Today, I had an interview with IBM. For a week I did extensive research and preparation for the interview. At first the interview was going really well. I was hitting all the marks. Then just as a final casual question she asked with a smile "What does IBM stand for?". I didn't know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24560) - you totally deserved it (15628)
On 06/22/2009 at 11:34pm - work - by MrZhang (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
lol I don't even know what it stands for. that shouldn't mean shit.
#1 - On 06/23/2009 at 6:06am by StingRay1971
If you're applying for a job at IBM, you should know what their full name is. International Business Machines. If you didn't know that, then you didn't do nearly as much research as you claim.
#72 - On 06/23/2009 at 12:20pm by Kristoffer
I agree ... except it is International Business Machines Corporation. They (we) ask it at just about every interview - and tons of people get it wrong and still get hired.
#83 - On 06/23/2009 at 1:34pm by pwclacrosse
Imperfect But Marketable! Did you know HAL was derived from IBM just one letter less each character.
That HAL thing is a coincidence, according to Arthur C. Clarke, author of the novel.
#95 - On 06/23/2009 at 2:49pm by christopherlove
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
same here number 1, all i knew was that they had computers that were supposed to be top notch machines when i was in gradeschool, but they totally sucked balls, don't know if they've improved their shit or not, but idk. and #'s 97, 100, and 101... SHUT THE HELL UP!!! WHO CARES HOW OLD YOU CLAIM TO BE, CHANCES ARE YOU'RE ACTUALLY IN YOUR 30'S STILL LIVING IN THE BASEMENT OF YOUR MOM'S HOUSE AND SHE STILL PICKS OUT YOUR CLOTHES FOR THE NEXT DAY AND LAYS THEM OUT ON YOUR BED!!!! DO YOU SLEEP WITH A NIGHTLIGHT TOO!?!?!? and who the hell cares if you know what ibm stands for? i bet you don't know that laser is actually an acronym!!!
#102 - On 06/23/2009 at 3:41pm by brkn_hearted
HAL: Hardware Abstraction Layer.
I suppose I do feel bad for you for not knowing what IBM stood for; I mean I know what it is, but I'm a geek (I also know HP, which surprisingly most people don't know; and most people don't know where "Dell" comes from).
Anyhow, I'm not hear to brag that I know obscure terms; I work at CVS, and one of the first things I asked after getting hired was what it stood for (I was too lazy to check on my own). The boss didn't know but made a guess.
I ended up finding out the real answer from the reader's manual. (Consumer Value Store). I'd have been really screwed if he had done a test on me. But then again, IBM requires company knowledge since it's high tech; with CVS, no one cares.
It's like asking a Walmart employee what the "Wal" in Walmart is for. (The creator of the chain is named Sam Walton).
Arthur C. Clarke more directly addressed this issue in his book The Lost Worlds of 2001:
"As is clearly stated in the novel (Chapter 16), HAL stands for Heuristically programmed ALgorithmic computer. However, about once a week some character spots the fact that HAL is one letter ahead of IBM, and promptly assumes that Stanley and I were taking a crack at the estimable institution ... As it happened, IBM had given us a good deal of help, so we were quite embarrassed by this, and would have changed the name had we spotted the coincidence."
But good try....
OP - you should still be sweet, it's just one of those throw-away questions, and if you don't get the job over that, you probably weren't going to anyway. Bet you'll know for next time, eh??
#119 - On 06/23/2009 at 8:02pm by AUT_student
actually #102 i'm on an IBM laptop right now. it's one of the best companies. it can fall a million times and still be good as new. noob. and you seem to be exactly how you described the other person xD what a loser/hypocrite
Internationale Büro-Maschinen how the heck should anyone know
#2 - On 06/23/2009 at 6:08am by fatgothchick
Obviously the person interviewing does. Which is why they asked, which is why they work there, which is why the OP should've been smart enough to maybe look that up with everything else. Duhhhhhh
#18 - On 06/23/2009 at 6:49am by swiftynifty
they work there because they know what IBM means? nice. ill apply now!
its a superficial question that doesnt reflect anything on the persons ability to do the job. i do hate the bullshit in interviews these days, researching the company pfft. what a joke. it makes no difference to your job, and doesnt show how much you want it either, rather that you need to make up for your lack of skill with unimportant bullshit to make yourself sound better than you really are. oh sure, i cant actually do the job very well BUT i know everything about the company. right. how about you ask something relevent, fucking dumb cunts. unless of course hes applying to be the guy who does the company letterhead...
