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Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

#761206 (364)

I agree, your life sucks (104004) - you totally deserved it (26196)

On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

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Anonymous's life also sucks

Guilt also deserved it

Comments

HOLY FUCKING SHIT, NEW FAVORITE FML!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahah I WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND.

#2 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:06am by It_Doesnt_Matter

omg, go get a girl tmrw and prove her wrong

#322 - On 07/01/2009 at 2:56pm by tgd4444

You honestly couldn't spell out the word tomorrow?

#339 - On 10/11/2009 at 1:36am by GreenHacker

OMFG DOOD HAHAHAHA

#341 - On 10/25/2009 at 11:37pm by JTron

Oh my god. Best FML ever.

#3 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:07am by Alteffor

seriously, you have the greatest mom on earth!

#4 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:07am by phillip1337

Hahaha, owned.

#5 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:08am by zap

ok so the whole website had been going to hell but this just made up for the past week of suckiness!

#6 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:11am by asortafairtale

That is the funniest thing I have ever read on FML!!

You Mum rocks! Tell her from us she has the best sense of humour! OMFG!! :o))

...I guess it's too late now to point out to you that if you don't want your Mum to know you whack off into your socks, you prolly shouldn't put them into the wash all full of cum?

#7 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:12am by tipple

Hahhahhahhaahahhhahaahhahahahaa

#8 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:13am by nastynate

Well, that is probably one of the funniest things I've ever heard. Go mom.

#10 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:14am by Well_thats_funny

And the sad thing is: you'll probably use it and pretend she's real...

#11 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:15am by a201

lol yeah he would

#314 - On 06/19/2009 at 12:24pm by xstaticdelta

LMAO, sucks for you, but this is hilarious.

#12 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:15am by loveaddiction

Probably the best thing I have read on here in a week

#13 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:15am by JHunz

hahaha wow that made me giggle. :D i mean... sucks for you, and i would have DIED if i were a guy and that happened to me..

but you gotta admit- it is hilarious.
i commend your mom on her sense of humor.

#14 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:17am by meridon

This comment has been moderated.

#15 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:18am by jprybylski

HAHAHAHA! Your mom is awesome!

#16 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:18am by UnCensoredBitch

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! oh my god ive been lolin for 10 min now and im still!!!

#17 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:19am by Nuell

awww ur mom so loves you look at that haha. i mean it was type fucked up but who knows maybe she had good intentions

#18 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:19am by revezone

HAHAHAHAAHAHHA OMG THAT IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD

#19 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:24am by jillian_xx

how many people jerk off in a sock? seriously.
ps. your mom's awesome.

#20 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:28am by Jasper

HAHAH your mom is awesome.

#21 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:28am by rachel_anna

Omg that's gotta be the best mom ever.

#22 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:30am by BigLord

That is amazing!!! A lady with that kind of humor about sexuality is probably a great lay too. She single?

#23 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:30am by devils69

HAHA!! LOVE IT! does your mom need a new BFF? Cause she sounds AWESOME =D

#24 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:32am by kelseysue92

ROFL!! Your mom FTW!!

But seriously.. a sock?? Wouldn't that chaff if you have a particularly strenuous wank? And what about if there is any toe jam in the sock. Give yourself a nice fungus infection down there before you even have sex!

#25 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:32am by Jimboom

Wow I can't stop laughing. Thank your mom for it. I mean it must take a lot of love and compassion for her to even just touch it. Not to mention spending time doing crazy crafting skills to it. She must love you very much.

#26 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:33am by il08ty

wow, that is fucking excellent. KUDOS MA!

#27 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:33am by yesmy_love

That's sweet.

#28 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:33am by smokegrindsleep

Go find her vibrator and grab a sharpie and draw a face with a moustache on it, revenge my friend, revenge

#29 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:35am by tehhotness

haha nice

#316 - On 06/23/2009 at 2:24am by yourmumzaman

I picture a purple vibrating bullet that looks like Mario.

#365 - On 02/03/2010 at 1:43am by Derkek

haha your mom's funny

#30 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:37am by Safko

I fucking love your mom. Fav'd!

#31 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:38am by Amkii

This comment has been moderated.

#32 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:39am by trucanadian

Hahahaha. I'm in love with your mum!

#33 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:44am by Equinox987

LMAO! #29!

#34 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:46am by UnCensoredBitch

LOL

#35 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:48am by Jo324

I'm a guy and I never understood using a sock...

#36 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:48am by galad2003

Ew.... wait did she pick it up and do that when it was still ... soiled? Either this is fake or your mom is fucking gross. I don't get why people think this is awesome. It's disturbing.

#37 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:48am by SpunkT

maybe she found it in the wash and knew it was his?

#321 - On 07/01/2009 at 1:07pm by aubz6391

I bet his mum is a Milf too :D

#38 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:51am by d347hm4n

loves it

#39 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:51am by SW11

:P
lol
Best FML in a while. xD

#40 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:52am by pinkfrenchrose

Hahahaha, your mom is amazing!

#41 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:59am by puhffft

who the fuck uses a sock???

#42 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:59am by victimofchanges

#37,

I think anyone's mom has cleaned worse things than that kind of "soil," plus almost any mom would do anything to make their kids feel better, just saying.....

