Today, I was at a family reunion, but I've always hated my family. I walked up behind my husband and said, "I can't wait to go home and get it on." My husband turned around. It was my uncle, wearing the same hat as my husband's. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a family reunion and there were a lot of people there that I didn't know. The person that I'd been sleeping with for about 7 months showed up. He's my cousin. FML
Today, I went to a family reunion with my brother and my mother. She spent quite a while giving a glowing introduction for my brother to one of her cousins. Then, just before walking off, she jerked a thumb in my direction and said, "Oh, yeah, and that's his sister." FML
Today, our family reunion began with my sister calling my brother's current crazy girlfriend by his last crazy girlfriend's name and ended with my dad telling my adopted niece that he wanted a family picture without her in it, but she could be in the next one. FML
Today, I went to a family reunion and made the mistake of wearing the same shirt as my cousin, who is known for always wanting to be the center of attention. She took one look at me, pointed, and said, “Oh, I see you’re copying me now, huh?” Then, my aunt overheard and said, “Well, she is your cousin, so it’s not like it’s a crime.” FML
Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML
Today, I was walking home from the store when I saw my uncle. I went over and gave him a surprise hug. He grabbed my ass. He wasn't really my uncle. FML
Today, I went to dinner with my husband's family to celebrate our nephew's birthday. He spent the entire dinner flirting with his sister, then got offended when I said that his behavior was weird. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend after we went to my family reunion. I heard him complaining that I didn't have any "slutty cousins" he could cheat on me with. FML
Today, I was at the gym, when I saw my uncle at the front desk. I quietly went up behind him and slapped him hard on the back while yelling "What's up, loser?!" He turned around. It wasn't my uncle. FML
Today, I visited my Grandma's house, and my uncle happened to be there. As expected, and all the time, he greeted with his signature shit-eating, "I see what you did there" face. He's been doing that to me ever since he saw me masturbating when I was a little kid. I'm 47, married, and have 2 kids now. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
kings1fan 6
Look on the bright side. Your uncle doesn't know you hate your family. He just thinks your horny as hell!
coolkid_matt 11
Awkward! :S
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (133)
herop 0
Good luck! I hope you are still alive in that family reunion
Majstr 23
Run for your life.
herop 0
No i was talking about "they didnt kill you with a gun?"
Kyzahhh 7
Did he have a creepy grin when he turned around?
Mr_Chow 5
Mash and dash?
awagh666 14
Heheheh Maybe he gave her the 'rape glare'
G_thelegend 0
"today, my niece told me she couldn't wait to make love to me. at our family reunion. FML"
winner2013 0
Hahaha damn!!!!!!
seanders 10
Lol I wonder what was on his mind that evening?
bullrider92 19
"My niece is so hot and she wants to make love to me."Something along those lines.
imustbeinsane 2
At least she said "make love" as opposed to... well you know
LaydiexSkull 3
At least OP said "make love" instead of something like "I'm totally gonna f*ck your brains out tonight" or an equally dirty variation of that :p
sean616 3
fail
Ruler3000 17
So is your comment.
coolkid_matt 11
Awkward! :S
aFatFuck 0
"I can't wait to go home and make love." *Uncle slowly turns head around revealing a grin from ear to ear, creepily penetrating you with his perverted stare* "AAWWWWW YYEEEEAAAAAA"
GuitarFail123 9
so was i supposed to laugh from tht? (>^-^)>
hailphire130 0
Op's eyes slowly widen revealing a face of pure horror and her lips curl in disgust as the full impact of what she's done hits her. "AAWWWWW SSHHHHIIIITT"
kings1fan 6
Look on the bright side. Your uncle doesn't know you hate your family. He just thinks your horny as hell!
matthewbrazier 0
True
leadman1989 16
Who talks like that? Come on girl give us some dirty talk... but not to your uncle that would be creepy... Also try not to hate your family if at all possible. :
bullrider92 19
Especially at a family reunion.Being around family that you hate makes you horny?
RainbowHeadache 2
I know. I can't say "making love" without feeling like an idiot. My boyfriend says it & I laugh every time. Why'd she have to wait until they got home? I'm sure wherever the fam reunion is has an area perfect for bangin. Gives you fuel to make it through the reunion, OP. Think about it.
rubyjames 3
"oh uh... oh god i'm sorry"
bizarre_ftw 22
Nice!! Pic! Very artsy ^_^
wild_n_out 8
what are you talking about? she looks constipated.
UrLyfSuxx 0
35- conceited.
yourlifesfucked 0
Not to be a dik, but black and white isn't artsy.
rubyjames 3
omg i was just pretending to be ray charles!! no artsiness here i promise
rubyjames 3
is this good enough?!
kickazz16 15
Awkward turtle.
neliboo 0
extreme awkward turtle~o.o
HeyImJuli 3
Awkward turtle has awkward babies!!!
Millseh 0
Socially awkward penguin wins anyday.
awh_crap 17
Were you that oblivious? Surely you'd look at more than just the hat to differentiate people. FYL for the awkwardness, YDI for being quite so stupid.
bizarre_ftw 22
She could've been drunk. She does hate her family, some people cope by getting pissed
dd809 9
Still not a very good excuse
bloodypanda 0
Do you not realize how big family reunions can get? It was probably crowded in the house and when she saw the hat she got relieved and ran behind him to hide from the family.
dgurlrox 0
Hey. That was a big BURN!
muhilrashid 4
Haha i needed a laugh you just made day thank you . Oh and i hope you and uncle are still cool .... But not that cool ah haha no but seriously FYL
bizarre_ftw 22
Well cool probably doesn't work as she hates him :/
seldom66 16
15- your pic is an epic win.
muhilrashid 4
Thanks man haha