Today, I overheard a couple talking behind me. She said, "You wanna know what's really scary?" He said, "the size of that guy? Yeah he's huge", to which she replied, "no, the scary thing is that's a chick." They weren't talking about me, but they sure were talking about my girlfriend. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of a certain plus-sized vocalist, to which she replied, "She's gorgeous!" I said, "That's great because you remind me a lot of her." Now she's not talking to me. FML
Today, I overheard my husband of 3 years talking to our boss, an attractive blonde. She was telling him that she couldn't believe he was with me. She thinks I'm fat and ugly and that he's hot. He said, "She's not that bad…" We work in the same store and she follows him around like a puppy. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was worried about being eaten by a whale while out kayaking on our holiday tour. I told her that she was way larger than whale food, and that it wouldn’t be interested in her. Now she is accusing me of trying to tell her "nicely" that she's fat. FML
Today, I walked over to join a group of friends and heard them talking about how hot some guy was but how ugly his sister was. I asked who they were talking about and there was an awkward silence, they hadn't realized I was there. Apparently, they were talking about my brother. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend talking to her friends, saying the most attractive guys are tall and dark-skinned. I'm about average height and pale. Uh-oh. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging about me to his friends, telling them I have a great smile, cute hair, and very perky tits. This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't both men. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that the girl he really likes sees me as a threat. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, it was insinuated that my only other female co-worker is seeing the guy I'm seeing. He bashes her all the time to me, too. Now, I wonder what he says about me, to her. FML
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Top comments
briedis 0
If you like her the way she is, what's the problem?
shananigans 0
Is it just me, or does anyone else REALLY wish people could post pictures with their FML submissions, because every time I see one of these "I was mistaken for someone of the opposite gender" I get really curious about what the person actually looks like...
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Comments (143)
amirn86 0
I second #14 I hope your gf didn't hear what they were saying too... lol
strangersdk 0
Are you in the closet? cuz....a girl has to be pretty huge for people to say that. Kudos for ignoring physical appearance.
fillmyheart028 0
...how is this F YOUR L? That's F your girlfriends L, right?
rinnychan 2
People in here are assholes, too. Ugly = Dump her? Willing to bet it's a largely male population here...
forthelulz_fml 0
Dude, it's not their fault you're dating Bigfoot.
RDMC20 0
Man, just crush them with your enormous fists.
DizzyDemon0 9
If ya like the big girls who cares..something about beauty in the eye of the something rather. big girls need lovin' too! seems appropriate to say right there.
patray_angel 0
I hate rude people. I know all of us are guilty at people watching and making comments. Who knows, maybe there have been times I have been too loud. Either way, that sucks that you heard that couple trash talking you and your girlfriend. I didn't vote though, because I am not sure if you were made at them being rude or if you are embarassed by your girlfriend.
alex_vik 0
#9 - I agree, some people just don't think when talking about someone behind their back. A couple girls the other day were sitting right behind me talking shit about me. I don't understand what makes them think people don't have ears.
jayfx 0
dude that sucks