#43 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:00am by minervastoy

oh that's rich.
that's so rich.

#44 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:01am by areyoukiddingme

Maybe if you name it Pinocchio it might become a real girl one day?

#45 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:01am by AliSama

Hahaha omg! That's awesome if it's true.

But dude, why are you wanking into a sock?! Wtf? Hope you don't expect your mum to clean it for you!

#46 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:02am by babydoll86

wow....owned by your mom...so how does rock bottom feel?

#47 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:04am by godawgs313

Your mother is the coolest ever.

#48 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:09am by MrJentipede

Guys, you dont effin use the sock to wank. You just use it as a reciptical ...

#49 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:09am by jm88

This comment has been moderated.

#50 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:10am by nolubba1037

LLLLLOOOOOLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love your Momz! She is awsome.
Sucks to be you though,Buddy.

Goodluck at the dinner table tonight!

#51 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:11am by Blaq

If you're old enough to wack it, you're old enough to do your own laundry.

Which I hope was Mom's (somewhat passive-aggressive) point here.

#52 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:13am by wholeon

Be careful. She might have put hot sauce or something in there as an april fools joke and the face on it was all a distraction. Thats what I would do. :-P

#53 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:13am by Jimboom

Your mom is a badass. That is just full of awesome.

#54 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:21am by Ibeapirate

Your mother is prolly one of the coolest people ever. I hope you laughed when she said that. HAHAHAH I love it!

#55 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:23am by dumbdumb

That is HILARIOUS. At least your mom didn't freak out or something... could have been worse, but still way embarrassing!

#56 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:25am by ammali

Oh my GOD that is the greatest thing I have EVER HEARD EVER. Your mom wins everything ever.
XD

#57 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:31am by CinnamonSpider

HAHAHAHAH YOUR MOM IS AWESOME.

#58 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:33am by audiogasmic

Bahahahaha your mom sounds freakin awesome....LOVE IT!!!

#59 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:35am by ellebell

HAHHHHHHHHHHAHHAHAHAH! That's awesome! Does your mom put the sock on your hand and wack you off?

#60 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:35am by sizemattic

This is the greatest thing I've ever heard.

#61 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:40am by laycee23

hahahahahahaha by far the coolest mom ever

#62 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:45am by unseen

lmao!

#63 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:52am by holdmyhand

Oh wow, that sucks.

#64 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:52am by alex_vik

That'a boy! U pimp that new sock! Wooooo

#65 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:59am by mikej1985

Omg, this is epic funny. Let's be friends!!! Hahahahaha XD

#66 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:00pm by Why_Me77

Lots of parent pwnage lately.

This one is win.

:)

#67 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:00pm by jSOPURE

I agree with everyone above me. HAHAHAAHAHA.. bahahahahah... aaaaahahahahahahahahahah LMFAO that was good. Your mom. Wow. Your mom is fucking awesome. Is she single? I'm hookin her up with my dad.

#68 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:01pm by cadenernest

This comment has been moderated.

#69 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:01pm by unbelievable1

Hahahaha. Best FML ever!!

#70 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:02pm by ozac

Your mom is amazing!!! She is my new BFF

#71 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:04pm by Bee4594

ummmm #69 a lot of people do it...get over yourself...i mean really.....


and to the OP Great MOM mate :)

#72 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:05pm by Yuuhi

are you joking 69 (lol, 69). It sure beats having to clean your load off of everything it launches onto

#73 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:06pm by tehhotness

HAHAHHAHAHAHAAH that is HILARIOUS

#74 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:08pm by arm89

To #25 seriously, the term 'toe jam' made me gag, but it's so brilliant I may have to use it in the next conversation I have.

This is the kind of mum I want to be when I grow up! Using arts and crafts to get your point across!

Brilliant.

#75 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:10pm by SuperMeron

HAHAHHAHAHHAH

#76 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:11pm by effmalife

yea.....definitely calling BS on this

#77 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:11pm by jackoffasaur

LOL --this one's right up there with 'Jesus pin through the condom' Mom!!

#78 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:15pm by Jensterrr

im with everyone else on this- this is freakin' awesome! ima make this my fav as well

#79 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:16pm by mac

OMG , HAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHA
ROFLROFLROFLROFLROFLROFL .
I LOVE YOUR MOM !
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ,
I ALMOST PEE'D MYSELF .
LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO .

#80 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:18pm by dammn

Oh shit, son, your mom fuckin' roasted your ass!

#81 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:22pm by blackbetty

Your mom is kind of amazing.

#82 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:31pm by quietjune

At least your mom has a sense of humor

#83 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:40pm by Fuck34

moms always got your back

#84 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:47pm by vers

HAHAHA HAHAHAHA HAHAHA. Nice!

#85 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:48pm by lillyass

Lol, did she cut the mouth hole out for you? =P

What a kind mother XD

#86 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:50pm by 666midnight

Awww
Your momma loves you
:D

#87 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:58pm by JillianIsLoveee

That's actually kind of sweet

#88 - On 04/02/2009 at 12:59pm by el211

Oh shit. That is awesome.

#89 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:04pm by MelancholySpork

ewwwww, your mom touched your sperm!

#90 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:08pm by AlexJakubsen1

Someone give your mom a high five.

