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Brilliant66star's favorite FMLs
by sakurabloom / 05/04/2016 at 4:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by claustrophobic / 05/04/2016 at 3:03pm / United States (Maryland) / Work
by unmarried / 05/03/2016 at 8:39pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/03/2016 at 5:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Love
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, because her military father, who doesn't like me, continuously threatened my safety for dating her. Now he's threatening to kill me for dumping her. I can't win. FML
by send the army please / 05/02/2016 at 2:51am / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, my boyfriend keeps requesting that I make eye contact when I give him blowjobs. He won't let up about it. I don't know how to break it to him that his penis is too small for me to suck and look upward at the same time. FML
by oh gee / 05/02/2016 at 1:01am / Intimacy
by Mrmz07 / 05/01/2016 at 5:32am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by ShouldICallYouDaddy / 04/30/2016 at 7:49am / United Kingdom (Lincolnshire) / Intimacy
Today, I gave my boss a report I wrote on my own time, full of suggestions on how to increase productivity and profits at our company. He said my ideas made "about as much sense as pistol-whipping a ghost" and that I was impressing no-one. FML
by Anonymous / 04/29/2016 at 9:09pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, my husband and his best mate got drunk and decided it would be a good idea to try hitchhike naked for a joke. Although no one was willing to pick up two naked 28 year old-men off the side of the main road, someone did call the cops. They are being held overnight. FML
by Anonymous / 04/29/2016 at 5:17am / New Zealand / Miscellaneous
Today, as I was taking a shower, I felt something run down my back. Assuming it was water, I lathered up my loofah and scrubbed my back with it, only to hear a gross crunching sound. I pulled back my loofah to see a smushed, twitching cockroach that I had smeared on my back. FML
by kittywings / 04/28/2016 at 9:14pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals
by filipkm / 04/28/2016 at 6:04pm / Slovenia (Ljubljana Urban Commune) / Miscellaneous
by AintEasyBeinWheezy / 04/28/2016 at 2:26pm / United States / Health
Today, I went to the dentist; no one was in the waiting room so I danced around and mouthed songs that were on the radio. It wasn't till after I went to the counter and saw the receptionists laughing like a pack of hyenas that I realized there was a camera. FML
by shit / 04/28/2016 at 7:05am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by MrDanito / 04/28/2016 at 2:21am / Czech Republic (Stredocesky kraj) / Intimacy