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Today, my new room-mate moved in. She spent over an hour obsessively searching the place for god knows what kind of secret recording devices, and now aggressively demands that I taste-test all of her pre-prepared meals to make sure they're not poisoned. FML
Your roommate has presented you the perfect opportunity to pull some master pranks. Use her paranoia to your advantage.
Put iocaine in her drink after building up an immunity to it. Problem solved.
Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.
Friday 19 December 2014