#91 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:15pm by Nakedsquirrel

FANTASTIC! Your mom rocks my socks... and yours.

#92 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:18pm by Etc80

aww your mom is so sweet!! lol

#93 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:19pm by who_rollerpig

Epic win for your mom

#94 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:21pm by davidtheday

so freaking hilarious. your mom is my new hero :)

#95 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:25pm by hahah808

LMAO!!!! wow, i officially love your mom!!!! AHAHAHAA!!!

#96 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:28pm by theluckygirl28

Hahaha, awesome

#97 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:34pm by marti

I love your mom! lol

#98 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:39pm by eternalwait

OOOWWWWW BURRRRRNNNN! thats a really good one:)

#99 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:40pm by bigbill245

Your mom is awesome! xD

#100 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:44pm by themangostar

oh god, if I ever have kids, I want to be the sort of parent your mum is!

she totally owned you

edit: forgot about the weblink. Ignore it.

#101 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:45pm by Jonny_1

I'm with #52, it's time to start cleaning your own socks!
Humiliation: best tool in a parent's arsenal.

#102 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:51pm by MiriamSingsLoud

Best FML ever

#103 - On 04/02/2009 at 1:54pm by deadeyes

mom for the win, you got burned son...

#104 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:14pm by thekreeperkeeper

now everytime you jerk it, you're gonna think about how your mom drew that face on the sock.

#105 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:15pm by senseless228

Completely owned.
This does make up for the recent fml's.
Niiice. Kudos to your mama. xD
Now its just your turn to figure out some way of revenge in return.

#106 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:23pm by xRockerx

HAHAHA! Your mom rocks :D
Find a girl... or at least use toilet paper!

#107 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:23pm by Cileitz

Your mom is my hero! That is so awesome, you got owned!

and seriously...a sock?...come on

#108 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:36pm by Floridaguy81

I loled.

#109 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:36pm by FoundManyLemons

Great mom.

#110 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:41pm by gmnotyet

Hehe, kinda funny, I feel sorry for you though.

#111 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:56pm by Otium

Lmfao, this is brilliant.

#112 - On 04/02/2009 at 2:57pm by greedy_dead_soul

If you're gonna jack off into your socks, at least do your own laundry. Do you really think your mom doesn't know what dried spooge looks like? That's she's gonna think it's dried snot? She doesn't want to see the evidence of your sexuality any more than you'd want to see the evidence of hers. Show some respect.

#113 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:02pm by birds

What a nice mother.

#114 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:03pm by EffedUp

LOL HAHA!!!

#115 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:04pm by danny_

ROFLMAO!!!!!!AHAHAHA i love ur mom!

#116 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:07pm by snzizle

Who invited Captain Bringdown #113?

#117 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:12pm by tehhotness

owned

#118 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:12pm by permission2laugh

lmao that's absolutely incredible

#119 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:21pm by woahcomments

I love your mom.

#120 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:21pm by allieg

LMFAOOOO

#121 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:22pm by breathemein

That is an awesome mom!

#122 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:27pm by thebronx

XD! Deserved!

#123 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:28pm by sleepykid00

HILARIOUS.

#124 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:29pm by sLap

Hahaha, your mom wins.

#125 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:37pm by Jaxro

OMFG thats hilarious
FUL my friend, FUL

at least she was funny about it eh?

#126 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:44pm by vampirecmb

haha, i think i love your mom ;D

#127 - On 04/02/2009 at 3:58pm by nbrachelxo

OMG your mom is awesome.

#128 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:00pm by truelyajerk

LMFAO that is awesome

#129 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:00pm by xlucklessloverx

LMAO. do u have any siblings, if so; it was prolly one of them :P but thts still funny! xD

#130 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:07pm by xoGurlxo

You should hope you inherit her sense of humor. God, this is epic.

#131 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:15pm by quesoesbueno59

Wow, that's cold...

#132 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:20pm by nuga

shit I didn't know you could use a sock while you're jerking it, it all makes sense now, more comfort, no mess, the next time I see an album on facebook of some girls in my school, hello sock drawer

#133 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:21pm by alex_smokin_okin

this is one of the best FML's
lmfaoooo thats blows dude

#134 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:28pm by ben26

LOL OWNED!
And #29 is a genius hahaha.

#135 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:28pm by craznazn247

BURN!!!

#136 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:31pm by Mr_Wong

LMFAO hahahahahaha

#138 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:38pm by Gaston

Why do you wack off into a sock? Is it a clean sock at least...or the sweaty smelly one you've worn all day?

#139 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:42pm by bumkeun

HAHA excellent

#140 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:46pm by dearladydisdain

take a hint?

#141 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:48pm by omgoodnesswtf

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!

#142 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:48pm by sunni_93

this is the best.

#143 - On 04/02/2009 at 4:49pm by vanityaffair

#29: GENIUS!!!!!

#144 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:04pm by well_this_sucks

sounds HOT..u now have a new sock to use!
how cute....but SOO awkward??
its funny but kind of embarassing haha

#145 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:13pm by cyndyv

wait...how did your mom know you were whackin off with that particular sock?
and how do you whack off with a sock?
...wouldn't that...hurt?

#146 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:37pm by FMLover269

cant believe parents actually do those kind of things...