#57 - On 06/23/2009 at 10:43am by organisedchaos
They ask for the simple reason of they want to know the person did their homework. They want to know the person actually researched the company an d understands the company. If you don't know what the acronym stands for for a company you are working for you are showing you didn't dedicate your time. Its a simple weed out process. BTW you're insulting a major corporation. Who do you think knows what they are doing. You? or the Fortune 500. Hmm lets think. A random kid on Fmylife, OR.... The 15th largest company in the US. Think think think. Oh yes, I think IBM wins this one.
Let this be a lesson to everyone trying to apply to a corporate position. Know your shit. Everything, even the mundane. You aren't special to them and you need to make yourself special during that interview. You may think its silly and trivial to know when the company started, or what the name means, or how many employees work there, but to them? its a source of pride. If you can't show pride for a position you are applying to, then they won't hire you. It's simple.
#80 - On 06/23/2009 at 1:25pm by MonkeySpeaks
Hard to be proud of something you're not even involved with yet.
It's like... thinking you're a big man for having a crush on a hot girl. NO, you're a big man if she's actually your girlfriend.
MonkeySpeaks just because a company is a Fortune 500 member doesn't inherently mean they know what they are doing.
examples:
General Motors (Fortune #4)
Merrill Lynch (Fortune #30)
Fannie Mae & Freddie Mac (53 and 54 respectively)
IBM hasn't used 'International Business Machines' in their corporate branding for some time. The name itself fails to recognize a couple of IBM's major markets namely, consumer electronics and supercomputing.
As far as the rest of those interviewing techniques they are also flawed heuristics. Such questions prove only that the candidate prepared for standard business school inspired interviewing tactics. They do not prove out an actual skill of qualification.
#112 - On 06/23/2009 at 5:58pm by saint_cypher
@80 im pretty sure just because theyre a big company doesnt mean theyre above me, especially given theyve been around a good solid 73 years longer, and had time to establish themselves financially. unless of course your position in the global market is ...to you at least... some major factor in how right you are. in which case i guess we better hand over running the entire planet to bill gates, hes clearly going to just get everything right and the world will be perfect. because hey, hes rich, therefore his opinion > everyone elses.
let this be a lesson to everyone trying to apply to a corporate position. theyre stupid. they follow lame outdated business management protocol. if you want a job there, pretend to give a shit about them, because theyre self important morons, giving you an indication of how much they plan to overwork you to achieve their own goals. or maybe you could consider working somewhere smaller, for less money, but being able to actually live a fucking life at the same time.
#126 - On 06/23/2009 at 10:56pm by organisedchaos
Concur with #3.
Note to self: Include the point of figuring out the company's acronym definition into extensive research and preparation before interview.
I didn't know until I interned there... She was probably just trying to be clever to find a way to eliminate people. Go find a competitor!
It can mean several things :)
-Irish Medicines Board
-International Mission Board
-International Business Machines
hehe, don't worry, i looked it up on google. :P
#8 2 of the things you put don't even fit with the IBM acronym. they spell out IMB.
#37 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:08am by fmylifedotcomm
Little known fact: The Irish switch up the second and third words in all acronyms.
#41 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:36am by LordOfTheHobos
41 is not an idiot, they were obviously making a joke. I dont know how anyone could think they were being serious.
you sir(#52)..are the idiot..not 41.
Pretty sure you are the only one who didn't pick up on the joke there. good job :)
#78 - On 06/23/2009 at 1:12pm by DizzyDemon0
I thought he was serious. I assumed it was some translation issue from Gaelic for a few seconds before deciding that the Irish have probably been speaking English for quite some time now...
#86 - On 06/23/2009 at 1:50pm by threecardmonty
"I thought he was serious. I assumed it was some translation issue from Gaelic for a few seconds before deciding that the Irish have probably been speaking English for quite some time now..."
Grrrr. Nobody in Ireland calls it Gaelic... the term is Irish.
#99 - On 06/23/2009 at 3:15pm by drimpossible
Interviewing 101: Research the company you are trying to get a job with before the interview. Questions like this are commonplace, and I'm not too surprised it was asked, especially with a company that's been around as long as IBM. YDI.
#9 - On 06/23/2009 at 6:24am by blitzer_tidus
I agree... obviously your research wasn't quite as extensive as you claimed if it didn't even extend to learning the actual NAME of the corporation you'd like to work for. I think that's a perfectly logical question for them to ask. Did you at least make something up?
