Today, I went to see a fortune teller. She said one of my closest friends will die soon because of me. Frightened I hurried home to avoid meeting anyone I know. At home I found my goldfish floating on it's back. Apparently I forgot to feed my closest friend for the past 3 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9654) - you totally deserved it (35034)
On 05/16/2009 at 8:21am - misc - by killer (woman) - Latvia (Riga)
(0)those are so dumb hahaha why would you believe that you just payed a lady to make something up and hope it happens
#141 - On 06/04/2010 at 10:48pm by victoria4161993
(0)I believe in that stuff. but you have to get a person that knows wht their doing
#144 - On 06/26/2010 at 9:23pm by cellerbeck
(0)You can't even keep a goldfish alive? Shit, those are the easiest animals to take care of!
#4 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:08pm by designedlikedice
(0)A fish doesn't die if it isn't fed for three days. It must have had something else wrong with it.
(0)A fish doesnt die because you dont feed it for 3 days. When I had fish I went months without feeding them...
(0)Don't buy goldfish unless they wear sunglasses. Duh.
#11 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:14pm by ravinderkaler
(0)Well. At least your "real" friends are safe, and now you believe in fortune tellers! We all win! Yay coincidences!
#13 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:16pm by juliadream
(0)Aren't they more likely to die from over feeding rather than under feeding?
#17 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:19pm by catatonicsleep
(0)You deserved it, for being stupid enough to go to a fortune teller, and even more stupid for actually being frightened by his/her words.
(0)i agree with the above guys, your life is fucked because your closest friend is...was... a damn fish.
(0)Fortune Teller's are so full of shit. You are an absolute idiot for believing their words. They prey on people's fears to make money. They are the biggest thieves around and nobody does anything about it.
(0)Double fail!!
P.S. I'm in need of some cash...can I tell your fortunes? Here's a freebie: at some point during the night, your heart will slow down while sleeping...BEWARE!!
#24 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:29pm by potentpotable
(0)This is almost as retarded as the girl that posted an FML about a mood ring and her cat.
I hope you don't have any furry pets, seeing as you're too incompetent to care for a goldfish.
#29 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:39pm by Nakedsquirrel
(0)when fish live in the wild they dont eat everyday.... so either this is BS or your fish died another way. either way mkes your story moot! sorry
#31 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:41pm by aanderson009
(0)Wow you are such a douche lmao, your closest friend is a fish? YDI
#33 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:51pm by Devin_Duke
(0)Pffft...Lmfao #31
I had a goldfish for one day and.........It died. ;[
I have bad luck with fishies......And apparently so do you =]
(0)FYL for having a goldfish as a closest friend.
YDI for not feeding your closest friend.
#38 - On 05/16/2009 at 2:58pm by mimimi
(0)Your life is fucked for two reasons. 1) you can't even take care of a goldfish 2) you take fortune teller seriously.
#40 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:01pm by robvicious
(0)"Apparently I forgot to feed my closest friend"
Your closest friend was a goldfish. LOL
#42 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:03pm by Dont_tase_me_bro
(0)That's weird. Idk if this should be a FYL bcuz ur fish is ur best friend or a YDI bcuz ur best friend prbly wouldn't have died if it were a person.
(0)Hahahaha, oh man. Thats why Ill never go to a fortune teller
#44 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:15pm by Ilovelife07
(0)no wonder why a goldfish is your closest friend.. youre so irresponsible you cant even remember to feed a fish once a day
#45 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:16pm by taureau139
(0)All the people who are saying that his goldfish is his best friend, just shut the fuck up.
Don't you get the term for dogs, mans best friend, well thats what hes practically trying to say excpet with a fish.
Fuckin noobs
#47 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:17pm by roflbubbles
(0)What did that poor goldfish ever do to deserve this? ITS YOUR OWN DAMN FAULT.
#50 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:38pm by SteelersGirl
(0)your best friend is a goldfish!?
Dont worry though... it doesnt know who u are since goldfish only have a memory span of 3 seconds.
(0)your closest as in best friend or as in distance close? because if it was your best friend and you killed it, you're a bad friend :(
#52 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:46pm by thattickles
(0)Couldn't have been that close of a friend if you forgot to feed it for three days.
