The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year

The all-time greatest FMLs

The other shoe will drop

By Anonymous - 04/03/2026 03:00

Today, I survived the last round of layoffs. What didn't survive is my team, my manager, and my tasks. Now I'm "reporting" to a VP who used to be three levels above me and has never heard of me. I'm waiting for HR to wake up and realize that this change literally means I get six figures for doing nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 107

Scammers scamming

By Anonymous - 30/04/2021 07:49

Today, I got a call from my bank, saying that the cheque I deposited in my account bounced and my account is now -$2900. The cheque was from a work-at-home company, who asked me to deposit the cheque, then send them some of the money through Cash App to buy office supplies. They won’t answer their e-mails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 2 865

Get back here

By Dog the bounty hunter - 11/07/2025 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my dog somehow figured out how to open the sliding glass door while I was taking a nap. I woke up to a text from my neighbor, saying, “Your damn dog is running around at the park annoying a bunch of strangers for food. You might want to come and grab her.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 175

How the turntables turn

By PoorAndBroke - 12/09/2021 14:01

Today, I went to see a house for rent. The owner ended up being a person whom I denied renting to a long time ago, because I thought she was sketchy looking. Apparently she’s the CEO of a company now. She definitely recognized me and kicked me off the premises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 1 452

Lemon

By MVHIGH - 16/04/2026 22:00 - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, I’ve realized I have paid $1700 on repairs for a vehicle that I’ve only have had for six months. I traded in my previous vehicle to avoid this problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 69

Pissed off

By Anonymous - 16/04/2024 22:00 - France - Laval

Today, I'd thought I was somewhat friends with a girl, the only person I actually talked to outside of school, but after overhearing a discussion I think she may actually have restricted me on Instagram, because I've "always pissed me off anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 107

Punk rumble

By Not Even Chinese - 02/11/2025 22:00

Today, three teenage punks harassed me spewing made up Chinese. They might've scored a bingo, because a group of royally pissed off Chinese men came and attacked them. The cops arrived and took them, and me, not believing that I wasn't with them. Their evidence: one of punk's phones shows one of them consoling me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 72

Wait til he finds out about the Wonderbra

By Fattie - 14/11/2023 20:00

Today, I was getting ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. I wear shapewear shorts to keep my FUPA and thighs under control, so when I removed those, he recoiled and said, “Fuck that shit, what happened to your body?” He promptly dumped me for “catfishing” him and told me to leave his house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 689

Classic confusion

By Anonymous - 28/11/2023 05:00

Today, while I was shaving my nose started to itch. Guess which I shaved and which I itched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 202

Healthy lifestyle

By Jennette - 11/10/2025 03:00

Today, I went for my first morning run in years. I made it half a block before tripping over nothing and face-planting in front of a dog walker. The dog looked genuinely concerned. The walker didn’t. She just snorted and carried on walking the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 115

Lullaby

By Anonymous - 04/10/2024 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, and every day for the last ten days, I’ve woken up in the morning and found another new spider somewhere in my room, ten days in a row. I don’t know where the bastards are coming from but I’m seriously considering sleeping in another room, or buying a new house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 107

Chillin' with Satan

By Anonymous - 06/12/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I sat down on my couch with a nice cool beer after a tough day at work. I tried opening a bag of chips. The bag exploded, covering me in chips and crumbs, turning me into a sticky human nacho. Well, my dog certainly saw me as a snack, and I had to shower and change clothes. So much for relaxing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 166

Garden wars

By Anonymous - 21/04/2024 14:00 - Germany

Today, my mom’s house and mine share the same garden. After I complained about an ugly compost bin she had outside my bedroom window, she finally took it away and put it… smack dab in front of my terrace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 166

Time for an episode of Intervention

By Anonymous - 19/03/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - Saint Ives

Today, my brother won't fucking stop playing Minecraft whilst on the phone, when we're chatting. All I hear is him playing Minecraft. Every time. He's in university, I'm not even there yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 154

Thanks, I think?

By OT's Mom - 14/09/2024 20:00 - Australia

Today, my toddler gave me a compliment. She said, "Mommy, you’re so pretty... when the lights are off." FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 95

Digging for gold

By PUKEATRONIC BARF-O-MATIC SPEWORAMA - 17/02/2026 12:00

Today, after a bad head cold, my boyfriend woke up, shambled to the bathroom and sniffled. He then pulled the biggest booger I've ever seen out of his nose; it looked like a giant slug. He took a picture, then set it as his lock screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 78

Scammers gonna scam

By Anonymous - 16/06/2021 21:59

Today, after feeling lost and sad for a long time, in a last attempt to get some answers, I'd saved up and flew to see a very famous clairvoyant. For the whole session, all she talked about was how great and successful my brother is going to be. $250 down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 1 743

Fix me up

By Anonymous - 22/07/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I realized thanks to two injuries I have that I can't do two routines my doctor wants me to do. I strained something in my right hip so squatting causes me pain. Jogging is also out of the question because my right foot healed wrong when I sprained it, and requires pricey foot surgery to fix. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 92

Sniffer dog

By Anonymous - 08/08/2022 18:00

Today, after a guy I really liked and we decided to have sex, and he gagged and told me I stank when he got 'down there', I broke up with him, badly, but it's now a week later and I’m in hospital with a severe infection down there. He was right, and now he won’t take me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 2 155

Nervous laughing

By Anonymous - 18/11/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my parents and I were looking for something using the TV's search bar. Despite never, ever watching anything resembling porn, one of the default search options was, "Hot female Asian sex videos." Thank God they have an excellent sense of humor, as they laughed their heads off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 102

What is he hiding?