#98 - On 06/23/2009 at 3:12pm by RyeBreadBoy
iron bun machine? get ur ass muscles ripped! but make sure the next job u apply for u no wut the company name means.
#10 - On 06/23/2009 at 6:25am by TheAmazing
Lmao. Iron Bun Machine??
Yeah, awesome.
I have no idea what IBM means either & I live in Australia. Go figure.
#12 - On 06/23/2009 at 6:31am by BelindaTree
Isn't that one of the first things you're supposed to look up?
#14 - On 06/23/2009 at 6:38am by redbluegreen
That was my thought. Like, you want to work for a company and have no idea what it stands for? Fail. Why was that not the first thing you looked up in your "extensive research"?
#40 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:31am by genius_man16
YDI. It's a job at IBM, not Mcdonalds. I think you should know what their name stands for considering how well known and prestigious their company is.
I didn't know either. That's a damn good question to ask, though!
#20 - On 06/23/2009 at 7:03am by LocoChaz006
Tell them you are not sure but you think it had something to do with Nazis using their product to find jews. That will get you hired.
#21 - On 06/23/2009 at 7:06am by intrepid00
Is there no one else who thinks that the OP completely misunderstood the question and the interviewer was asking if he knew what they "stand for" as a company? This seems a lot more logical to me, but maybe not...
#22 - On 06/23/2009 at 7:10am by Insert_Wit_Here
I think that the interviewer was just what IBM stood for. There are a couple companies that do not actually have any meaning behind their initials. My mom for years worked for a company called PML, and that's just what it was. They used it as a question though for interviewers.
Great trick question though, but as clever as that sounds, I think the interviewer just wanted to trip up the OP. Sometimes they know when they're being faked out, and they like to see just how much effort was being put in for the job.
#23 - On 06/23/2009 at 7:14am by redbluegreen
The way he said she asked (threw it in at the last minute, casually, with a smile) shows she DEFINITELY meant the initials. This is classic interviewer strategy. Its a way of figuring out whether the person being interviewed honestly cares about that particular company, or is really just looking for a job anywhere. Theoretically, anyone honestly interested in working at IBM would know what IBM stands for.
#46 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:47am by ihatestupidppl
JarJarBinks (#24): Knowing what the initials stand for shows that you're actually interested in the company, not just the money they can give you. No company is going to hire someone who is gonna use them to get their foot in the door them dump them for a higher paying job less than a year later. If you can't be bothered to know what their full name is, it makes you look like you couldn't care less about where you work as long as it pays.
If you think about it, it would be the equivalent of having a friend named "Sam" and not knowing whether her full name is "Samantha" or "Samara". Not knowing her name means you're not much of a friend, and not knowing a company's name means you're not the best candidate for the job.
#47 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:51am by ihatestupidppl
IBM didn't stand for anything for anything when they were first a business but then the government refused to give them a contract unless they told them what it stood for. At least that's what the tour guide at the computer museum in silicon valley said
#55 - On 06/23/2009 at 10:31am by musicfanboy33
I've never interviewed at IBM but I know they ask that question, I thought it was a pretty well known trick question. At least you got an interview at IBM, that's pretty impressive in itself
As a former IBM'er, you don't want to work at IBM, unless you have a thick skin for lies, corporate bullshit, and enjoy working in a political minefield.
wow I guessed "International Business Machine" then I looked it up on Google and ... yeah. I was right
#36 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:03am by were_giraffe
I always thought IBM meant "Irritable Bowel Movement" but then I had to question why there would be a job for that.
I knew it was the company,
But I couldn't believe no one said that yet.
So props to you, haha.
#56 - On 06/23/2009 at 10:38am by FrankieTheNimrod
haha #38. Anyways, that sucks however if you were doing that much research surely you should have come across that. Who knows they might let you in as hitting all the other points were probably very impressive.
#39 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:26am by Alexgoesfml
Haha I would've been screwed if I had that interview.
#42 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:37am by drinkupgorgeous
I hope you thought on your feet, you could have played that one off easily and made yourself look good. "You know, I've been doing my research on this company all week and I know the ins and outs of the company and yet I never thought to look into that!"
It shows how much research and effort you made while jokingly passing by answering.
Not really, that just shows even more how much of a fucktard the person applying for the job is. It's like saying: I did all my homework, but I'm still stupid enough I forgot this part!
Come on!! Asking a nerd what IBM means is like asking a fat chick what KFC stands for. It should just flow. YDI!!!
