Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML
Today, I met a really nice guy. He was funny, handsome, and we were both into each other. He told me his name, and when I replied with mine, it came out sounding like, "I'm a bear." FML
Today, I ran into my crush of three years ago. We used to always walk our dogs together. He still remembered my dog's name. He didn't remember mine. FML
Today, I asked my crush what music he was into, misheard his answer because of background noise, so I spent 5 minutes enthusiastically talking about a band he'd never heard of, thinking we were bonding. When he finally stopped me and clarified, I laughed too loudly out of shame, then knocked over my drink. FML
Today, I finally had a date, my first one in well over a year. Everything was going good, until my date asked, "Do you like cats or dogs better?" When I responded cats, my date promptly got up and left, saying, "This isn't meant to be." FML
Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML
Today, I was walking my big, fat, fluffy old dog when I saw my crush. I waved enthusiastically, but my dog chose that moment to squat down and unleash a string of poop. My crush looked horrified as I tried to scoop it up while still waving. FML
Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML
Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!" Without thinking, I replied, "You too!" FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ICastillo 25
Oh yeah that breed of dog is awesome, very loyal, but they have a bad habit of humping things.
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
I thought the Dumbledore was a breed of goat, with the really long beard and all... The canine version of this would be pretty awesome.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (163)
Catkam623 27
Harry potter hope she's a fan
HowieDoIt 21
Harry potter probably hopes we are all fans...it's his movies after all
Catkam623 27
Harry potter :), hope she's a fan?
boofgall 16
He*, I believe.
rvnclwprfct731 13
I think they were referring to the OP, not Harry Potter.
Clioo_fml 17
19, the books then? They're not 'his' as you so describe it?
BRLHP 24
10 points for gryffindor
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
Get a dog and call it collie Creavey or bella-tricks le strange! Or Dobby the Doberman :)
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
I have more :P Ronweiler, Sirius Black labrador, or for old wizards in general, Gandalf the Greyhound :P
TML329 14
Hermione greyhound
FML_Whale 18
Nah, Hermione would be a cat, I think. In the books she accidentally transformed into a cat, and she had Crookshanks. Hermione just doesn't strike me as a dog.
chilldude69 8
96, one does not simply jump from Harry Potter to Lord Of The Rings.smh
tacojauns 45
That's my favorite too
Cairo_Sanchez 8
Simple mistake, I'm sure it's not gonna kill the relationship, unless he REALLY loves dogs
MichellinMan 20
I picture an epic dog, with an epic beard.
KrazieKleo 13
Hmm...a Labrador with its ears cropped and tail docked!! With Doberman markings. I like the sound of that!!
mystashisgone 6
I agree 58 I don't see the fml here unless he is really really Indi dogs ;-)
KrazieKleo 13
122- fair enough. No argument about that. Everyone is entitled to their opinion.
KrazieKleo 13
Plus I'm not a fan of ear cropping as you can tell by my profile picture. :).
ICastillo 25
Oh yeah that breed of dog is awesome, very loyal, but they have a bad habit of humping things.
EsotericBrent 29
I have a golden who does that too. Still one of the coolest guys I know. Playful, energetic, super friendly, and always wants to hangout. Couldn't ask for a better friend ^.^
ICastillo 25
Ah yes I've heard Golden Dumbledores are the best of the Dumbledore breed.
ElementaryEdGuy 18
Please tell me I'm not the only one who pictured a montage of Dumbledore humping things around the castle.
Squirrel1256 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I can just imagine a Dumbledore now.
MCRaddict15 15
..what?
gracehi 33
He means he can imagine a Labrador/Doberman mixed-breed dog.
vocaloidtiger 12
Well, at least I got it...
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
I thought the Dumbledore was a breed of goat, with the really long beard and all... The canine version of this would be pretty awesome.
MsConfusedd 27
Your profile picture fits the fml!!!!
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Just trying to save you guys the trouble of googling it, thought maybe if I used all my resources I could avoid getting my comment buried, but I guess I'm not getting so lucky today. :P
firefighter925 18
nailed it
Zebediabolical 45
Now you need to go buy a reptile. Just so you can pit a Snape against it!
ambitiousnygrl 17
Don't forget Hermione the Hermit Crab! :)
XcuzimsotiredX 25
Ron the weasel too
Yongchi 11
So? I'm sure he wont stop seeing you just because you said that. He probably though it was funny. Have some humour, woman.
HiddenValley 5
Don't even worry about stuff like that. It shouldn't change what he thinks about you.
mystashisgone 6
I agree this would have made me laugh and prolly liked op more. I don't see the fml here.
YepThatsMeee 23
In fact it will just make him realize you're a little nervous, which will make him realize you like him. Unless he's an idiot.
Dory123 9
Well who doesn't like Dumbledore!! Hopefully he had a sense if humor and laughed. :D
sens3sfailing 25
Malfoy.