Today, I was offered a position as a school crossing guard. I have a $200,000 degree in Economics from a top 20 University and was offered a position to hold a stop sign and wear a reflective vest. I was tempted to accept. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was offered a job that pays far more than I expected, being a high school senior. My parents decided they aren't letting me take the job, saying I should enjoy my childhood. They're also not paying for my college, which is why I was looking for work in the first place. FML
Today, I received a call from a top-rated university accepting me into the program of my dreams to begin my ultimate career. Two weeks ago, I accepted a permanent, full time and legally-binding job position in my depressive hometown because the school had previously rejected me. FML
Today, I finally got an offer for a salaried position with the company I've been working for as a contractor for the past two years. They offered less than what I make now, but hey, benefits! FML
Today, I was forced into accepting a "promotion" for a position that pays less than what I get right now. FML
Today, I had my first job interview since graduating from university. The person who interviewed me informed me that not using my degree after two years practically makes it null and void. I guess instead of being a financial advisor at the company, I could always be a janitor there. FML
Today, I got a better job offer out of the blue, more pay, less work. I informally accepted and handed my notice as legally required. They rescinded the job offer. I'm now unemployed at the end of hiring season. FML
Today, after quitting my job to take a very attractive position with a competitor, I was told the position was no longer being offered. I'm now on my way to file for unemployment. FML
Today, I finally got the call from HR telling me I passed the interview and will get a permanent position, doing the same job I already do. Then they continued to say that if I accept, my pay will be cut to match “other employees pay”. I barely make it on what they are paying me now. I also have a Master's degree. FML
Today, I was offered a job. It only took me a year and 17 interviews to get an offer, and I have a PhD. FML
Today, my company decided to give me a second role, since I’m "the best performing candidate.” When I turned it down, they asked me to work half-time instead. I quit. FML
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Top comments
hahahapunk 0
does the marginal benefit exceed the marginal cost?
allmidnighteyes 10
STOP SIGN. REFLECTIVE VEST. Why the hell not? You can do like, awesome little dances, and tell the kids, "Don't stop!" as they're crossing the road, and only hope a passerby will cry out, "BELIEEEVIN'!" Orrrr, you can be one of THOSE crossing guards, and spank kids with the stop sign when they're being naughty naughtyyy.
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Comments (108)
aaaaa2p 0
That sucks.
Jollie 0
yea fyl dude
SunlightVeins 0
Having a $200,000 doesn't actually entitle you to have only better opportunities than anyone else, just have more.
pooponyuou 0
I bet you have a music degree
pooponyuou 0
I bet you have a music degree
SadinSherman 16
It clearly says they have a degree in economics
Rouge_Plague 0
Lol, im sure you can find a better job
keally1234 0
I'm*
lizzzie_fml 0
Don't be so judgemental. It'd probably be a very rewarding job. And in this climate, a job is a job.
snowFML 0
Well, aren't you glad you went to college?
hahahapunk 0
does the marginal benefit exceed the marginal cost?
manningham 0
Well played sir
stormoftara 0
That's what I was going to say. You stole my line. In any case, perhaps he thinks there is something more useful he can do with his time. As we all know, the real cost of doing something is what you give up to do it.
hahahapunk 0
ma'am not sir :)
Anikaaaaa 31
I know it's like 6 years later, but marginal benefit should be equal to marginal cost to be profit maximising... just so you know.
niko27 0
We're in an economic global crisis. A job is a job,buddy. I work two, and one of them involved shoveling popcorn to a-hole customers all day, and Im in school majoring in a STEM field. Get over yourself.
FerrariCake 2
Most people don't know what STEM fields are. Some of us do... but most don't. Hang in there, keep shoveling popcorn for a-hole customers, it'll all be worth it soon when you have your STEM degree and can join those of us who comfortably ignore all the people who whine about being unemployed while they expect someone else to solve their problem for them.
kaleid0scopeEyes 0
Yeah, because all people who have degrees other than STEM are pretentious elitist assholes who cant function on their own. All of your comments are so bitter. If your life is going to be so great and successful and awesome with your never fail STEM degree, why are you here venting your petty frustrations on a random guy on a website that isn't supposed to be taken that seriously? Did the slurpee machine break down again? "OMG OP HOW DARE YOU BE THE SLIGHTEST BIT UPSET OR COMPLAIN ABOUT THIS!!!THAT MEANS YOU EXPECT EVERYTHING HANDED TO YOU!!!YOU ARE SUCH A HORRIBLE HUMAN BEING FOR POSTING A 3 SENTENCE QUIP ABOUT YOUR UNFORTUNATE JOB SEARCH ON FMYLIFE!!!" is the basic gist of most of these comments. Why are there so many bitter people commenting? Is the FML audience mostly angry fast food employees in their mid 20's who hate their lives?
werzal 5
I agree. I'd take it without a second thought! a job is a ******* job! This recession is shit! Take the bloody job and quit whining at least its an income!
allmidnighteyes 10
STOP SIGN. REFLECTIVE VEST. Why the hell not? You can do like, awesome little dances, and tell the kids, "Don't stop!" as they're crossing the road, and only hope a passerby will cry out, "BELIEEEVIN'!" Orrrr, you can be one of THOSE crossing guards, and spank kids with the stop sign when they're being naughty naughtyyy.
crap09 0
I love you. So much.
Sun_Kissed18 25
Creative :) I like how you think
metonymy 0
There are actually a lot of great songs that feature the word stop. Like the Spice Girls song! Or, there's always "STOP! Hammer time!"
werzal 5
This man is a self obsessed, over indulged, spoiled wanker. There would be other people out there that would take this job REGARDLESS of their qualification! **** offer it to me!!!
T_X_P 2
Oh noes....you'd have to do something "below you" for a few hours a day. Stop whining. That has to be one of the best "temp" jobs on earth to have while looking for something more substantial. The demands are practically nonexistent.