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DDCA's favorite FMLs
by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
Today, I took my 15 year old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML
by John / 08/22/2009 at 1:05am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML
by Anonymous / 08/11/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/01/2009 at 3:08pm / United States / Love
Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML
by foolishgirl / 02/25/2009 at 1:41pm / United States (New York) / Work
- Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his… Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her… Today, I took advantage of the fact that my wife was sleeping to watch a porn film on my computer.…