#147 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:41pm by nerd123456789

you have a cool mom

#148 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:42pm by mother_green7

EEEEEEEWWWWWW!!!!!!

yo mama touched your spooge sock

#149 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:42pm by G_Bug

LOL brilliant

#150 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:51pm by heeygurl

your mom has the best sense of humour of any mother ever.

#151 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:51pm by TokyoSquid

Your life is fucked my friend.
Now when you can never ever buy socks with your mom ever again.
I bet she will tell her friends and now you will have to run away from socks from this day forward just so the embarrassment of what your mom did will ever come up in a story of hers.

:D
FYL

#152 - On 04/02/2009 at 5:59pm by SergioFML

lmaoooooooooooo
GO MOM!

#153 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:05pm by sliimxshady

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
that's hilarious. best FML ever.

#154 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:07pm by musicloverr

f**kin' hilarious

#155 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:14pm by ryan__h

LMFAO. Your mother's fucking amazing!

#156 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:15pm by calkyulus

Your mom is awesome XDDD

#157 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:20pm by isantorin

Ownnnnned by Mama.

#158 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:25pm by idontsinkso34

I would make sweet, sweet love to your mother.

#159 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:31pm by chrispaul444

you have an awesome mother with great sense of humor!!!!

#160 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:46pm by plstkstr

hahaha dude, thats hilarious, your mom is awesome

#161 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:48pm by shadow_moses

effing hilarious. your mom is AWESOME!
bahahaha!

#162 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:49pm by limabean3

o wow that is disturbing

#163 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:53pm by ambisaurus

all i can say is wow. That's great though lol.

#164 - On 04/02/2009 at 6:59pm by Tick

that is a funny mom XD

#165 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:12pm by Stainless

LMFAO!!! Your mom is awesome!

#166 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:18pm by lolo527

haha your mom's funny

#167 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:18pm by tr1x_

haha wow your mom is kind of creepy...funny tho!

#168 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:22pm by louisianagrrrrl

OUCH.
hahahha.
but ouch.

#169 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:28pm by citruslatte

XDD this is the funniest thing I've heard in a while. Thank you so much for making my day. ahahaha.

#170 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:30pm by xOpheliacx

I so want to be your friend.

#171 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:34pm by alwaysloveashxx

...I guess you two won't be sock shopping together anytime soon.
Your mom is amazing - new best friend :D

This is one of the funniest FMLs on the site.
Much better than, "They called me ugly. FML."
::continues to laugh hysterically::

#172 - On 04/02/2009 at 7:57pm by marykateex3

hahahahh your mom is hilarious

#173 - On 04/02/2009 at 8:11pm by rawr12

I LOVE YOUR MOM!

#174 - On 04/02/2009 at 8:18pm by geekizoid

Your mom is freaking hilarious.

#175 - On 04/02/2009 at 8:29pm by kiwie

This is still the funniest FML I've ever read!!

If I hadn't been whacking off into a Santa Hat at the time, I would have jizzed my pants!!

Yeah - give your Mom a high-five from all of us!

#176 - On 04/02/2009 at 8:42pm by tipple

hahahahahahahahaha,

#177 - On 04/02/2009 at 8:55pm by babyyx

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA.
omg. your mom WINS.

#178 - On 04/02/2009 at 8:59pm by lol_everyday

Dude, your mom is awesome.

Still, I sympathize.

#179 - On 04/02/2009 at 9:07pm by Ezzie

Good to know your mom cares.

#180 - On 04/02/2009 at 9:16pm by g1narrgh

haha ur mom gets the most awesome mom award for that one

#181 - On 04/02/2009 at 9:21pm by brandnew02

Mom Cares :)

#182 - On 04/02/2009 at 9:22pm by g1narrgh

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO that is horrifying and hilarious.

#183 - On 04/02/2009 at 9:40pm by justjayit

lmaooo hahah.
that made my day.

#184 - On 04/02/2009 at 9:45pm by starvingxartist

Dude, this is low.
Still, I'll agree with the lot... your mom's one of the coolest ever.

#185 - On 04/02/2009 at 9:59pm by citizenvish

What a hero.

#186 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:08pm by Kilowo

Your mom is freaking awesome.
Ahaha.
:3

#187 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:18pm by Bunbu

I lol'd.

#188 - On 04/02/2009 at 10:56pm by troubledshampoo

U have a very funny mom, new fav fml

#189 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:15pm by Ivy

Hilarious. Still, who the hell wants to whack off in a sock? I never understood that. It sounds so painful.

#190 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:23pm by Ryelle

You do it in a sock??? You sick puppy!

#191 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:26pm by ditlihi

Your mom has the best sense of humor ever.

#192 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:33pm by love_revived

Don't worry man, its not just you, although your mom's approach is certainly more creative than the average mom's approach to making fun of their lonely sons.

#193 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:55pm by mecha

That's what you get for jacking off into a sock!

#194 - On 04/02/2009 at 11:56pm by Shihaby

your mom = all life
wow
she is god
she wins the internet everything
bring your mom to my house now.. and post a pic of ur spooge sock oh lordy this uber fail epic fail epic win uber win i love this
********************** MYYYYYYYYYYYY LIFEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE **********************************

#195 - On 04/03/2009 at 12:02am by mathews666

LAMO THAT IS SO FREEKIN FUNNY

#196 - On 04/03/2009 at 12:08am by jpro

HAHAHAAHAHAAHHAHA
your mom is hilarious

#197 - On 04/03/2009 at 12:14am by noele299

I use my socks too...

