Today, my boss "borrowed" my prescription sunglasses off my desk. She crashed her car because they made her dizzy, and thinks I should pay for the damages. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
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Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML
Today, at work, somebody stole my sunglasses. Fed up with the constant theft in my office, I stormed up to my boss, as he had long ago promised to catch the thief. He listened patiently to my rant before pointing out that my sunglasses were on my head. FML
Today, my mom's boss reversed into my parked car. She expects me to say that it's my fault so she doesn't have her insurance increase. FML
Today, I walked into the glass door of my boss’s cabin and broke my spectacles. Thank god for a backup pair, right? Wrong. I fell down the stairs and broke them too. FML
Today, while out shopping, a middle aged man snatched my sunglasses off my face, threw them off the ground, and stomped on them, saying, "That’s what you get for trying to look cool, asshole!" I suffer from light-induced migraines. FML
Today, I lost my glasses. I don't have spares but my girlfriend said I could borrow hers. She doesn't understand why this won't work. FML
Today, I dinged my boss's very expensive car. My car wasn’t damaged, so in a panic, I moved my car to another spot and said nothing. Less than an hour later, my boss showed me high definition security footage, so now I either cough up repair money I can’t afford, or I get fired. FML
Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML
Today, while walking to my car after work, I witnessed some moron who was texting while riding her bike running right into my parked car, resulting in a broken side mirror, a damaged windshield, two dents, and for her, a broken phone and nose. She's threatening to sue me for damages. FML
Today, I found a pair of glasses in my car. I don't wear glasses, and nobody besides myself has been in my car lately. It appears that someone has been sleeping in my car and forgot their glasses. FML
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Top comments
drewflav 17
Your boss is a fucktard! No one should be taking stuff off your desk without permission, ever. That's the kind of trouble it invites. You'll be fine OP, your boss can't touch you this time.
HanaFML 10
I think she should pay for your new glasses!
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Comments (139)
drewflav 17
Your boss is a fucktard! No one should be taking stuff off your desk without permission, ever. That's the kind of trouble it invites. You'll be fine OP, your boss can't touch you this time.
ThomasScott 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
This time? Touch them where?
Shenanigans9 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I believe zey making use of a metaphor, as in, the boss would not physically touch ze OP, but rather touch zem in court.
Catkam623 27
Are you so sure ops boss could use suing to blackmail op into letting him touch ops no no spot ;$
tjv3 10
Well if they work in an at will state then she can come up with 1000 reasons to fire OP
evilplatypus 38
70 - Pennsylvania is not an at will state. They are an implied contract state: basically meaning if both the employee and the employer uphold the implied contract created at time of employment (you do this; we'll do this/pay this), the employee can't be fired (though they can be laid off). The boss firing the employee because the boss crashed their own car after stealing the employee's belongings would be a breach of any implied contract.
kj51 5
My question is why the **** did she take prescription sun glasses and just start driving in them
damn_homie 2
That bitch stupid.
CorruptAngel920 18
I'd hate to say it platypus, but on the PA gov't website that I just looked at. PA IS an at-will state.
Brandi_Faith 33
76- I'm pretty sure she didn't know they were prescription, and wanted sunglasses while she was driving; knowing she didn't have any with her, she took OP's.
evilplatypus 38
101 - They must have changed it then, because it was implied contract according to the worker's rights pages I was looking at.
maccapacca 10
You are both right, 109 and 101. Pennsylvania IS an at-will state, HOWEVER it recognises an implied contract as an exception to this rule.
bluejayscheer 7
People are just ridiculous sometimes
zango1 15
People like OP's boss are the reason I'm against animal testing. There are vast tracts of the human population we could use instead.
lilhellian 26
A certain lil puply would be happy to test on humans.. Definately not because I want revenge for my fellow animals.. *rolls eyes*
SammyS2012 21
What aggravate me is when people take my glasses and then complain, "wow I can't see anything!" I'm almost legally blind, obviously my glasses will do that if you have perfect vision, idiot.
tsent8 15
#41 a certain human would like to pet said certain puppy because said puppy is fricken adorable.
lilhellian 26
A certain lil puppy might let you..
evilplatypus 38
If rather *boop* the nose...
lilhellian 26
But, But my nose:'(
Jakespeed207 4
Ugh... I'm sorry, puppy, I just... I... *BOOP!*
evilplatypus 38
Gah...for those of you wondering, that should have said "I'd". I'm curious why my phone decided to change "Id" to "If", rather than "ID" or "I'd"...
