yeah a Good friend...think about now she is stuck with the cheater

a betrayer and a cheater.

Look at me I'm replying to #1 FLAME ME!!!


Well, anyways, get her dad pregnant. That should get her back.

Wtf @ 60....

Anyhoo just let your "friend" and probably EX boyfriend have a happy life. They can go deal with parenthood now... You'll find someone better.

i hope you killed her : )

64 is completely right. she did you a favor by proving that she and your boyfriend were sucky people. support them and forgive them but dont get involved.

Why "support and forgive"?

That's a load of bullshit. The OP got stabbed in the back by her friend and her boyfriend and her response should be "OH, I forgive you. I hope you have a wonderful life!"

No, her response should really be more "knife applied to car tires".

I agree with #84. you just hit two birds with one stone. now you know you won't be involved with either of them

@60: Get her DAD pregnant?! Good luck with that...

YOUR STUPID....

Hahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha. Perfect.

This comment is made of win.

if she's going to carry a baby from a lowlife cheatin liar like that, the whole situation has built in revenge. Take some time, recover emotionally, then sit back and watch the free drama performance unfold.

...make popcorn and sell tickets.

If OP was giving her congrats on the pregnancy, I highly doubt they are in high school. Here are how people in high school take pregnancy news:

Mother/Father/Everyone Else: "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..."

"Zomgzz Chloe what are you wearing to Brad's party friday night, do you want to join my study group and did you need me to dryclean your cheerleading outfit...... wait? you're pregnanT! OMG CONGRATZZZZ THATZ SOOOO COOL!"

Fail #9 for thinking they're teenagers.

@ #47

Because all us teenagers are TOTES like that, rite???

Honestly, I'm 19 and I know several people who are pregnant/have had a child, and the first thing you do as a friend when you hear the news is congratulate them - not jump down their throat or start freaking out. While for many, having a child while still in your teens is an inconsiderate or downright stupid thing to do, now that she's pregnant, it's not going to help her to receive nothing but nasty feedback. It's common courtesy. :/

i'm 19 too but if my best friend told me she were pregnant, the first this i would say is "are you serious?" not congratulate them. And honestly, my best friends would probably be freaking out too much over a pregnancy to be congratulated.

I actually did get pregnant at 19 and to this day when people tell me they're pregnant I say... 'GOOD LUCK!' hahaha. Babies suck.

I'm 22, and at my age, most babies are still accidental with most of the people i hang out with... So baby = fail. What I don't understand is why we say congratulations to people when they fall pregnant - OH your contraception failed? WELL DONE! So if i hear someone's pregnant, i always ask if it's on purpose before i say OMG CONGRATZ or FAIL i know a clinic...

Well I'm assuming that by her tone of voice when she gives you the news you'd be able to surmise whether she was happy with the pregnancy or not. :/

It all depends on the individual circumstances.

Teenage pregnancy is not cool. You may say that at the age of 19 the the female is adult. But I've seen my sister who had a baby when she was 18. Man she has become weak after that. Pregnancy is not fun. It requires so much of physical and mental strength. It has been scientifically proven that the best age to get pregnant is between 23 and 29.

Your sister doesn't represent every teenage pregnancy ever, so don't act like just because you've seen it done you know everything about it. I know a few successful teenage pregnancies - just because you're young doesn't mean it's bound to fail. My mom started having kids when she was nineteen, and my grandmother started having kids when she was sixteen. I don't plan on having children any time soon, but again, as I've stated previously, it's all about individual circumstances.

Some people are financially stable, mature, and prepared for pregnancy by 18 or 19 years of age. Others are not. It doesn't make sense to make a huge blanket statement like, "all teen pregnancies are bad."

And it's hard to "scientifically prove" when would be the best time to become pregnant, and any data received from these tests would only provide baseline data for a large population - again, not necessarily relevant to each individual's circumstances. And technically, the most accurate age they have come up with so far is mid-thirties, so I'm not sure where you got your data.

You have to take into account health, financial stability, supportive family relationships, and many other considerations before you decide on a "perfect age" for you. And even if you get pregnant before then, that doesn't necessarily mean your family will fail.

theanonimouse: i believe that mothers that give birth between the age of 23 and 29 are more likely to stay healthier and strong throughout the pregnancy, producing healthy and strong babies. i'm not completely sure, as the data was represented in a weird way and i have no credentials in the area.

#61- The idea of saying "congrats" is not always to give your approval. I sure have said that to some pregnant people that I definitely wished weren't, but the woman/girl has already gotten pregnant. Sometimes it's best just to give support and not say anything negative.

