Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be funny to change my ringtone to some guy crooning "Thank heaven for little girls" and then call me during today's teacher-parent conference. FML
Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML
Today, I was talking to a co-worker about birth control. Ten minutes later, I went to my sent e-mails to copy and reuse an old e-mail and realized I had sent "I tried calling you but your birth control is not working" to a student. It was supposed to say "voicemail". FML
Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML
Today, I was lying on the bed with my boyfriend. We were watching his cell phone when an automatic reminder message came on the screen: "Do not forget to tell a lie to babe about going out this Friday". FML
Today, my boss threw a pre-Christmas party at work. He always uses them to rant at us and tell us to be better employees. When the speech began, the alarm I have set for my daily birth control went off. It's the sound of an obnoxious screaming child. FML
Today, I attended a funeral. During the minute of silence, my phone went off. My ringtone is "It's good to be alive". FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, I went back home after seeing the doctor, I told my boyfriend my new medicine might cause some mood swings. He immediately grabbed his phone and pretended to take a call, then rushed out. FML
Today as I was waiting at the gynecologist I texted my husband to see if birth control pills were covered on our insurance...yep texted my boss instead who I had been asking about a raise..don’t think I’ll be getting that raise... FML
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Top comments
DeidaraAkatsuki 17
He's a keeper.
slooby_fml 25
That's pretty funny. I hope you have a sense of humor. I also hope you know how to get revenge
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Comments (120)
DeidaraAkatsuki 17
He's a keeper.
TheGodDamnJoker 9
So is that ringtone. xD
Koppol 15
#1 But apparently a baby isn't.
DeidaraAkatsuki 17
#28 its their decision, there's nothing wrong with that.
\ 28
And only a few weeks earlier, these kinds of comments were buried. FML is an enigma.
vipirius 18
It's 'cuz she's hot.
jayellef 3
Your boyfriends a keeper!! Hilarious. But I hate the sound of a ringing phone. Drives me insane so my phone is always on silent as well so I can see where you're coming from.
MrsDruidess 23
that's hilarious!! tale the joke and roll with it. When you have a chance, playfully get him back ;-)
lorraineald 7
I'm pretty sure that type of ringtone, mixed with OP's surprise and embarrassment, amused everyone in that waiting room. I'm sure they all went home and told this story to someone.
samsituation 11
Oh wow lol I'm sure u will laugh about it later
yomamaisonfier 7
*says the taco with a face*
persianninja 23
Or you could laugh about it now
ottokat 15
Yeah OP, I dont care how embarassing it was at the time - thats hysterical, and your boyfriend is too.
pinguino3669_fml 23
And he's creative enough to come up with a song for it, too!
slooby_fml 25
That's pretty funny. I hope you have a sense of humor. I also hope you know how to get revenge
gidgiddonihah 11
It was the first FML in a long time that I actually laughed at. I agree with everyone else. He is a definite keeper. Don't let him go.
OnlyTheDarkest 17
Let's hope it wasnt a birthing clinic's waiting room.
spearcom 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Just be glad it wasnt for that time of month
Roskie 16
I don't think reminders would be necessary...
Javier6597 19
You have to admit it was kinda funny
ohSNAPyall 26
Just a reminder... You're bleeding!
Rawr6591 21
the "or I'll say it ain't mine" part sucks but it's funny otherwise
doitlikeabrotha 10
That bit is clearly just a joke, this guy obviously isn't serious about everything otherwise he wouldn't have played this prank
QueenVicHop 12
Lol that's actually rather humorous, although an unfortunate location. Hope you have a good sense of humor OP!!
doitlikeabrotha 10
Could have been worse, what if she was with her parents and they don't know she's bumping uglies with this guy
Jemm_fml 29
Bumping Uglies? Is that what they say sex is now? I can never keep up with you kids and your nutty urban jargon-lingo.
cmayer 20
41, I feel like if she was young enough to be told what to do by her parents, she'd probably be in the waiting room with her parents and they would probably have to know about her being on birth control.
lorraineald 7
48- I refuse to call sex anything other than dipping winkies, and occasionally smashing pissers, or crotch boxing.
subwaysurfers 13
Your boyfriend is pretty funny and if I were in that waiting room, I'd probably be laughing at that.
longlivemetal911 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Get him back by setting your ringtone on his phone to, "Claim it ain't yours, I'll claim most of your paycheck as mine!" and wait until you know he's somewhere equally embarrassing to set it off.
longlivemetal911 15
Having said that, he sounds like he's got a charming sense of humor, keep him. :P
ArtinHopar 16
That doesn't even rhyme.
snugglesMcGee199 23
Then come up with something better. :)
BrookRae 19
No one said it rhymed, did they?