Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50300) - you totally deserved it (5161)
On 04/08/2009 at 11:43pm - misc - by BadBreath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
And why was your dogs ass in your face? You would think it would be facing you, maybe licking your face.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWN_AL9vrbc
Smelling a fart is bad. Tasting and breathing it is a whole 'nother level of disgusting.
Your dog is great. He made you stop self pitying and think about something else. Btw if he farted he probably wanted to go outside...
#4 - On 04/09/2009 at 6:20am by nicolas
Lol. Your dog is awesome!
But yea, why was his ass right in your face?
At least your not feeling sorry for yourself any more.
I'm sorry that you had a horrible day but this is one of the funniest FML's I have ever read.
I loled so hard.
*gags @ 11* this is funny but i have one intelligent thing to say
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW E=Mc2
#12 - On 04/09/2009 at 7:29am by Emmett_Luver_101
#12 - wtf? E=Mc2? what has that got to do with a dog's farts?
#11 - LOL
#10 - I agree!
OP - What WAS your mouth doing on your dog's ass? That's almost as bad has hammylove's. (anyone notice their name is BadBreath, haha!)
http://www.fmylife.com/sex/878433
Tough love eh?
Lol maybe he was trying to cheer you up? Lmao
#18 - On 04/09/2009 at 8:56am by MaiLouIsLegend
Bahahaha! Ewwww.... but it still loves you unconditionally! ;) Upside!
#19 - On 04/09/2009 at 8:58am by UnCensoredBitch
talk about adding insult to injury... but I have a question, how come your dogs butt was pointed towards your mouth?
The only thing I can gather from this is that you were doing some kind of interspecies 69ing... Never let dogs put their asses near your face. It's just disrepectful.
12, E=mc2 has a completely different meaning than E=mc^2. ;)
#22 - On 04/09/2009 at 9:39am by PTERONOPHOBIA
I think a dog farting in your face is sufficiently distracting...
#25 - On 04/09/2009 at 10:19am by intoxicant
Just for the record, it is highly debated within the scientific community whether or not animals have/can detect feelings. Somehow I doubt you have it all figured out, #17.
I can't think of any reason - upset or not - that your face would be THAT close to your dog's butt.
#29 - On 04/09/2009 at 10:46am by ellameno
Why was his butt in your face and why was your mouth also open....that's nasty :S
#30 - On 04/09/2009 at 10:47am by OperationNicole
this is so stupid. first, why didn't you move when the dogs ass was RIGHT there..? and 2nd, I'd rather be hearing about your horrible day. this is completely your fault.
#31 - On 04/09/2009 at 10:48am by ohlordy_12
why would you have his mouth near his ass.... regardless if he farted or not...
#32 - On 04/09/2009 at 10:58am by zzzzzzzzzz
I agree, 36, that cats are far superior to dogs in basically every way (and they know it, too!)...but my cat sleeps right next to my pillow and I have experienced my share of cat farts. Not pleasant.
REALLY?!? This has to be one of the fakest ones I have seen yet. Why would a dog's ass be anywhere near your mouth once, much less twice. Whoever has the last say on these needs to learn to spot a fake a little better!
#42 - On 04/09/2009 at 11:48am by no_damn_luck
why the fuck was your dogs ass near your mouth when he was 'consoling' you? I wouldn't feel too much better if I was crying and my dog put her ass in my face
wow half the fucking FMLs on this site end with "Twice." I know most of these are fake but come on, get some new material
Why was his/her butt facing towards your mouth in the first place?
#1: Yes! Haha
That is one of my new favorite FMLs.
#48 - On 04/09/2009 at 1:06pm by jdkfgkjdfb
i found this sunn cause right as i read this my dog jumped on my bed with me, but his butt didn't go anywhere near my face
sorry *i found this funny cause right as i read this my dog jumped on my bed with me, but his butt didn't go anywhere near my face
You gotta admit, it's sucks, but it's definitely something you can laugh about.
#54 - On 04/09/2009 at 1:43pm by becky_becks
Why was your dogs ass next to your open mouth? You kind of deserve it just for failing so hard
#55 - On 04/09/2009 at 1:48pm by Panicattackx5
hey everyone saying OP puts their mouth on his ass, not true.
my dogs always do that so i'll scratch their lower back near the tail. dont overthink things! this is hilarious. lol
also, her mouth was open and eyes closed because she was sobbing
Fart in my mouth once, shame on you, fart in my mouth twice, shame on me. YD BITCH
#59 - On 04/09/2009 at 3:04pm by JimboSmitty
thats not too bad... my dog has been eating his poop for the last few days then attempting to lick me
ughhh!!!!! that is disgusting!!!!!!!!
well, he loves u alright, lol!
#62 - On 04/09/2009 at 3:38pm by jessxoxo28
What are you doing cuddling your dog's ass, retard? Either YDI or you're lying.
#63 - On 04/09/2009 at 3:42pm by YouMustBe_Joking
#50......BAHAHAHAHAHA that comment made this FML worth reading :)
#64 - On 04/09/2009 at 3:56pm by cornwallqueen
Why was your mouth on your dogs ass? Thats the real FML.
#65 - On 04/09/2009 at 4:00pm by infowarrior
Sorry you're sad, but I'm going to have to say YDI for using your mouth to inspect your dogs bum so closely...
Why was his butt by your face?? It would make more sence if he was licking you and burped in your mouth.
#70 - On 04/09/2009 at 6:15pm by JessiBessi93
im gonna be honest im calling bullshit becasue when dogs fart they dont make sounds so prolly not true
#74 - On 04/09/2009 at 9:21pm by Eric666
That's what you get for trying a "69" with your dog to cheer you up. Try something else - they don't call it a "doggy style" for nothing...
#84 - On 04/10/2009 at 5:14am by Blanadestroyer
i agree, your dog luvsss yewww :)
don't worry, your dog farted because he either had gas or he just wanted to make you laugh
#85 - On 04/10/2009 at 3:18pm by peeinatree
lol, i'm sorry but that was hilarious. and like someone else said, at least he got you to think about something else
#86 - On 04/10/2009 at 10:50pm by duchesse427
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA
hahahahahaha... HILARIOUS! usually the stories are stupid but this one is awesome. turns out your dog didnt want to console you, he wanted a litter box.
so... this doesnt make sense. never have i spent time with my dog while his asshole was on/very near my mouth.
Lmao at the thought of you thinking your dog loves you when it has its asshole in your face.
#91 - On 04/13/2009 at 4:07am by conorlawlz
this is such bullshit. if you had his ass in your face i'm sure that a fart wouldn't be that surprising to you. fml lies are unimpressive.
#93 - On 04/14/2009 at 12:12pm by utinaeniduin
hahahahahhaha (: that is the funniest thing ive ever heard/
#94 - On 04/14/2009 at 6:18pm by amazingapril
Wait, lmfao.. but why was the dog's butt by your face?
I'm guessing you were laying on the couch and the dog was either just sitting by your face or laying down next to you, his head facing your feet and his butt facing your head, lol.
This FML is cute in a weird.. way. Just the dog consoling part, not the fart.
#97 - On 05/11/2009 at 2:50am by egypt
WHY ON EARTH WAS YOUR FACE IN YOUR DOGS ASS!?!?!?!
oh dear lord.
#102 - On 09/28/2009 at 10:24am by kristennnnn
Why was your dogs ass in your face? That's a sick kind of consoling if you think of there his face was ;D
