Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML
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Today, the stall I was using didn't have any toilet paper in it. Being the immature idiot I am, I was too embarrassed to ask for someone to grab me some. So I waited 45 minutes for the bathroom to be empty and crept into the next stall, only to find it was also out of toilet paper. FML
Today, I had to pee badly. I went into a stall and sat down. Only until after I'd peed, I realized that I didn't have any toilet paper. I waddled to the next stall with my pants down to get more toilet paper, believing that the bathroom was empty. It wasn't. FML
Today, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed my stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with my pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. FML
Today, I was in a public toilet stall and realized too late that there was no toilet paper left on the roll. I had to awkwardly shuffle around in a panic, knocking on the stall walls to ask for help. The guy in the next stall over gruffly said, “Dude, be a man, just use a sock or something.” FML
Today, I had just sat down and taken a dump in a public restroom when I realized there was no toilet paper. I tried to discreetly call for help, but no one heard me. My only option was to text a friend and have them bring me some. The worst part? My friend ended up texting me, "You called for backup?" as I waited in humiliation. FML
Today, I was at a new shopping mall. After an hour, I desperately needed to use the bathroom. Spotting one, I ran inside, locked myself in a cubicle and relieved myself. The toilet paper was out so I knocked on the cubicle beside me to ask for some. A lady's voice answered. She needed some too. FML
Today, I woke up to use the restroom, because I had to take a shit. There was basically no toilet paper left. I asked my boyfriend if he could go get some. It was 1 a.m. He said he’d go when the stores were open, then told me to just rinse off in the shower. FML
Today, I was at the movie theatre. I went to the bathroom, and was about to wipe my butt when I realized that where the toilet-paper dispenser should have been, there was a large hole. The woman in the next stall waved. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML
Today, I went to the restroom at school and when I finished my business, I noticed there was no toilet paper. I then began to wait, hoping that a janitor would come by with extra toilet paper. It wasn't until an hour later that I then realized there was four extra rolls hidden behind the toilet. FML
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Top comments
xMnky 8
Looks like you're shit out of luck.
TourettesGuyFTW 25
You seem like you're talking from experience...?
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Comments (112)
Warmonger_Smurf 29
Did you give him one of your socks?
TourettesGuyFTW 25
You seem like you're talking from experience...?
\ 28
...and that is the reason why I always keep napkins in my pocket.
NoShit_Sherly 11
Wow.. it must sock to be you
Rainhawk94 27
No. How would op ********** later
abitabanana 8
With the other sock, of course..
Rainhawk94 27
That's disgusting
awsamb 8
Man the comments really suck today.
TourettesGuyFTW 25
Suck...or sock??
mattyiscool123 26
No
jococo7787 3
You could take the stealth way and crawl out for some paper towels. Just imagine you're a secret agent trying not to get seen as you smuggle the automatic asswiper from the nazis back to an American base.
mackdeezy 22
You have no choice, use the seat protectors.
NeatNit 32
Really?! How many public bathrooms have SEAT PROTECTORS?!
kieralumina 30
Quite a few, but mostly at rest stops, au bon pain, and airports. The cleaner the bathroom is, the more likely you are to find seat covers.
jojimugo 20
If there is no toilet paper chances are there are no seat covers
Zimmington 21
Most places will put seat protecters in female restrooms It's rare there's any in the male's restroom
mattyiscool123 26
That is not true if it's in the women's it's in the men's
skyttlz 32
I've had to use a seat protector when there was no TP left in a public bathroom. They have seat covers pretty much every public place I go to, including my school and a church.
xMnky 8
Looks like you're shit out of luck.
Mshrodes 13
I bet in a few months (or less), "shit out of luck" will be the new "sounds like a shitty situation" aka THE pun to downvote.
CallMeMcFeelii 13
Don't you mean "your shit's out of luck"? Because OP's shit was definitely out of luck on this one.
beaglegal 42
Beat me to it.
swaggalikethat 22
Op'll be fine, sure he may lose one perfectly good sock, but hey, it's all good. He's still got the other one to ********** in.
obnum 19
I bet you run out of socks quickly...
iknowiwantyou 13
well the only thing you can do in moments like those is leave the stall and go into another one that has toilette paper.
iknowiwantyou 13
btw OP don't you put toilette paper on your seat before going? Thousands of asses have sat on those seats and you don't know what bacteria and germs are thriving on it.
SilverInGray 25
You do not need to put toilet paper on the seats. It's safe without it.
iknowiwantyou 13
you must like sitting on urine and toilet water residue.
\ 28
This one episode of Mythbusters showed them trying to culture bacteria off of a public toilet seat... They couldn't because even unwashed, the toilet seat was fairly clean. I guess most people have antibacterial asscheeks.
iknowiwantyou 13
I've seen toilet seats with drops of urine and blood (most likely from periods) so regardless, I'll still put toilet paper.
spoo 24
Wonder how bad the bottom of the seat would be...
CallMeMcFeelii 13
That blood isn't from periods, it's from your friendly neighborhood junkie! And he's leaving you a present, that present is called.. Hepatitis!
Epikouros 31
So it's #24's fault there's no toilet paper left to wipe your ass with.
iknowiwantyou 13
54 learn to make sense or better jokes.
Zimmington 21
I always put toilet paper down whether I see per on the seat or not.... then again I'm a bit of a germaphobe
CallMeMcFeelii 13
I'm one of those shitters who stand on the back of the toilet and shit horizontally on the wall. Then I "drop it like it is hot" and wiggle my bum up and down. No.. I don't do that, but that's what I imagine when I see someone else's shit all over the stall.
CrazyGirlfriend 21
I always put paper down on the seat if there isnt any seat protectors. There is usually always pee on the seat that I dont see but I do notice the paper soaking it up. Then again Im always the type to wash my hands for like two minutes after and open the door with my feet.
NoShit_Sherly 11
Should have followed the age old principle 'No tissue, no tushy'
NoShit_Sherly 11
Then again, when you gotta go, you gotta go
Zimmington 21
#37- so you just go & worry about how to whipe later?
usernameblocked 8
maybe the guy in the next stall will?
\ 28
Hey Thousand-Eyes, re-read the FML.
TheBrochure 22
#57 - I think he means the guy on OP's other side, unless OP is In the end stall.
zeldagirl77 7
*plot twist* Theres only one stall.
TheBrochure 22
Then That means the other guy is ******** in the...
False_Stupidity 41
..Urinal? ..Sink? Don't leave us in suspense like that #83!
Cwizer 17
Well that's a dump situation
Welshite 39
Changing one word in that horribly overused bash-my-head-against-a-wall sentence does not make it okay.
LissaMccracken 23
That doesn't even make sense...
\ 28
Goddamn it #19, you're violating the pact! Don't make us impose sanctions on you!!
fantae 20
Looks like a shitty situation. FYL
olpally 32
Well, good luck with that. Improvise using something that you're wearing? Idk. That's just awful. Lmao.
paulpring 9
Thats a pretty shitty situation...
Mshrodes 13
You're new around here, aren't you ?
awkwardloveannie 28
or he's from here and attempting to bring that bad pun back