Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, we had to re-live sex ed in my college biology class. Unlike in middle school, nobody giggled incessantly. However, the guy sitting next to me stared at me intensely for nearly the whole three hour lecture. FML
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated, "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML
Today, one of my preschool students hit me in the nuts in front of my whole class. If that wasn't bad enough, the blow to my crotch instantly triggered a very audible fart. FML
Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML
Today, I still get irrationally angry and distracted when my teacher refers to bodily functions as “poop, pee, number 1 & 2, etc.” and calls things icky. I’m literally in nursing school with an instructor who talks like Elmo. FML
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML
Today, my teacher was giving a lecture about human genetics and how they are passed on to children. She projected a large picture of a baby on to the screen in the front of the room. I then joked about how this ugly baby must have some very unattractive parents. It was her baby. FML
Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML
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Top comments
LadyGore 12
******!
Jchicas 0
this was the only comment needed for this post
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Comments (255)
glittercookies 12
You're not curious or interested in knowing about your own body and human nature?
coopdaddy267 5
Dick pussy
s15c 9
*twitch*
coldashell 23
Penis penis penis. ****** ****** ******.
hellbilly205 17
*seziure*
WaylonD 4
Awesome Varsity Blues reference! I was goin to say the same thing!!!
MandyMeow_fml 18
It sounds like you need to grow up, and be more mature about these things. They are just body parts like your leg or arm.
EvilLilCupcake 10
*twitch*
AmongstTheFaces 5
Seems like he has a case of being a little bitch and needs a heavy dose of man the **** up!
zingline89 18
Well, mine is like a leg or arm, OP's may be like a finger.
esines 9
Dammit zingline you beat me to it
benmec 18
Don't worry. I once had to read out load to my 8th grade class about the male reproductive system. The teacher warned the class to be courteous & show some maturity. They did. I got up there & giggled my ass off every time I had to say testicles.
friisen_ 0
Blow your load it read out loud?
IKeepThemHairy 2
Testicles E S T I C L E S
benmec 18
Yes. I meant to sound British... ;)
Typholsion 4
*twitch*
Conasaur 8
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH GIGGLE GIGGLE LAUGH LAUGH...um..testicles...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
callcopse 10
<helpful> If you want to sound British say 'bollocks'. That's a favourite British word.
bizarre_ftw 21
Twit (^that too)
HannahWho 8
You deserved that, in my opinion. Why would you tell your family about that. Of course they would heckle you about it. Keep stuff like that to yourself... and grow up a little.
longdislover 0
So im guessing your first time is going to be with a pocket pussy?
hellbilly205 17
*twitch* and really just cause he does'nt like the words does'nt mean OP cant have sex..
Pentium_4 27
no. but my name is thad castle
barleyguy 17
Haha sex and te penis and the ****** are all natural organs of the body of you are going to be grossed out at the mention of them you might as well twitch when you hear lung or heart. Sex is one of the most natural things in the world it's in my opinion, it's man kinds one true purpose to procreate
kez238 0
Just gonna throw it out there.. Sex isn't really an organ..
bubo_fml 10
But they do have sex in Oregon...(I should know...I had it there before!!)
tdawg4200 0
There is only one purpose to procreation. The making of babies. Oh and sex isn't an organ. Go pick up a book and learn something.
Shadow_Phantom 26
Honestly I can feel you there, OP. I kinda grimace when either are said/typed. FYL. I know sex is a beautiful, natural thing; hell, I do it all the time... I know the words are the proper terms, but I still don't like them.
Calyx_fml 21
How is it that a Satanist can be shy about the word penis? Satan is indulgence not impotent modesty. Better read LaVey again.
electrorange 13
Here's a prime example of a future 60 year old virgin.
Shadow_Phantom 26
So just because someone doesn't like the words makes them virgin material? Makes no sense.