Blurgas 16
Zango, at first I was going to give you flak in regards to the "against animal testing" part, then I finished reading your comment and thought "Oh, yea, that's fine, the gene pool could use some chlorine"
catlover5299 18
51, the same thing happens to me, my "friends" take my glasses and toss them, leaving me to search for where they went.
MassiveBerry 9
Your boss is an idiot.
DogsPaw 16
If you take someones glasses and they make your vision change (For the worst being specific for OP) You bypass being an idiot.
EsotericBrent 29
Maybe the glasses were spec'd right, and the boss is just a terrible driver?
HanaFML 10
I think she should pay for your new glasses!
HanaFML 10
I misread the fml.. Ignore my comment.
HanaFML 10
I misread the FML... Ignore my comment
bluejayscheer 7
Op didn't say the glasses were broken
HanaFML 10
20- I misread the FML.
happle 21
20- Do you think the glasses were okay after a car crash?
bluejayscheer 7
73- I'm just assuming that if op's boss didn't break their face the glasses weren't broken either...
corporatescoundr 25
I seen 20's comment and said aloud 'She just said she misread the FML' then I saw 25 lol
apaloosa_fml_fml 21
Your boss is an ass!
sunkissedluster 20
sorry your boss is a cwunt, fight that shit
MsConfusedd 27
What's a cwunt?
Athleticism 11
I think grandma might know.
PenguinBitch 43
*****
Futacy 29
Does that mean pussy? Lol
kevsandy303 12
STFU! I'm trying to watch a movie! *poors soda onto head*
DrunkButterfly 17
Lol its pores not poors
DrunkButterfly 17
Lol its pores not poors
evilplatypus 38
86 - Please tell me you're joking. If you're going to correct someone, at least correct them correctly. It's "pours".
evilplatypus 38
86: Please tell me you're joking. If you're going to correct someone, at least correct them correctly. The word you are looking for is "pours."
perdix 29
#10, a German philosopher, but we discussed that earlier.
soja_fml 18
actually it's POURS.
evilplatypus 38
Please forgive my double post. FML froze up on me and my comment didn't appear when I refreshed everything.
DrunkButterfly 17
haha oops I never was to good at spelling just trying to help sorry
evilplatypus 38
96 - I'm not good at math, that's why I don't try to help people with math. If you aren't good at it, why would you try to correct someone who may/may not be good at it?
ollie179 21
How dare you leave those sunglasses laying about! You better pay for those damages!
etchsanity1 11
Lol ya never know I had a guy try to make me pay for his motorcycle when he crashed into my truck... Luckily I was in my driveway at the time and he was drunk
MistaBlista 9
It seems like she's just looking for someone to put the blame on. FYL OP.
MsConfusedd 27
I'm assuming by the fml that she didn't ask, but if she did, you should have told her. If she didn't, tell her it's her fault for taking something that's not hers without your permission.
VampObsessed 16
I'm assuming by putting the word borrowed in quotations that the boss did not ask for permission.
MsConfusedd 27
53- I did say that
BlueFlatts 20
Don't worry Vamp, she's confusedd. It's not her fault.
hateevryone 14
Don't pay for nothing. Your stupid boss should pay for it.
drewflav 17
You're saying both OP and the boss should pay for it? Be careful with the double-negatives ;)
BlowinChronic 18
Yeah, don't pay for nothing OP, pay for something! Cause it's allllllll your fault.