Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

reapr03

Offline (12 hours ago) | Search for a member

reapr03

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2122
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

reapr03's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 8:08am

reapr03's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of reapr03's badges

reapr03's favorite FMLs

Today, I snuck downstairs to watch a midnight movie. One moment I'm trying to plug my headphones in, in the dark, and the next my dad's beating the shit out of me with a baseball bat. Turns out he snuck down after me for a midnight snack and thought I was a burglar disconnecting the TV. FML

#21399867
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25457) - you deserved it (3685)

On 04/26/2015 at 6:05am - health - by Anonymous (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML

#21399850
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24712) - you deserved it (2355)

On 04/26/2015 at 4:19am - love - by fuck you (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend having phone sex less than 10 feet away from me. FML

#21399833
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24610) - you deserved it (1883)

On 04/26/2015 at 3:09am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was watching porn, and ended up bawling because the girl in the video looked like my ex. FML

#21399752
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23626) - you deserved it (6950)

On 04/26/2015 at 12:05am - intimacy - by montanadinosaur (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

#21399578
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24198) - you deserved it (2665)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:42pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for public sex. FML

#21399557
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30398) - you deserved it (2189)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm - love - by RBergman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "God" told her to. I guess "God" didn't have any problems with me buying dinner first. FML

#21399506
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23839) - you deserved it (1896)

On 04/25/2015 at 1:55pm - love - by wil - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I orgasmed in front of someone for the first time. Too bad it was my dad who didn't knock before coming in. FML

#21399489
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26634) - you deserved it (4102)

On 04/25/2015 at 1:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boss asked if I could spare a few minutes to finish off the last of his paperwork backlog. I'm pretty desperate for a raise, so I said sure. Turns out the "small", "should-take-a-few-minutes" backlog consists of 3 desk-high stacks of documents. Goodbye, cruel world. FML

#21399405
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23098) - you deserved it (2242)

On 04/25/2015 at 8:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25835) - you deserved it (2097)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she'd leave me for her ex in a heartbeat. Tomorrow is, or should I say "was", our wedding day. FML

#21399347
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28730) - you deserved it (1669)

On 04/25/2015 at 3:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I found out the name on my driver's license is incorrect. I don't know what's worse: the fact the government can't even copy a goddamn name correctly, or that it took me three months to notice, when a cop nearly arrested me for carrying a "fake" license. FML

#21399342
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24664) - you deserved it (3775)

On 04/25/2015 at 3:30am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my little sister filled the huge house I spent over a week building in Minecraft with TNT. She then demanded I give her all the money in my wallet, or she'd blow it all up. She's now $86.25 richer, and my parents think it's too hilarious to make her give me my money back. FML

#21399271
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21813) - you deserved it (18658)

On 04/24/2015 at 11:23pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while getting ice cream with a friend, her car got broken into. Nothing was taken except my backpack, which contained assignments making up 50% or more for grades in four separate classes. FML

#21399187
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26894) - you deserved it (2205)

On 04/24/2015 at 7:58pm - misc - by Caroline1812 (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was staying at my boyfriend's house while he was at work, and put on his pants to make some tea. As I took my hot tea and laptop upstairs, the pants slowly started to fall down. I had to keep climbing with my pants around my knees, and shuffle awkwardly past my boyfriend's father. FML

#21399154
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21848) - you deserved it (6959)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:38pm - misc - by Bullet4MyChemaMo - Ireland (Cork)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2: School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: