Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, my dad grounded me for not having any friends. FML
Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML
Today, my dad forgot it's my birthday. When I told him about it, he accused me of lying and threatened to ground me for a week. FML
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know…" and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML
Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
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Top comments
Nyx_fml 23
Gosh. Dang it, OP. What the heck were you thinking? You must have sounded like an effin ice hole. Son of a mother trucker.
jondillboy 17
Interesting reason for being grounded.
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Comments (64)
jondillboy 17
Interesting reason for being grounded.
9echo 17
Some people should NOT be parents.
TheCanucklehead 22
Or wearing sweater vests
steffi90 13
time to man up.
ositoakaluis 16
sorry OP but I agree with your father
thrifting 18
The best time to wear a striped sweater, is all the time. One with a collar - turtle neck! That's the kind.
CanadiAnM8 24
Anyone else like OP's name.
GEBEH 14
Grounding a gamer - heaven on earth for one week without the restriction of knowing you could be doing other more important things in life!
Nyx_fml 23
Gosh. Dang it, OP. What the heck were you thinking? You must have sounded like an effin ice hole. Son of a mother trucker.
Enslaved 36
Johnny Dangerously? :P
sadistmonkey 19
Shut the front door!
DanielleinDC 33
No, that would be a farging icehole!
Cory123125 3
Man that's Nuckin futs!
IloveToLaugh143 21
I know right?! That is so fudgin' ridiculous. Then this son of a female dog, decides to ground me? Well cluck you too!!
alex_gen 39
Shut the front door!
xivoricbutterfly 25
Shut the full cup!
rockne93 17
I guess the only thing you can do is swear like a sailor?
FrankHotpants 31
..And what the **** is that suppose to mean?!
football98_fml 20
get one of those voice-changing microphones...
9echo 17
...because you sound more manly when you cuss like a little girl with a deep voice...
Cbnotme 20
And the voice changing microphone would only make the other people he's gaming with hear his voice differently, not his dad and his dad's friends who are over.
Espolax 8
Just wait until you curse "like a man" and u get grounded for cursing
shaww 28
Will THIIIIIIIIIS embarrass him?!?! TITTY **** NIGGA **** **** PUSSY DICK ****** BITCH SUCKING TITTY DICK ASS SHITTER
The_9th_Doctor 18
that's funny
djxerxes9000 18
Did you cry and yell "FIDDLESTICKS!" then storm off to your room?
eddeeezzyy 19
Let me guess....you called the other player a "jerk" instead of calling him a "**** sucking motherfucking shitfuck" huh?
BlesstheSilence 11
I pictured you saying "Son of a diddly!" in a Flanders voice.