#198 - On 04/03/2009 at 12:19am by Dragnf1y

Oh my god your mom is awesome.

#199 - On 04/03/2009 at 12:23am by kitkatkelly

aww your mom is cute.

#200 - On 04/03/2009 at 12:29am by boogerbear

your mm loves you enough to make you a girl.....
Aww motherly love!
Your mom is a G.

#201 - On 04/03/2009 at 1:19am by Stellaritsmeg

HAHAHA your mum rules.

#202 - On 04/03/2009 at 1:37am by everyonehatesyou

Dude that's EPIC! lmao that's funny as hell dude.

#203 - On 04/03/2009 at 2:09am by Jack_Of_Spades

sounds like a very hip mom, did she model it for you?

#204 - On 04/03/2009 at 3:14am by nodbor

awwwww so sweet of her....

#205 - On 04/03/2009 at 3:49am by hat

Dude. Tissue.

#206 - On 04/03/2009 at 3:59am by Tsukasa

LMFAO #29!! haha genius
I'm sorry pero a burn from your mom just makes this 80 million times more funny. HAHAHA!

#207 - On 04/03/2009 at 4:20am by Bella_x

LOL.

#209 - On 04/03/2009 at 6:25am by fetussammich

that is really excellent, your mum rules

#210 - On 04/03/2009 at 6:30am by ideataxi

THIS IS SO GREAAAAATTTT.
i love your mom =]
ahahhahaha its so hilarious. i literally just laughed outloud.
you seriously just made my day.

#211 - On 04/03/2009 at 8:15am by theoldGP

Bahahahahahaha! your mom burned you, man! Maybe now you will go out on the town and find someone with a little less thread count.

#212 - On 04/03/2009 at 8:49am by DankJemo

HAHAHAH moms are seriously the most awkward creatures to grace this planet.

#213 - On 04/03/2009 at 9:23am by woooaaaaa

hahahaha you have a GREAT mom! lol

#214 - On 04/03/2009 at 9:36am by f_ckerdef_ck

LOLOLOLOL!!11!!1

Your mom rockz my sockz~

#215 - On 04/03/2009 at 10:13am by El_Oh_El

hahahaha
your mom is ballin

#216 - On 04/03/2009 at 1:36pm by dcapp

hahahaha your mom rock..!

#217 - On 04/03/2009 at 2:12pm by Yoya

Instant favorite FML.

Your mom wins.

#218 - On 04/03/2009 at 2:13pm by takran

Fucking hilarious! Your mother is my new favorite person. :]

#219 - On 04/03/2009 at 2:26pm by TheNameless

Hey, look on the brightside, now you have 219 comments on how awesome your mom is. Oh wait...that's bad.

LOL.

#220 - On 04/03/2009 at 2:40pm by IamSpartacus

LOL !!!!!!!!!!!! Your mom is awesome hahaha

#221 - On 04/03/2009 at 4:04pm by Truce25

that is the funniest thing i think i've ever heard!

#222 - On 04/03/2009 at 4:29pm by Dbackkick4

HA HA HA, OH WOW

#223 - On 04/03/2009 at 6:06pm by earwig12

Maybe not a girl but who cares, your mom rocks!

#224 - On 04/03/2009 at 6:37pm by Radiohead

Jaja! your mom's awsome! i mean at least she didnt giv you som sex talk

#225 - On 04/03/2009 at 7:23pm by Maximus16

Haha, that would be really embarrassing, but it sounds like your mom has a good sense of humor. If you want to shock her back, you can always just decorate another sock and bring it to dinner one night: "Mom, I'd like you to meet my new girlfriend."

#226 - On 04/03/2009 at 9:15pm by 12frisbees

LMFAO.
NICE.

#227 - On 04/03/2009 at 10:23pm by Liliith

that is fucking horrible. sorry to hear man

#228 - On 04/03/2009 at 11:09pm by evolveahimsa

Oh my god!!!!!!!!
Best fucking FML ever!

That is one damn awesome mom you have.
Put a picture of some real ugly chick on a sock and leave it on your bed next :P

#229 - On 04/04/2009 at 12:20am by IMz0r

sooo... did u use it again ? XD

#230 - On 04/04/2009 at 12:44am by Linx

ha what would make this even more hilarious is if u were gay XD

#231 - On 04/04/2009 at 12:46am by Linx

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
OMFG. THAT'S WONDERFUL. YOUR MOM IS GREAT.
THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER HAHAHAH.

#232 - On 04/04/2009 at 4:28am by ashleyy

hahahaha.....you have an awesome mom

#233 - On 04/04/2009 at 6:15am by annis

PWN3D!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#234 - On 04/04/2009 at 11:53am by qwerty123456789

hahahaha your mom is HILARIOUS!!!!

#235 - On 04/04/2009 at 1:53pm by Bongi

Lmao, props to your mom!

#236 - On 04/04/2009 at 2:27pm by l33tm0nk3y

lol! sorry, but thats soo funny!

