Today, I came home from work. I was really tired and told my son that I would make him dinner later. He called the cops saying, "Mommy won't feed me." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
Today, I got home to my son with a bruised face and my daughter locked in her room. Apparently, when she got home from work, her unemployed brother asked her when she was going to cook dinner, so she punched him in the head. He’s so entitled that he actually thought he’d get sympathy from me. FML
Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML
Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML
Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML
Today, at midnight, I heard my son calling for his mom. I stopped by his room and asked him what was wrong? He didn't tell me. Instead, he said: "Oh, I don't need you." FML
Today, my sister in law threatened to call CPS on me because I “starved” her children when they spent the night. I didn’t starve them. I made an actual home cooked meal instead of the microwaveable or fast food crap she constantly feeds them. They chose not to eat and threw tantrums instead. FML
Today, I was making dinner for my family while my wife was at work. She walked in the door with McDonald's, even though she knew I was cooking. Then our kids saw and started screaming that they wanted McDonald's too and that it was unfair. I've told her not to pull this shit and she won't listen. FML
Today, my mom tried to ground me. In the apartment that I own. Because I didn't eat enough of the dinner that I'd made. FML
Today, I helped a 6 year-old boy who was left alone at a store to get back home. The kid's parents were grateful, but my mother cussed me out and called me stupid for helping the kid. No good dead goes unpunished. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Spanking. That is all.
FirstBornUnicorn 0
Good. Now your son has you on a leash.
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Comments (71)
1221jamw 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Haha Udi for making him starve
1221jamw 11
First! I'm so cool 8-)
tyronnK 0
da only thang she did wrong wuz raisin a lazyazz kid. if the kidz old enough to call da cops he's old enough to make himself a sandwich or cereal
1221jamw 11
Is it really that hard to talk with any grammar at all?
legonut6 0
The grammar exists, but it's really poor.
h2opoloplaya 0
it's spelled sammich
megamandude455 10
18 you fail. you ain't first. YOU AINT NOTHIN!! YOU HEAR ME!?
littleteapot 21
61 isn't that smart
1221jamw 11
Do you have an IQ of four? I'm the same guy as number one. So yes, I am first. And, I am something.
MissLizWolf 8
Don't be such a grammar Nazi, not everyone has to write perfectly like you,/: I wrote like that in 7 th grade, but I'm sure I write pretty well now.(:
tyronnK 0
listen ppl I choose to write like this cuz it's quicker, diz is **** my life not a college essay damn get off my nutz
RedPillSucks 33
How is it quicker to write 'thang' rather than 'thing' or 'wuz' rather than 'was' ??? Grammar exists so people can have an easier time understanding each other. Bad grammar means everyone has to work harder to understand what you're trying to say.
NotYourOrdinary7 6
lmaooooo @ tyronnk He has a point though. You all are getting mad annoying with the corrections. Calm the hell down.
PowerSynopsis 0
He doesn't have a point. He's a moron. Redpillsucks, on the other hand, does have a point.
NotYourOrdinary7 6
And that is why we are all entitled to opinions. They both bring up valid points, however this isn't something that will reflect on your future. (resume, college essay, etc.) That being said, it's not as if whatever people have written on this site is not understandable.
diskdude13 0
Everyone should stfu :D See now everything is resolved!! :)
Azull_fml 8
No seriously. I hate it when people get mad at people like tyronn. The Internet (especially FML) shouldn't be strict on grammar or spelling as long as you can understand it (you'd have to be literally retarded if you can't understand tyronn). It's not like it's of high importance, now if he spoke or wrote like that in the real world....
tyronnK 0
haha redpillsucks just made my day haha dat brotha has a list of his fav FML ppl, datz when u kno u needa life
kisssit 0
tyronnK- You're the one creeping on his profile. Maybe YOU need a life.
sloppyflow 1
102 107 both got the points lol
PinkYellowBlue 0
agreed
stephanie0613 0
23 I was thinking the exact same thing! I can say the this app has honestly helped me in writing properly on the computer or itouch or whatever :) ha
mitchem 3
Everyone is missing the picture here. That was an extremely stupid-assed comment. My mom hasn't fed me in almost 2 years now. That's not because she's neglectful, but because I'm 18 years old and am living by myself at college, and even when I lived with her I wouldn't get fed the moment she got home. I'm not sure about you, but I have a job, and I really don't want to cook for myself, let alone a picky child, the moment I set foot in the house. Op, punishment should not be strictly, "what you did is bad. The end." Explain why that was bad to him. if he's too young to understand raise the phone up to where he can't get it easily.
login6437 0
111- you're the creeper having that picture on FML.
purplepunk 0
Does it really matter I mean its website no school
1221jamw 11
It matters because it's extremely annoying. You don't have to have perfect grammar but you should have at least some.
jcowsert2 5
83 u just sound lazy. actin like it's that much effort to read wat he wrote.
Melania890 9
You know, some people think you're lazy if you talk like 'lyke, shes a bad moter !' How hard is it to at least try to haves good grammar?