Theanonimouse #47 is right

I don’t know where you live, but where I live 18 year olds are considered adults. I’m 20 not much older than you, what I consider to be teenagers are 12-17 year olds, people who are in junior high/high school. 18-24 year olds are more like young adults, and are reasonably capable of handling a pregnancy on their own, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Females before our generation got pregnant at very early ages for many different reasons. Trying to compare your grandmother/mother to our time is irrelevant, my mom and grandmother had tons of kids in their early 20s and late teens, there was a time when girls had kids at 14 but those times don’t apply to us today. In this era if you are 17 and under (a teenager), and you’re having a baby, regardless of your financial stability you’re an idiot. (That is unless you planned to get pregnant, highly unlikely at that age) NO teenager in their right mind would congratulate another on getting pregnant.

OP is clearly an adult, which is why she jump at congratulating her friend.

If you are16 perfectly healthy, and lucky enough to be born with a silver spoon in your mouth, it still doesn’t make it ok for you to just go out and get pregnant. I still consider Jamie lynn spears an idiot regardless of whatever support she may get for her baby. Just because you’re rich doesn’t make you any smarter for being pregnant at that age.

Yeah. Where I live, if you're at some age where the number ends with "teen," you're a teenager, i.e. 13-19.

At age 12, you're a pre-teen.

Although I admit 18- and 19-year-olds are older teens, I don't see how you can make such a huge distinction between a 17-year-old mother and an 18-year-old mother, simply because the government has decided to make an arbitrary judgement on who is considered an "adult" and who isn't.

People of OUR generation still get pregnant at early ages for many different reasons. That didn't magically change in the last thirty years.

Sorry if I don't consider anyone under the magical age of 18 who gets pregnant an idiot. I prefer to consider individual circumstances. I know a lot of 17-year-olds who are more mature than some 20-year-olds I know.

Also, I guess I mustn't be in my right mind because I still congratulate my friends who are happy with their pregnancies. I should probably just shun them and never speak with them again because you're the great authority on what others are and are not allowed to do with their own lives?

Okay.

66, you're kind of a bitch. Just because it's not planned doesn't me it's unwanted. I'm 22 and pregnant with my boyfriend's baby. Yes, it was unplanned, but we're both very excited about it. We're both done with school and have good jobs. Just because it wasn't planned doesn't mean it was a mistake.

If your child reads you saying that, you'll be the one saying FML. Unless you had an abortion, in which case, FYL anyway, abortions are emotionally scarring.

Wow, that was so off-topic. FYL too, OP. You did get out of two bad relationships, at least- and hey, there ARE better people out there to be friends/girlfriends with. Now you know what to avoid.

...dude....seriously? What do you think brought you into this world?

that's the point exactly, pregnancy isnt a good thing for allowing people like them into the world LOL

Pfft pregnancy is for sluts

Really #81? So I guess your Mom is a slut.

#16:
Do you REALLY think she's going to marry her boyfriend who cheated on her/got her best friend pregnant?
THINK.

OP: wow, that really really sucks :( Sorry about that, FYL.

This made me think of that Twilight shit.
Jacob = pedophile.

douche. quoting twilight

I was thinking that . Wait untill the babys older , you could be a cougar ;o

Burn in hell for making me think of Twilight! :P

Lemme guess, you're a Christian/Jew/Muslim. How close-minded.

If you had a single friend who told you this, you think you would say "Oh wow, congratulations! I know you've been trying to get pregnant from one night stands for a while now!" or do you think it might be a little bit more likely you'd ask some questions first like "Who's is it?" before you start with the congratulations? Pretty close minded of you to assume you must be religious to realise you wouldn't just start congratulating someone who is single on being pregnant.

While I agree it was closed-minded of portablecupid to assume vexx is religious simply based on the views vexx presented in his/her comment, it is also closed-minded (and kind of insulting) to assume that just because a pregnant woman is single, she doesn't deserve to be congratulated on her pregnancy. :/

I don't think it's really about "deserving" being congratulated. I don't think most friends would offer up congratulations to a single friend who's told them they're pregnant, not because they don't deserve it, but probably because they don't want it, and would rather talk about how they ended up in that situation and what they're going to do about it. When was the last time you heard someone getting excited about getting pregnant from a one night stand.

I'm not agreeing with 29's use of the word deserve, but it isn't something you're going to say first thing to a single friend.

Being out of a relationship doesn't necessarily mean you don't want to be pregnant in the same way that being in a relationship doesn't necessarily mean you DO want to get pregnant.

It would depend on the individual. I have known singles who were thrilled with their pregnancy, and I have known "attached" people who were absolutely crushed.

How is that closed-minded? and just because you're religious and follow a set of morals doesn't make you any more closed-minded than the next person.
If someone tells you they're pregnant and they're not seeing anyone then your first question is going to be "who?" seeing as they're best friends, they can ask each other that. So it's fair to say that the bestfriend had a boyfriend and so the OP said congrats assuming the baby was the bf of the bestfriend's...get it?

Sweetie, I never had a problem understanding the situation.

And no, being religious does not make an individual closed-minded, just like being non-religious doesn't make an individual open-minded. However, assuming your moral codes apply to others and then judging other people for not adhering to them does.

