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he didn't speak English. FML
Today, I found out that while on foreign exchange for over six months now, I have been pronouncing the word for "night" in German wrong. Apparently, this whole time, the way that I have been pronouncing it in German means "naked". This explains a lot. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
pheebs314 17
I'm friends with a girl who was an exchange student from Germany in high school and after a few months of being surrounded by English all the time, she even had a hard time talking to her parents on the phone.
DocBastard 40
I often fumble over my words when I've been studying broads.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (81)
ICastillo 25
I've seen to much movies to tell people I'm lost in a foreign country. They will kidnap your ass and sell you into sex slavery.
lilhellian 27
If you watched "Taken" then all you have to do is talk to someone at the airport..
Enslaved 38
"Good Luck"
danial1214 21
Icastillo i love your bio, quoting batman i see ;)
lpro 10
If you went back home how come you don't know your way around?
BigSexy123 11
Studying abroad can last a long time. It can be disorienting returning home after such a long time. Time doesn't remain suspended when you leave; things will change and it can be difficult to readjust to coming home.
djgoreo 12
OP might even live in a bigger city or some such explanation.
micahdunk 13
What a nice welcome home.
Kidkaplan 19
Its amazing what google translate can do
lilhellian 27
Op may not have a smartphone. So no luxery of google translate.. Plus it is not always right..
lilhellian 27
O and if Op did have a smartphone Op could have just used the gps on it...
Xotoolyxo 16
Brain fart
superrocket19 17
I hope he didn't understand what you were doing
perdix 31
Call him a "schweinhund!" Trust me, I learned German from "Hogan's Heroes." ;)
Obey_StudBoii 23
I'm just saying. You have to give respect In order to receive it. If you look at OP"s post it clearly states that there was no wrong doing.
stubrnirishiiiii 7
So you got that he was muttering about rude foreigners but you couldn't recall a word for the grocery store?? Oooookay then
jmacfan1 16
When you don't speak your native tongue for a long time you will forget how to say some things but still remember others