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bookieworm

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bookieworm

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 5997
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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bookieworm's page activity

Visits<b>mcadminrotmg</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 10:23am<b>bakemono</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 12:17am<b>LonelyAtHeart</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 11:21pm

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bookieworm's favorite FMLs

Today, my pet bunny died. My little sister is distraught and practically suicidal, because apparently she playfully pointed a wand at it a few days ago and said "avada kedavra". She's absolutely convinced that she killed it. FML

#21315060
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34989) - you deserved it (2818)

On 12/10/2014 at 2:58pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my husband sent me a link to an article titled "5 ways you are unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage." FML

Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML

#21315008
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37705) - you deserved it (4033)

On 12/10/2014 at 1:16pm - intimacy - by unlovedandunfucked (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found a very light blonde long hair on my marital bed's pillow. I confronted my husband about it and after hours of arguments and me throwing his stuff out of the house, I found another. Attached to my head. My husband isn't having an affair, I'm just going grey. FML

#21314908
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18219) - you deserved it (41383)

On 12/10/2014 at 7:59am - love - by mastel07 (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my daughter wasn't feeling well, so we allowed her to sleep in bed with us. She snuggled right up with my husband. I felt a little jealous until she turned around and cuddled with me, just long enough to throw up all over me. She then flipped back over and snuggled with her dad. FML

#21314569
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33648) - you deserved it (3621)

On 12/09/2014 at 5:39pm - kids - by SickMaMa - United States (New York)

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

#21314442
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33549) - you deserved it (5687)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, while fasting for a medical test, my blood sugar became so low that I had heart palpitations and passed out. My doctor's advice? Fast, so he can run more tests. FML

#21314271
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29201) - you deserved it (2413)

On 12/09/2014 at 4:39am - health - by fucking moron (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom texted me and asked what I was up to. In response, I joked, "Dancing on the dining room table, waving dad's Calvin Klein's in the air, and shooting bullets into her bedroom floor." Not only did the cops show up, but now I'm grounded for two weeks for being, "deceptively believable." FML

#21314000
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31807) - you deserved it (5383)

On 12/08/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by #goodbyelife - United States

Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML

#21313388
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38858) - you deserved it (4652)

On 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm - misc - by pubemilkshake - United States (Utah)

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

#21313211
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40161) - you deserved it (4134)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm - kids - by terdberglerforlyfe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML

#21313160
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39774) - you deserved it (3384)

On 12/07/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML

#21312925
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31644) - you deserved it (6434)

On 12/07/2014 at 1:15am - misc - by Gassy and sassy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I felt bad about rarely complimenting my mom about her cooking, so during dinner, I raved about her incredible, creamy, macaroni and cheese. It came from a box. FML

#21312880
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27986) - you deserved it (7651)

On 12/06/2014 at 11:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

#21312768
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42348) - you deserved it (2669)

On 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML

#21312671
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33733) - you deserved it (3360)

On 12/06/2014 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium



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