So sure, I'm assuming it would be fair to say that if faced with a single best friend's unexpected pregnancy, YOUR first reaction would be a question regarding the identity of the father. However, it is naive to assume that everyone would react in the same way. For example, I, like the OP, would first congratulate the friend, then later ask about the father.

theanon - No one's saying a single woman shouldn't be happy about their pregnancy. Just that that's not the assumption you'd make on first hearing the news. You would be concerned about if they were OK with the circumstances, and ask her for details. There's a lot more complications if you're pregnant out of a relationship like whether or not they even know who the father is, if they can tell him, if he will have any part of the child's life, and then of course all the issues of supporting a child alone and child support etc. By no means am I saying that should discourage a single mother or is a reason to be upset by the pregnancy, but they are real issues, and they are a big deal to a lot of woman, and I think the vast majority of people would be first concerned with whether their friend felt up to those challenges, and whether or not a congratulations was in order. Women who get pregnant out of relationships are a lot more likely to have abortions or adopt the baby out, and saying congratulations to someone who's planning to do that isn't exactly very tactful.

A lot of those same issues are present when a woman gets pregnant while in a relationship, also. Namely, whether she wants the pregnancy, whether plans to get an abortion, whether she thinks she is capable of supporting a child, if she thinks her partner will support her decision to keep/not keep the baby, and a whole host of other issues.

Therefore, I think whether or not you first congratulate the individual would have a lot more to do with individual circumstances, (ie whether you think she would want to get pregnant or not), than whether or not she is in a relationship.

ooh i created drama. interesting. and no i'm not in the least bit religious.

Also yes, deserve was a poor choice of word. it was 5am and I had not slept. Shoot me.

My views are biased I suppose, I do not and never want children. My best friend is the same way.

If I see a stupid, spun-out debate over silly trivial things like this, I'll just know mobius8 is behind it!

Seriously that's just what you say when someone gets pregnant, unless they're like 12 or something. You don't ask them who the father is, you don't ask them whether they're going to keep it or not or anything else like that- FIRSTLY you congratulate them, because that's normal social etiquette. Some people on this site need to get off their computer and go talk to people because they clearly have no idea how.

Uh, I'm pretty sure first thing you should do is find out the circumstances. If it was a drunken one night stand I'm pretty sure they wouldn't want to be congratulated. When my friend told me she was pregnant I hesitated and asked if it was a good thing. THEN congratulated her.

Oh go obsess elsewhere instrument. I was defending the person who made this comment saying their views didn't indicate religious belief. If I'd agreed with the person saying they were close minded and religious for making an assumption based on common sense I'm guessing you'd be frothing at the mouth over that too. Go pop a couple of xanax and stay the fuck off the internet you retard.

Theanon - Yes, women in relationships probably often do have some of the same issues if they find out they're pregnant. If your friends with them you probably have some idea of whether or not they want a baby or not, and again, would probably ask a few details before rushing into a misplaced congratulations. Perhaps you wouldn't. Most people though, would, and I think it's probable the OP was also in a relationship.

... um... well of course the OP was in a relationship... it says so in the FML?

But anyway I guess we can agree to disagree here. It's not going to change my congratulating preggers people, or your not congratulating them.

OPs friend* obviously.

And I didn't say I wouldn't congratulate them. Just that I wouldn't as my first response if I didn't know their feelings on it, and that most people wouldn't. It doesn't really matter if you would and I wouldn't. MOST single people aren't actively trying to get pregnant, and MOST people wouldn't say congratulations to someone when they're not sure how they feel about it, so it's MOST likely the OPs friend was in a relationship.

Okay, bb. :)

I agree.

OP: Don't get pulled into helping them with the child. Cut your ties and move on, neither one of them deserves you.

ha ha ha thats brilliant!!!

Sorry bout the Boyfriend/Best friend thing.. they deservee eachother..at least you can get outta it.. they stuck together now.. enjoy your sleeping in and dating other people.. and if she asks you if she looks fat just burst out laughing!!!

People these days...

That right there is the suggestion of the day!

dump both the back stabbing fuckers

whoa...your name suits you

That's kinda the point.

My comments here are either like the one above (rude, crude, violent), somewhat compassionate, or completely fucking random.

Ah, the fun of the internet.

#92 hahaha thats hilarious
Op: Thats sucks for you, but you should have found out the circumstances ..and she doesn't sound like she's married so in that case it wouldn't be a congrats if it happened to me. I wouldn't want a baby without being married. Your hopefully ex boyfriend is a jerk and so is your, again, hopefully ex best friend, i agree with everyone saying to cut your ties with them.

why would you want to punish the kid by wishing for it to be retarded? that's just harsh, the kid doesn't deserve that just because its parents are disgusting, shallow slutty cunts

Wow. This is the second batshit insane comment like this I've seen from you. You obviously have issues. Please seek help.

someone here is bitter over a failed relationship~