MelonLord1544 11
EVERYONE JUST STFU! STOP THIS FLAMEWAR NOW! ITS FML, NOT EXPRESS STUPIDITY! Anyways, I want you all to end this conversation and go back to browsing fmls like me. ;D
Coyotus 7
Must... resist... urge to express opinion.
doureallyneed2no 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Lazy ass mom
mitchem 3
Why don't you go work for 10 hours straight and see if you want to cook dinner for yourself and others. Then, when you are done with the dishes because your son is too young to help and cook his own dinner, you can hop on the computer and call this mom lazy.
FirstBornUnicorn 0
Good. Now your son has you on a leash.
trueblue42 4
your son is a spoiled brat
anonymous100000 17
raised your kid wrong. YDI.
surferchick96 0
*muffles laughter* xD
Hayman68 4
you are pretty
SxyDianosaurRAWR 0
38- you are a creeper
hashoahxxx 0
I'd kick his ******* ass
Haw_Haw 0
Someone's kid obviously wasn't taught proper discipline.
mike3775 39
after the cops left, I know a kid who wouldn't be able to sit down for awhile
catatonicsleep 17
then he might phone again with "mommy hit me" since he thinks this is the way to react after mommy does something he doesn't like....
mike3775 39
My kids tried that once, the police simply left andtold the kid if he calls again, they will take him to Juvi for wasting the police time. My kids never tried that stunt again
doll_face89 0
lol should have bought something on your way home works all the time
LeoFML 1
I'm really superficial.
Fortuitous 0
Well, child starvation is a very serious problem and leads to various diseases, particularly Developed Blancotitis, which was discovered when Justin Bieber became a famous prick.
ViiciousDreamz 0
I thought it was called deepthroatitis
BackHurts 0
Its actually called BieberFiever. I feel so sorry for the kids that have it.
DocBastard 40
Spanking. That is all.
Matt_192 6
Indeed.
SCBeauty1983 0
Agreed
shacoria 0
Your son should be your first priority. If the boy was hungry and you let him starve, then that's neglect and you should go to prison and have your son taken away. That boy needs to be with a mom who actually loves him and will take care of him. It's all for the best. You don't deserve a child.
Farion 7
Oh boo hoo she didn't feed him immediately, the kid should learn to make his own damn food if he's hungry.
saint_jimmy 0
I agree that her son should be the first priority and she should've just found the energy to fix him a quick dinner, she doesn't deserve to go to prison because this is nothing like neglect or child starvation. Making your son dinner an hour and a half late, while irresponsible, is not a crime nor should it be treated like one.
Matt_192 6
But she was tired. And It's not like she said "I'll feed you tomorrow or whenever I feel like it", she just probably wanted to sit for a little while first. Guess that makes her a horrible mother, and puts her down there with ones that abuse and neglect their children :|
TomPusslicker 21
@11...this is the dumbest response ive read in a long time. You know nothing. Its not like op hadnt fed the kid in days, she simply said she would make dinner later....no child is gonna starve in an hour or so. its not neglect. when you were growing up, did your mom drop everything and tend to your every request immediately? did you have a lead-based pacifier as a child?
mg211 0
I can't tell if your a guy or a girl I was lookin at your profile picture for a few minutes and have come to this conclusion: your either a really ugly girl or a gay guy. idk which maybe you can let me know
manbizzle 1
lmao @68.
mznina_1 0
you are obviously very young and dont have children.
heynow00wellthen 0
A few minutes or even a few hours wouldn't starve him, in the literal sense of the word. He would have been hungry, yes, but in no way starving. It takes about five or six days of absolutely no food to be certifiably starving. She's not a horrible mother for wanting a quick rest. =P
legonut6 0
You can get a certificate for starving?!
heynow00wellthen 0
49, you're legit as hell since you listen to Sublime.
iknowwhatimsayin 0
haha nice (I hope ur joking ;)
iknowwhatimsayin 0
yeah!!
heynow00wellthen 0
legonut...I reeeaally hope you're joking. :)
markhansen1992 5
ur a dumb ass idiot
crzyck83 0
Harsh much? The boy wasn't going to starve. She even told him she'd make his dinner later. Maybe it wasn't time for dinner. He needs to learn a thing called patience. If he's old enough to call the police & tell them he's not being fed, he's old enough to understand that she will feed him later.
allmighty619 0
ha or not...she said later meaning she wanted to rest its not neglect ydi if you can't understand that
bigsc 0
I believe you should be shot. That is all
greenday96 0
oh shut the **** up its a ******* little kid let the ******** wait until shes ready. the woman probably had a hard day at work give her some ******* rest. you should go to jail for being so ******* retarded
5t3ff1k4h 47
146 - What a ******* mouth on you. ****.
AddyMilla 0
are you kidding? clearly the boy was just being a brat! rest momma!
cjames10 4
**** you
Chelseam2 4
That's really stupid. The mom was gonna make it later. The same night, but not right then. Do you even have a job? I do, and I can hardly keep my eyes open when I get home.She needs rest Also, I heard of a boy who called the cops on his Mom for a dumb reason. They gave him to a family who raped him.