By Wtf - 04/10/2025 20:00

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he had any secret sexual fantasies and promised that I wouldn't judge him, hoping to scratch my kinky itch. He looked at me wide-eyed, yelled, "IT'S A TRAP!!" and literally sprinted out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 262

Relax

By Anonymous - 05/03/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I was craving some comfort food, so I grabbed a bag of nachos from the cupboard and sat down to binge-watch Netflix. As I opened the bag, the chips exploded everywhere, spilling all over the couch, and floor. I spent the next half hour picking up crumbs while my dog and cats happily ate the scraps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 156

By sistermonster - 26/02/2014 09:45 - France - Salon-de-provence

Today, my boss fired me. I can't really explain the slap I gave him for it, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 209

Tease

By Blue balls forever - 20/10/2025 20:00

Today, my fiancee told me she felt horny and was excited for bed, then got mad when I seemed indifferent. I'd be more interested if she didn't constantly wind me up by talking about sex, then get cold feet the second we're alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 83

Performance art

By Christine - 09/04/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I was in a video call with my boss when my Wi-Fi decided to take a vacation. I thought I could salvage the situation by using my iPhone’s hotspot. But then my phone ran out of data mid-sentence, and my boss got a glimpse of me cursing at my phone while frantically waving it in the air. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 119

Crunchy

By Anonymous - 07/08/2024 12:00 - Denmark - Randers

Today, I made a smoothie with all the healthy ingredients I could find. As I took my first sip, I realized too late that I had accidentally blended in a dead fly that had fallen into the blender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 167

Don't do it

By Anonymous - 12/04/2024 14:00 - United States - Coventry

Today, I finally caved and told a friend about my suicide note. She demanded that I promise I wouldn't follow through, but how could I when I was writing it no more than a few minutes before I joined a call with her? The funny thing is, most of that note was me trying to comfort my friends and family for when I'm gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 247

Punch the information in

By Anonymous - 27/01/2023 10:00

Today, I found my daughter punching her brother repeatedly. Apparently, he'd put the wrong fuel in her van so after 20 years of him being a moron, she decided to beat the stupid out of him. Thing is it’s worked; he’s too bruised and scared of her to do anything, period, just in case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 750

Counterproductive?

By Anonymous - 03/12/2025 12:00

Today, I decided to be productive and clean behind my couch. I found dust, old receipts, and one sock I thought was stolen by the universe. When I stood up proudly, I smashed my head on the shelf above. I knocked down three picture frames. All shattered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 98

Trapped

By FamilyIsTheBest - 11/03/2026 20:00

Today, I am forced to throw a baby shower for my entitled and witch of a sister in law. She and her husband have been making my life living hell for more than 10 years now. What their hellspawn would do, God only knows. No, I can't walk away. It's a cultural thing. I'm trapped until death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 143

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Embarrassing Coworkers Smells Work Miscellaneous Family Funerals Awkward Money Food Health Kids Friends Love Transportation Cheating Intimacy NSFW Sex Frustration Teachers Relatable Parents Instagram I need your advice Ghosting Social Media Weddings Weird Crush

The Top

Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last two miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 984

You deserved it 5 712

Today, due to the cold, windy weather, I decided to wear my brand-new cute (and expensive) jacket that has a faux-fur hood. As I walked down the street, numerous PETA members attacked me with red liquid. I'm a Vegan and an animal-rights activist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 967

You deserved it 25 051

Random

Today, I had to take my daughter home from school because she had been caught flashing the boys during class. I tried to explain to her that it wasn't an appropriate way to act or behave but she interrupted me, "Mom, you don't even understand." You're right. I don't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 400

You deserved it 6 959

Today, I asked my mother why she had me in the first place, as we never get along. She replied because my father wanted me. So, I called my father to ask him the same question, he said he only wanted to have me to keep my mother around, and that didn't work, so I was a waste. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 985

You deserved it 4 556

Today, a package has been sitting at the post office for two weeks, with a status update of "Arriving Late." I've finally been told the package is most likely lost in a sorting bin, and won't arrive before Christmas. It was a custom-made, commissioned Christmas gift, that took two months to even complete, and can't be replaced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 036

You deserved it 100

Today, I was driving when a couple flipped the bird on me before cutting me off, so I flipped them off back. After they'd got away, another driver thought I'd actually been flipping him off and followed me into a parking lot. This guy was huge, and let’s just say he didn’t give me a chance to explain myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 363

Today, after spending two days pampering my sick fiancee and her sick son, they were finally feeling better. I woke up feeling rotten and said I needed to rest. She said, "Okay, but I want to deep clean today. Let's go! Out of bed! Up up!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 575

You deserved it 96

Today, my mom called me a bastard because I asked for the Target gift card my dad had given to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 85