#54 - On 05/16/2009 at 3:52pm by blankslate
(0)Fish can easily go without food for days. It probably had more to do with your tank.
#57 - On 05/16/2009 at 4:11pm by wastintime
(0)The FML is that your goldfish is your closest friend.
#61 - On 05/16/2009 at 4:22pm by thelonelylurker
(0)Actually, maybe fortune tellers AREN'T so full of shit. After all, she was right. One of your friends did die, hahaha! xD
(0)You're a stupid fucking bitch for believing in fortune tellers. Your life is fucked because you spent a single penny trying to figure out some dumb ass fucking shit
#63 - On 05/16/2009 at 4:30pm by dallascowboys
you are a sick person you know that!!!!!!!! beat that people!!!!!
ANIMAL ABUSE IS BAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#64 - On 05/16/2009 at 4:50pm by Rawrasaur
(0)of course she's going to tell u that you're gonna do something dumb like that. it's obvious that anyone dumb enough to go to and trust a fortune teller is going to be dumb enough to kill something like that.
Sorry, my friend got on my account.
What I wanted to say was:
You stupid idiot! You should have taken 3 damn minutes out of your day to feed the damn goldfish!
YDI, you idiot.
#66 - On 05/16/2009 at 4:56pm by Rawrasaur
#21 is right haha
that's the first thing i though
and #66 a goldfish can survive for three days without food... it was probably just old.
#67 - On 05/16/2009 at 5:02pm by theoldGP
(0)i lol'd.
i had a betta...forgot to feed it for nearly 2 months, never noticed it was dead. lol.
#70 - On 05/16/2009 at 5:15pm by burrito_supreme
(0)You fail for these three reasons:
1. For actually believing a fortune teller.
2. For having a best friend who is stupider than an infant.
3. For neglecting your 'best friend'.
(0)you are a sad, pathetic waste of air and human life. GTFO of the gene pool, NAO
#74 - On 05/16/2009 at 5:29pm by gregthestrange
(0)YDI, mainly for going to see a Fortune Teller.
How stupid do you have to be to believe the crap they say?!
(0)well at least you know you could trust that fortune teller :)
#77 - On 05/16/2009 at 6:16pm by bella_brasil
(0)This story is amazing!
Seriously, how does someone who believes in psychics have the brainpower to navigate the internet?
(0)I agree with everyone else. FYL because: a) Your best mate is a goldfish b) You believe in fortune tellers and c) because your fish snuffed it.
#81 - On 05/16/2009 at 6:47pm by ChelseaChops
(0)YDI for
1. Going to a fortune teller
2. Being a neglectful pet owner. Please, don't buy any more pets.
(0)Uh, a goldfish doesn't die for fasting three days. It was sick.
lol, and FYL for your BFF being a fish!
#86 - On 05/16/2009 at 8:52pm by Horsegal
(0)actually goldfish die pretty easy, but you didn't feed it for three days so YDI. poor fishy... :*(
#87 - On 05/16/2009 at 8:58pm by kandi_shop_xoxo
(0)You deserve it for believing a fortune teller. Way to be dumb.
#89 - On 05/16/2009 at 9:00pm by poeticpunk77
(0)I think the real problem here is that that waccky psychic isn't working elsewhere making big bucks. Obviously she/he knew your best friend had scales and lived in a bowl.
(0)Fortune tellers are full of bullshit. All they do is make broad generalizations, and then they make them more specific when you tell them more things. Total Bullshit.
(0)#14: im thinking this person doesn't have 'real friends' since its best one happens to be a fish.
#5: fish die like 4 days after you get them sometimes
**id stay away from fortune tellers for a while**
#93 - On 05/16/2009 at 10:51pm by justxdream
(0)Fish dying fail. Most fish, especially a goldfish, can last more than a week with no food. It was obviously already sick. If you forgot to feed it for that long however, how long have you gone without changing its water!?
(0)maybe you idiots, she meant closest as in...the closest one to him distance wise since it lives in his house. its a nice play on words.