#237 - On 04/04/2009 at 3:24pm by anonymousssss

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH YOUR MOM IS AWESOME!

#238 - On 04/04/2009 at 3:33pm by lolcorez

ROFL This is EPIC

#239 - On 04/04/2009 at 10:11pm by Whitenight

This just made my day XD

#240 - On 04/04/2009 at 10:57pm by Jackjack15

OH LAWDY LAWD.

#241 - On 04/04/2009 at 11:42pm by Audio828

HAHAHAH! ROFLMAOBBQOBGYN!

I just hoped she used gloves.

#242 - On 04/04/2009 at 11:46pm by SirAndrew

LOL! Props to your mom!

#243 - On 04/05/2009 at 12:02am by Anon_Coconut

HAHA! Your mom is awesome. :D

#244 - On 04/05/2009 at 12:36am by Lovebug_Campbell

AHHHAHHAHHAHHAHHAH! Your mum ROCKS, man!

#245 - On 04/05/2009 at 4:09am by Athanatos

your mom's the shit! I wanna be her new best friend!

#246 - On 04/05/2009 at 6:16am by jillian1508

funny mom.

#247 - On 04/05/2009 at 2:45pm by TurtleLG

Your mom rocks!

#248 - On 04/05/2009 at 3:37pm by redhotpeppers48

This is why you use a tissue. MORONNNNN

#249 - On 04/05/2009 at 4:56pm by Mattsayshola

oh my god! best fml EVER :D

#250 - On 04/05/2009 at 5:13pm by zomgz_xx_jen

hahaha. f your moms life for finding the sock you jacked off in...ewwww

#251 - On 04/05/2009 at 7:32pm by jkilla6

probably the funniest thing i've ever read. good going mom. good going.

#252 - On 04/05/2009 at 10:24pm by cmt026

probably the funniest thing i've ever read. good going mom. good going.

#253 - On 04/05/2009 at 10:24pm by cmt026

awww isnt your mum thoughtful!

#254 - On 04/06/2009 at 2:50am by rityz

hahahaha, that's fuckin awesome!

#255 - On 04/06/2009 at 4:23pm by Common_Sense

hahahaha owned
i love your mom

#256 - On 04/06/2009 at 5:25pm by AClife

And think, in abut ten years when your mom saves the sock and introduces your fiancee to your first girlfriend!

#257 - On 04/07/2009 at 12:22am by Warlock2019

that would suck if #257 happened. but have u ever thought of washing ur socks more often? the smell doesn't go away just cause u finished

#258 - On 04/07/2009 at 10:03am by whocaresnotme

oh. my. god. THIS IS THE BEST FML EVER.

#259 - On 04/07/2009 at 10:09am by yesbutnotyou

Hahaha, Your Mom is awesome.

#260 - On 04/08/2009 at 3:38am by Naobear

I think i love your mom. best FML ever. :D

#261 - On 04/08/2009 at 12:21pm by rainbowxtears

That's funny

way to go mom! ROFL

#262 - On 04/08/2009 at 4:08pm by were_giraffe

Mmm...

I wish I had a son to do that to.

#263 - On 04/09/2009 at 11:14pm by mrsandmrporter

Wow i can have sex with your mom?

#264 - On 04/10/2009 at 5:52pm by N0Luck

BEST EVER
I LOVE YOUR MOTHER

#265 - On 04/11/2009 at 6:20pm by ugliy

BEST FML IN A LONG TIME

#266 - On 04/12/2009 at 2:57pm by Smodes

LOL?! I would've thought that would hurt, unless the sock is, like, silk, haha.

#267 - On 04/12/2009 at 11:58pm by madelinex

man, go suicide

#268 - On 04/13/2009 at 10:40am by meozeren

BWAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH
WOW!!!!

#269 - On 04/13/2009 at 3:27pm by ZeShadow

hahahahahaha. wow. wow.

#270 - On 04/15/2009 at 3:52pm by laffytacky

ROFL, I applaud for your mom!

#271 - On 04/15/2009 at 10:03pm by ichigolyn

hahahahahaahahahhahahahahah i had to make an account for this one! priceless!

#272 - On 04/17/2009 at 1:58am by MackoD7H

I'm predicting there's a 70% chance of incest that night.

#273 - On 04/17/2009 at 6:39pm by Althalus

Your mom roxx. Ha ha ha YDI

#274 - On 04/17/2009 at 9:20pm by butterfly509

Best mom ever lol.

#275 - On 04/20/2009 at 1:34pm by kristindabomb

Am I the only one that thinks that's adorable? Your mom clearly cares a lot about you.

#276 - On 04/20/2009 at 6:07pm by darkangel550

lmao go mom. [=

#277 - On 04/20/2009 at 8:12pm by dezzxll3

omg made me create an acc LOOOOOOL

#278 - On 04/23/2009 at 11:05pm by Edd0

Holy. F***ing. Shit! That is the funniest thing I've read on this site, period. I'm still laughing. By far, best FML.

#279 - On 04/23/2009 at 11:22pm by Godhasfunwithme

ahahah your mom is hilarious.

#280 - On 04/24/2009 at 1:01pm by jj732

Fuck your sock's life.