#48 - On 06/23/2009 at 9:56am by dreadedone
actually, none of you are right. IBM is named after HAL, the crazy computer from Space Odyssey. IBM are all one letter different than HAL: H-I, A-B, L-M. Duh
lol
#50 - On 06/23/2009 at 10:08am by JoeBen
I seriously doubt they wouldn't hire you on that one answer if the rest of the interview went well.
I admire your honest answer. Gotta hope they do too.
To soon to tell if it's a FML.
YDI. If you're interviewing there, you need to know that kind of stuff.
#58 - On 06/23/2009 at 10:43am by deaditegirl
@ #6: from your rant it's clear you're immature. Obviously the point of asking what IBM stands for is that the interviewee knows enough about a company's history that they prove they have an understanding of where a company came from, and then hopefully an idea of where the company is headed.
As a note, I do not work for IBM, but I think this is probably common knowledge to most people: IBM originally was in the business of making typewriters sold around the world, hence the reason for the name that later became an abbreviation.
Really? People don't know that IBM stands for International Business Machines after all these years?
Really? You did "extensive" research on the company for your interview and NOWHERE you looked mentioned this?
I find it hard to believe. Sounds like you were unprepared and/or unqualified and you can't take the responisbility for that so you're making up a bullcrap reason why you didn't get it.
Today, I interviewed several people for the company I work for; IBM. One genius does quantum physics in his head but doesn't know what IBM stands for. Great, he can solve complex mathmatical equations but needs a map to go to the bathroom. FML
#61 - On 06/23/2009 at 11:01am by Random_Poster
Don't interview with something you don't even know the name
#62 - On 06/23/2009 at 11:03am by TheLizardKing
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
#6- fuck off, nobody likes you, go kill yourself
#63 - On 06/23/2009 at 11:06am by TheLizardKing
You should have played it off like "IBM Stands for quality and innovation!" They would have ate that shit right up.
#68 - On 06/23/2009 at 11:59am by slimchaney
Geez, why are people saying that the OP should've researched more. First, if your qualified for the job you should be able to answer any practical question. Second, that question has nothing to do with work, unless it was a trick question. Heck if they change their name in a week the question would be made invalid. That shows how stupid the question is.
#71 - On 06/23/2009 at 12:17pm by kusiobache
I don't know if anyone has mentioned this because I can't be bothered to read through all the comments but this reminds me of an episode of I.T crowd when in a job interview Jen gets asked what I.T stands for and doesn't know. This now makes me suspicious of this FML.
And if it is true then YDI.
#73 - On 06/23/2009 at 12:30pm by shooting_star
If you're applying for the job, you should at least know what the acronym stands for, however I think that the interviewer was probably asking what IBM meant to you.
FAIL, YDI, even I know it stands International Business Machines and i have never applied there or worked there. Did you get the job, I'm kinda thinking know but that still really sucks. It is your fault though.
#77 - On 06/23/2009 at 12:51pm by Scotticus117
LOL #7 (organisedchaos) FTW.
FtheinterviewersL for not knowing how to ask the appropriate, relevant questions in an effing job interview.
#79 - On 06/23/2009 at 1:23pm by cutebebe778
That is a very relevant question to ask. They want to know the person applying to the job knows who the company is. When you apply to a company and work there you are representing the company. Other questions they'll ask may seem mundane too. Like, describe yourself in three words. may seem trivial and inconsequential but they are looking for a few things in that. Honesty, humility, and how well you THIKN on your toes. That was probably another reason for asking about IBM. What will the person do when confronted with a surprise question. Will they stammer, will they take too long to answer? with they be honest? Thats the reason for the whole three things about yourself question. Same as "what is your biggest fault." They don't want to know your biggest fault. They want to see if you just give a shotgun answer and they want to know if you are humble enough to say, I'm known to stub my toe on the occassion. They pay attention to pauses, they count how many times you say "um" and "like" and "er."
They have been interviewing people for how long now? And are the 15th largest in the US? I think they know what they are doing compared to some disgruntled kid on FML.
#82 - On 06/23/2009 at 1:31pm by MonkeySpeaks
So you did "extensive research" for a week and you never found out what IBM stood for?
#81 - On 06/23/2009 at 1:31pm by iSmellNice
One question I always asked in interviews: "Tell me about the best and worst bosses you ever had." I got to see how the candidate handled a question he/she wasn't expecting AND I knew that if the "worst boss" was in any way a description of me, this gig was not going to work out for either of us.
