Today, I went to the doctor to inquire about the nasty rash on my arms. He concluded that I'm allergic to beer and the rash will go away if I stay away from it. I'm a bartender. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I found out why I get so red all over at parties. Turns out I'm allergic to alcohol. FML
Today, I had an allergy test. Not only was I allergic to 35 out of the 40 items, they also found out that I'm allergic to the latex gloves my doctor happened to be wearing. Now my entire back is covered in a rash that will last at least another week. FML
Today, I finally went to have blood taken for an allergy test I really need. Afterwards, I had an allergic reaction to the bandaid they used on my arm. FML
Today, I found out I'm allergic to the pills my doctor prescribed for coughing, which I really need because I ripped a muscle in my stomach. Now my whole upper body is covered in a terrible itchy rash. I also found out it will last for at least another week. FML
Today, I was getting ready for a very unpleasant doctor's appointment. I got out of the shower and used a new body spray all over my torso and arms. Turns out I'm allergic to it and now my skin is on fire, so now I get to go to an already uncomfortable appointment even more uncomfortable than I'd planned. FML
Today, my roommate told me she had developed a rash on her armpits, which causes them to be itchy. The doctor told her the only way to heal it is to not wear deodorant for a month. FML
Today, I got a new skin cream for my acne. I tested it on a small patch of skin just to make sure I wasn't allergic. I was, and the reaction didn't stay on that small patch of skin. My left arm is now almost entirely covered in a horrible rash. FML
Today, I had an allergic reaction to my deodorant. My armpits wouldn't stop itching, and by the time my shift was over, they were raw and bloody. FML
Today, I sliced my arm open on the weekend, patched it with a fabric bandaid. Had an allergic reaction to the bandaid, arm now swollen, blistering and keeping-me-awake itchy. Pharmacist's advice? "Oooh, that looks bad. Better put a bandaid on that." FML
Today, I got my medical checkup back. Apparently, I'm diagnosed with a liver condition generally found in alcoholics. I've never drank in my life. FML
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Top comments
stevenJB 25
Wear long sleeves? Maybe you can ask for another position in the place you work? I'm sure your boss will understand. c:
DocBastard 38
Allergic to beer? No. You can be allergic to something in beer, but not beer itself. That's like saying you're allergic to tuna salad.
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Comments (41)
stevenJB 25
Wear long sleeves? Maybe you can ask for another position in the place you work? I'm sure your boss will understand. c:
goose12321 11
Long sleeves wouldn't work, if you get beer on them it'll just soak through to the skin anyway, except this time it'd be constantly pressed against the skin.
Bakarra 22
Looks like you'll have to pour with perfection from now on, good luck OP
Damian95 16
It will improve your ability to make and pour drinks. Definitely beneficial. :D
nishantvas 13
seems like its no spilling from now on... atleast this'll improve your skills..
Sir_ND_Pity 35
I seems you won't be able to get back to wort!
ry24 12
Time to find a new job OP!
euphoricness 28
Because finding a new job is soooo easy...
ry24 12
I never said it was, I'm simply saying he should start looking for one
euphoricness 28
You're right, but it is still kind of hard to find a job you would enjoy attending to. Hopefully OP hates being a bartender now
Wizardo 33
Wear gloves OP, become one of those super fancy bartenders and make shaken not stirred Martinis :D
K410 18
I never thought that was even possible! :o fyl
HowieDoIt 21
Come on doc, way tequila mood and a career!
DocBastard 38
Allergic to beer? No. You can be allergic to something in beer, but not beer itself. That's like saying you're allergic to tuna salad.
death943 10
DocBastard knows what is right. He has a degree in FMLogy
perdix 29
#9, I'm guess it's the hops, which is why the OP should also avoid bunnies and frogs.
etoilenuit 15
Unless its something that is always in beer. Then you would be allergic to "beer" Technically you can be allergic to tuna salad if you are allergic to tuna.
MidnaLink 33
Isn't Barley in Beer? Maybe OP is allergic to that.
captainObviously 15
Docbastard has a degree in dickology
ajeppsen 25
#43 Don't insult our precious! jk. But in all seriousness: allergic to what's in your beer? At least there are other ways.to.enjoy yourself and watch your friends do stupid shit
perdix 29
You should just stick to the hard stuff and you'll be OK. Nowhere does it say that a bartender has to drink beer. If you are frequently getting doused in beer, I'm sure your boss and your customers are none too impressed!