#281 - On 04/24/2009 at 9:48pm by MaximusB

Hahahahahaha!!!!!! Dude your mom caught you by the fucking balls! Hahaha

#282 - On 04/26/2009 at 2:24pm by fblife12345

? i dont understand why guys use socks

#283 - On 04/26/2009 at 3:02pm by xxfallenangelxx

my mom would have done the same thing. FML

#284 - On 04/26/2009 at 8:40pm by JSiCw311

all time favorite!!

#285 - On 04/28/2009 at 11:26pm by JSocehy

bahahahahhahaa omg ur mom is awesome

#286 - On 04/29/2009 at 11:46pm by Laughing_is_cool

Uber pwnage!!

Man, I read this in class one day and I was laughing so hard I was surprised that I was able to keep it quiet during lecture. Man I still laugh at that!!! ROTFLMFAO

#287 - On 05/01/2009 at 9:08pm by Jakester

Aren't mom's great?

#288 - On 05/01/2009 at 10:48pm by wildabeast

haha your mama must really love you! haha

#289 - On 05/05/2009 at 10:40am by tayy1234

HAAAAAAAAAAAA! Your mom is the shit! That's hilarious, hope you find a woman! haHA , WE WANT PICS !

#290 - On 05/05/2009 at 3:27pm by AnnaT24

i can't believe your mom would touch that sock. ick.

#291 - On 05/05/2009 at 5:43pm by brittbrittT

coolest mom ever

#292 - On 05/08/2009 at 5:31pm by 0keLLy0

lol, you got pwnd by your mom.

Really? A sock? thats pathetic

#293 - On 05/10/2009 at 12:54am by erkdoc

OMG!!! i cant stop laughing!!!! lol!!! ur mom is the BEST!! :D tell her hi for me ;D

#294 - On 05/10/2009 at 1:58pm by HeatherHarris

OMG, your mom is BOMBBBBB.

#295 - On 05/10/2009 at 11:40pm by squidsleeves

omg u got absolutly pwnd by ur mom gf kid.

#296 - On 05/16/2009 at 6:37am by tjjonny2000

You have the greatest mom in the world.
Seriously.

#297 - On 05/20/2009 at 5:25am by redbluegreen

This will never get old.

#298 - On 05/25/2009 at 2:16pm by Kira

hahaha lol

#299 - On 05/27/2009 at 8:05pm by Gary_11

I literally fell on the floor with laughter AND I had the provebial tears of laughter in my eyes. I hope you got your mother an extra special present on Mother's Day because clearly she is the best. She is my new role model as my son heads towards puberty.

#300 - On 05/30/2009 at 9:51pm by enn

Best mother ever :)

#301 - On 06/02/2009 at 3:38am by ashbash1223

hahaha.

#302 - On 06/03/2009 at 12:06am by armbruster

You have the coolest mom EVER.
I want to be a mom like that when I have kids.
=]

#303 - On 06/04/2009 at 7:00pm by AnnerNanner

#29. Prefect!!!!

#304 - On 06/04/2009 at 7:03pm by AnnerNanner

just kill urself now

#305 - On 06/07/2009 at 2:25am by wrestling49

Ha ha sucks for you...but that's funny as hell...

#306 - On 06/07/2009 at 9:15pm by djh1996

LMAO..that was so funny that I registered here just to comment on this..Oh my gosh..that is the best!! I'm sorry, but I think your Mom rocks!! ;)

#307 - On 06/09/2009 at 10:46pm by miss_hello_kitty

lmfao!! def. my new favorite xD

#308 - On 06/10/2009 at 5:16am by Soliee

Your mom is so awesome lol!

#309 - On 06/12/2009 at 8:46am by ImJustMe81406

LMAO! That is hilarious! She better have worn gloves when handling your missus!

#310 - On 06/12/2009 at 10:59am by LocoChaz006

AWESOME!!!

#311 - On 06/15/2009 at 7:55pm by Makinitez

At least she helped make it look good

#312 - On 06/15/2009 at 8:03pm by Skifreak44

Hahha woah I'd be embaressed to see her after that!

#313 - On 06/17/2009 at 8:07am by XAAMX

Wow. This just became my favorite FML! That's hilarious. Sorry man, I do feel for you.

#315 - On 06/20/2009 at 3:16pm by Lyrad

Who the fuck uses a fucking sock? YDI...

also lol @ all the comments saying "your mom rocks"

#317 - On 06/26/2009 at 3:25pm by ArmyOfOne

lmao xDDD
wow

#318 - On 06/28/2009 at 3:22am by SinfulRose

lmfao!

#319 - On 06/28/2009 at 10:00pm by katey_baybee

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

#320 - On 07/01/2009 at 10:45am by dontpanic

Your mum is beyond awesome.

#323 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:18pm by cheesefest

Wow Owned By Your Mum,,

Harsh,

Epic Fucking Win For Your Mum Though

#324 - On 07/05/2009 at 11:22am by 3991119O

wow...thats not akward at all! LOL

#325 - On 07/06/2009 at 1:40pm by Bjosh1003

man dont worry about it my mums a complete bitch to me aswell its just part of our shitty fucking lives
i had a girlfriend untill a couple of hours ago she dumped me over msn . what a fucking dick
dw there a waste of fucking time

#326 - On 07/07/2009 at 7:21pm by ellomatt

Haha, someone's bitter!

