DDCA

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DDCA

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7129
  • Number of comments : 248
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About DDCA : This person has completed their profile.

DDCA's page activity

Visits<b>NoOrdinaryNZer</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 8:41am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 11:07pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:15pm<b>sgtsnipes3094</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:29pm<b>slouie</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 4:23pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 2:15pm<b>ucoolgirl31</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 12:52am<b>AngelApocalypse</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 11:52am<b>princessEll</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 10:10am<b>Mad_Or_Nah</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 7:23am<b>PeterPanties</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:55am<b>tialeanne</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:10am<b>tifdunc</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 11:21am<b>jrod9327</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 9:37am<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 7:13pm<b>jordann_27</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 9:57pm<b>blu8</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 11:02am<b>BrittyHope</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 11:19pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:15pm

DDCA's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of DDCA's badges

DDCA's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 2:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I came home from a relaxing, peaceful vacation. When I got home my 4-year-old son was free-balling with poop all over his body, screaming "Bob the Builder will kick your ass." The baby sitter is nowhere to be found and I can't get him to stop saying, "I love ass." FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 4:00am / United States (California) / Holidays

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. I was woken up by my mother breaking into my house to tell me I need to get ready for work. Then she got mad that I had a girl over. I'm 20. FML

by holycommander / 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my husband that a guy I work with told me that I'm the most beautiful woman he has ever met. My husband replied, "He needs to get out more." FML

by Candycane88 / 03/26/2013 at 10:12am / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that what my husband meant by "we should try swinging" is "I really want to have sex with this one friend of yours, and if you so much as make eye contact with any guy I'm going to totally flip out and threaten to kill him and you." FML

by SwinginSolo / 03/26/2013 at 8:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

by anon / 03/25/2013 at 2:31pm / United States / Health

Today, my guinea pig was resting on my shoulder. However, I forgot to tie my hair up and she gnawed off a clump of it that was a good 6 inches long. I had to fight her to get it out of her mouth. FML

Today, I gave my son a fork, so I could try teaching him how to eat with one. So far, he's been doing all the teaching. He's taught me that if I get anywhere near him when he has a fork, I'll get shanked. FML

Today, I spent three hours painstakingly installing and configuring some parental control software on my 11-year-old son's laptop after I caught him watching porn. Barely an hour after returning the laptop, I caught him watching yet more porn on it. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2013 at 6:30am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML

by whatchagonnado / 03/24/2013 at 3:35am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I was complaining to my husband about a busty but vapid celebrity, and he replied, "She doesn't need brains, honey, she has boobs. You wouldn't understand." FML

by Beestings / 03/24/2013 at 1:14am / United States / Love

Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2013 at 7:47pm / United States / Kids

Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML

by Hurrikhan / 03/23/2013 at 7:43am / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML

by meeee / 03/21/2013 at 6:01am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I returned from a 5-day cruise for my senior spring break, filled with gorgeous sorority girls from all over the country. I was seasick the whole time. FML

by captainlame / 03/21/2013 at 1:59am / United States / Miscellaneous