Today, my brother was officially diagnosed with gigantism. According to the specialist doctor, he'll probably be 8 feet tall, if not taller. Hearing this, my brother looked at me and said, "Remember when you used to pick on me for being smaller than you? Karma's a bitch, ain't it?" I’m so screwed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard my ripped, handsome, genetically perfect brother telling my mom how "fat people" make him "nervous". I have only recently accepted my weight, after struggling for years. I now understand why my brother rarely talks to me. FML
Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML
Today, my brother and I got in a fight and he told my friends that I am mentally disabled. They believed him. Apparently, "everything makes sense now." FML
Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML
Today, everyone at school told me to wish my brother a happy birthday. We're twins. FML
Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says, "You're a bitch." He's 6. After I asked him where he heard that word, he responded with, "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML
Today, someone asked me if I was my boyfriend's little sister, just because of our height difference. He's 6'2", I'm 4'11", and this is the fifth time it has happened. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun and nice to pick my little brother up, but no, he accidentally kicked me in the balls. Twice. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my brother. They're both over 6 foot, and big. They glared at each other like they were about to start a fight, then out of nowhere shook hands, hugged while laughing like lunatics, and have been besties all afternoon. Why are gym bros such weird idiots? FML
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Top comments
ojoRojo 27
This should be your brother’s FML, not yours. I don’t feel sorry for you - you reap what you sow. But I do feel for him with that diagnosis.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Considering that people with gigantism tend to suffer from a lot of other problems because it is an issue with the pituitary gland, and the fact that they often die young due to other complications, it seems weird that you would turn around his diagnosis to be all about you. Plus, Size isn't the deciding factor in a fight. Take a couple self defense classes, or join a martial art, and his being 8 feet or taller won't matter in the slightest.
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Comments (8)
ojoRojo 27
This should be your brother’s FML, not yours. I don’t feel sorry for you - you reap what you sow. But I do feel for him with that diagnosis.
jbuckets_404 39
Not "sew," but "sow."
RichardPencil 32
People with gigantism often die young, so you won't have to endure the beatings for very long. In the meantime, learn to use a sling.
jbuckets_404 39
You mean a sling of (the Biblical King) David's ilk, not for a busted arm?
RichardPencil 32
Yes, you got it! When a giant wants to kick your ass, you can look back to history to come up with a solution.
bl3ur0z3 17
Karma is a bitch. Don't pick on people because you do reap what you sow and if weren't delivering Karma, you would get it elsewhere.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Considering that people with gigantism tend to suffer from a lot of other problems because it is an issue with the pituitary gland, and the fact that they often die young due to other complications, it seems weird that you would turn around his diagnosis to be all about you. Plus, Size isn't the deciding factor in a fight. Take a couple self defense classes, or join a martial art, and his being 8 feet or taller won't matter in the slightest.
Itsheragain 9
be ready to get walked on like an ant