#95 - On 05/17/2009 at 12:08am by beauty_blogger
(0)I don't know what's more pathetic, you forgetting to feed your goldfish for three whole days, or you actually believing a fortune teller. (even though she was right in this case)
#96 - On 05/17/2009 at 12:09am by Thrashmeister
(0)you fail on so many levels
my goldfish lived for 3 weeks without food
im also beginning to think that psychics are geniuses.
of course they cant tell the future or any shit like that, but people still keep going because they know they can always make money by roping in idiots like you.
(0)OMG! Why isn't anyone saying that AT LEAST IT WAS A GOLDFISH AND NOT ONE OF YOUR HUMAN FRIENDS? GEEZ... you got lucky.
#99 - On 05/17/2009 at 1:13am by whitneyleigh144
(0)The fact that you believe what fortune tellers say might be a reason for why you dont have friends.
(0)It is impossible for a fish to die from only three days without food. It would be like a human dying because he missed breakfast. Its more likely that your fish died because the water was too dirty. You are supposed to change it now and then you tard.
(0)who actually believes in fortune tellers? everything they say is crap
#107 - On 05/17/2009 at 8:38am by teamhat
(0)You should have said its instead of it's (saying it's back is like saying it is back)
#108 - On 05/17/2009 at 10:54am by cheese1756
(0)"Today is the third day, my owner hasn't fed me, I'm getting really woozy. That owner even went to a fortune teller." FML
Goldfish:
#109 - On 05/17/2009 at 12:35pm by godisthatyou
(0)I don't know what's worse- the fact that you forgot to feed for fish for three days in a row or the fact that a fish is one of your closest friends.
(0)Anyone stupid enough to pay to go to a fortune teller should not have another live entrusted to him.
(0)"today it has been tree days since my last meal, my best friend is supposed to feed me every day... i think i see a white light.... i should have chosen a better best friend". FML
(0)I Hate fuckin goldfish. stupid things die if ya look at 'em funny. they never last long.
#113 - On 05/17/2009 at 1:40pm by DangerousBabee
(0)gold fish dont even eat!
ahahahha
i had a goldfish for like a year and never fed it ever
#114 - On 05/17/2009 at 1:55pm by fivealive143
(0)Gold fish can live without eating for a whole week.
#115 - On 05/17/2009 at 3:59pm by warmvanillasugar
(0)i agree with # 1, and lol #113 ...btw its not that much of an FML that ur goldfish died but that ur goldfish was one of ur closest friends
lol
dork
#116 - On 05/17/2009 at 6:48pm by Cg3780byoch
(0)Everyone who is saying the goldfish is his best friend, you're all idiots. He said the goldfish was his "closest" friend, as in it's a friend and it's literally close to him because it's in his room! Read carefully before you make stupid comments.
(0)Well it was stupid of you to be that scared in the first place. But if this really happened, then three things are true:
1. You are a loser.
2. Your mom is probably a loser too.
3. Fortune tellers can sometimes be right.
(0)At least it was only a goldfish and not one of your human friends.
#122 - On 05/17/2009 at 11:36pm by hellinahandbag
(0)@108: Thank you. IT'S nice to the the whole world isn't retarded.
#124 - On 05/18/2009 at 9:24am by Proxgotsthafia
(0)Dude....wow?!?
what fortune teller did you go to?
#128 - On 05/24/2009 at 10:14pm by Such_A_HartBreak
(0)Your goldfish.... Is your closest friend?? Fyl!!! Rofl!!
#132 - On 06/14/2009 at 8:59pm by paleknight47
(0)i think the real FML here is the fact that you best friend is a goldfish. a non talking non moving anywhere boring goldfish. you have issues.
(0)You're from Latvia! :D
But no srsly, wtf. :| How do you forget to feed fish? They're just sitting there, being ugly. THey haunt your dreams like Putin.
(0)?? wow no offence but u soun like a loser still living in his moms basement. get some friends!! lol dont forget to feed your fish!!
(0)your goldfish is your closest friend?! and you take fortune tellers seriously?! FYL. and YDI.
#137 - On 08/11/2009 at 12:15am by Guitarist45