Lol nice. So when I work for you guys I'll just kiss up and describe my best boss to be just like you!
92: that requires you to know enough about your interviewer to make that description. Easier said than done, with someone you've known only as long as the interview.
#93 - On 06/23/2009 at 2:37pm by swagmonkey
You deserve that one. I don't know what IBM stands for either, but if I were interviewing for them, I'd damn well have found out before walking in. How can you possibly do "a week [of] extensive research and preparation for the interview" and not find out the company's full name?
#94 - On 06/23/2009 at 2:40pm by swagmonkey
Nice... But that would be a very awkward situation...
#105 - On 06/23/2009 at 3:57pm by redblueviolet
international business machines.....good job. I'm 16 and i know what it means
#100 - On 06/23/2009 at 3:17pm by nerdgrl128
well your 14 well guess what faggot go suck your mom nipple n suck your dad dick fag. u think your smart what atm, nasa,espn, and #101 suck dick stand for u fag
extensive research.....huh. I didn't know what it stood for either but i'm not trying to work there. You can come work with me at a coffee shop....the people i get to train have no idea how to make a fucking pot of coffee and they somehow still get hired.
#103 - On 06/23/2009 at 3:50pm by whyohwhyohwhy
If you're going to apply there, get an interview, and research it so much... don't you think one of the first things you'd check would be, "What the fuck does IBM stand for?"
YDI for not knowing the meaning of the company's name and not having enough common sense to look it up.
If you're good enough for the position you applied for, that shouldn't be a reason not to be hired, so it's not really a FML
The idea that someone would need to do RESEARCH to find out what "IBM" stands for makes me feel OLD.
i feel old just because i remember back when my dad would say "Get off the computer I'm expecting a call now" LOL...and im only 18!
#131 - On 06/24/2009 at 12:46am by madame_malfoy
You should have just said it stands for a company that powers its workers or something. You could have answered it without answering the acronym
#116 - On 06/23/2009 at 7:46pm by xobeachbabe
lol its international business machines ive known that since 2nd grade
#120 - On 06/23/2009 at 8:07pm by loldude1337
You have to watch The IT Crowd episode called Men Without Women! The interview in that is so much like your story!
Yeah, you should have looked it up as part of that "extensive research." Even though it's not something that actually helps you do the job better, knowing it would have shown the interviewer that you bothered to learn a bit about the company's history.
So, YDI.
That stands for You Deserved It, by the way, since you seem to have problems with simple acronyms.
#127 - On 06/23/2009 at 11:07pm by metonymy
Random fact: the numbering system used by the Nazis to sort concentration camp prisoners during the Holocaust was devised by IBM.
But YDI, little bits like knowing acronyms are actually important and especially so if they are part of the business name.
Don't worry. Come interview at Microsoft. If they fly you up to Redmond, perhaps I may interview you.
#130 - On 06/24/2009 at 12:46am by AlwaysRejected
Did you know if you google IBM the first link that show up:
IBM - International Business Machines Corp. (NYSE)
props to you and your 'extensive' research.
#133 - On 06/24/2009 at 1:11am by Airesuhana
IBM- International Business Machine
You and #1 are both retards. I'm 15 and this was taught to us when I was in 6th grade.
that sucks...
=X
interview tip #1: do a little research on the company you're trying to get a job with. it helps to know.
#137 - On 06/24/2009 at 6:04am by itsbriiibaby
That was one of the first things I saw when I typed IBM into google. How could you not know it? It's the first thing I would look up if I had an interview there.
I would have had to done an impromptu frank sanatra impression.
♪ I for I really want to wo~♪~ork~ here ♫
♫B for Because it's such a wonderful com~♪~pany ♫
♪M for I'll be Married to~♪~this job!♫
#145 - On 06/24/2009 at 2:40pm by Thrashersk
it stands for "I Bang Moms" not me but ive heard the creator is a little creepy
#147 - On 06/25/2009 at 2:24am by monkeykiller77
Did you know IBM used to ask programmers interviewing to count to ten. If you didn't start at zero, you weren't hired.
damn that sucks! but numbers go on for ever. so why start at 0 instead of negative infinity. haha wtf
they do that to every employee.... i dont want to be rude, but when i asked a friend of mine why, he said to weed out the dumb-asses
Lmao my mom works at ibm and she doesent know what it stands for when I asked her.
#152 - On 07/20/2009 at 4:30am by LMFAOWTFHAY
