About DDCA : This person has completed their profile.
DDCA's FML badges
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
DDCA's favorite FMLs
by fack / 11/26/2013 at 1:35pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by jazopalchris / 11/25/2013 at 6:42pm / Australia (South Australia) / Kids
by sister sister / 11/25/2013 at 12:38pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML
by I hate that game / 11/23/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous
by meesmees / 11/23/2013 at 5:48am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I swallowed and nearly choked to death on the ring my boyfriend hid in my wine glass. It's still in me somewhere, and my doctor basically told me that I'll have to "keep an eye on things" if I want to find it. FML
by fecal romance / 11/23/2013 at 5:32am / United States (Arizona) / Love
by clodius / 11/20/2013 at 1:25pm / United Kingdom (North Lanarkshire) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/19/2013 at 8:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals
by Trapped. / 11/05/2013 at 9:53pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
by :/ / 11/05/2013 at 4:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML
by PapaW / 11/01/2013 at 3:01am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/31/2013 at 4:42pm / United Kingdom (Leicester) / Health
Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML
by Rinelric1998 / 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
by BaconLover / 10/28/2013 at 12:58am / Japan / Love
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today my mom, bored lover of games and mysteries, bragged about outsmarting scammers by burning all…
- Today, I found out that if my son and daughter in law are mad at me, they do it on my furniture. So… Today, I was watching a movie with my parents when a sex scene came on. As if that wasn't awkward… Today, I was on the bus when I felt a big yawn coming on, one so big that my mouth stretched and my…
- Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, at lunch, my seven-year-old daughter and I had a chat. I asked her if she had a sweetheart.… Today, I’m in China for work. All my work is stored in my Google Drive, directly via the internet.…