#346 - On 11/07/2009 at 9:21pm by Fentown

lmfao I'm so sorry, but this is just to funny! I'm really sorry love. Your mom is awesome lol. but I'm pretty sure you can get a girl. or guy. XD Mom's are just bitches wish i knew mine. lol not! :D

AshleyAutopsy

#327 - On 07/14/2009 at 1:44pm by AshleyAutopsy

LMAO, I am sorry but that is hilarious. Sounds like something my best friend would do. And I am sure you can find a girl. ^_^

#328 - On 07/16/2009 at 8:07pm by KelsyKatastrophe

This is the funniest one ever!
Bwahahahahaha!

#329 - On 07/23/2009 at 6:25pm by sevenyearnight

brilliant FML, your mother sounds HILARIOUS

#330 - On 07/27/2009 at 3:10pm by larazza

lololol, this made me laugh so much, can your mum be my new best friend? she's awesome as.

#331 - On 08/05/2009 at 9:09am by nessah_x

omg I live in oregon. 0_o

#332 - On 08/08/2009 at 9:19am by kisses_4_moi

Me too, lol.

#334 - On 08/12/2009 at 7:33pm by redbluegreen

This comment has been moderated.

#333 - On 08/08/2009 at 11:15pm by lampshade131

Your Mom = WIN!

#335 - On 08/20/2009 at 12:28pm by Bullshet

OHHHHHH BURN!!!!!

#336 - On 08/28/2009 at 12:58am by tone_lokia

Right, Mom mocks her son, and is declared awesome.

#337 - On 09/27/2009 at 12:26am by raymm

Your mom is hilarious!

#338 - On 10/09/2009 at 1:20am by im2strongtobreak

holyy fuck dude!

#340 - On 10/23/2009 at 7:32am by neilbuster

your mom has got great sense of humour u should thank her definitely..

#342 - On 10/31/2009 at 8:11pm by tutikushi

WHY THE EFFING HELL DID YOUR MOM TOUCH THAT SOCK? shes as disgusting as you for jerking off into something u wear on ur feet. find a pooter and use it, its really not hard, just lower ur standards. tell ur mom to get a life too, touching ur socks is literally filthy

#343 - On 11/01/2009 at 7:48am by Bongobongo

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You mom is freaking awesome. xDDD

#344 - On 11/02/2009 at 7:35pm by teuscherchoklit

That's hilarious! Embarrassing...but HILARIOUS! I'm SO doing this to my kids! :)

#345 - On 11/05/2009 at 12:37pm by Destroy_Me

Did she draw lips around the sock's opening?

#347 - On 11/17/2009 at 2:47am by SeeBrendenBurn

Hilarious! haha

#348 - On 11/17/2009 at 11:54am by JustAnotherTina

Kay seriously? Using a sock? Just go to a strip club and ask any girl there to go home with you for the night. It can be a one night stand but it would be worth it.

#349 - On 11/17/2009 at 9:41pm by loveyahun

Some people don't want to get STD's, or, God forbid, they want to lose their virginity to someone they actually have feelings for.

#351 - On 11/28/2009 at 7:03pm by equinoxe

your mother ROCKS ^__^... I'm also offended... a sock feels like our pussy?? noooooo lol n if you happen to screw someone that does feel like a sock use condoms n get tested... ewww... not judgeing the whole masturbating part cuz I do it quite frequently... ^__^

#350 - On 11/22/2009 at 6:09am by Hurt16

Your mom is gross for touching that sock..

#352 - On 12/01/2009 at 10:09pm by Kiranez

lol
mom......WIN
dude no joke your mom is awesome and
wtf @ a sock?

#353 - On 12/03/2009 at 9:43pm by Krish_na

well, discovering this months later, I have to say that was utterly hilarious.

#354 - On 12/08/2009 at 8:20am by sarcdude

:/ Your mom thought you could do better, so she fixed your sock for you. XD

#355 - On 12/08/2009 at 1:39pm by THIS_IS_Phoenix

What an epic mum!

#356 - On 12/13/2009 at 10:13am by GeneGenie

bahahahahaha!

#357 - On 12/30/2009 at 3:41am by SimplySweetness

Why the hell would you use a sock? I don't get it.
That's hilarious on your mom's part though. Rofl.
And terribly embarrassing for you, sorry 'bout that.

#358 - On 01/04/2010 at 1:26am by SparksLikeFlint

lol sucks for you.

#359 - On 01/09/2010 at 12:10am by 5oforlife

I'm confused why so many people don't understand a guy dumping his load into the sock. I'm a chick and I thought this was a common occurrence before I ever had a boyfriend and my current boyfriend has told me he has done it. I don't see the big deal.

#360 - On 01/13/2010 at 5:47am by DarkJoy

This comment has been moderated.

#361 - On 01/15/2010 at 3:06pm by falsifying

lmfao priceless damn yerr mom is so hard for that lmfao

#362 - On 01/30/2010 at 10:31pm by DamnDaddy

Looks like you need to find another sock to use :D

#363 - On 02/01/2010 at 6:49pm by supergamer94

Jack off with it and give it to your mom and say "wanna meet my girlfriend?" I swear to god thats what I would do.

#364 - On 02/02/2010 at 9:05pm by mynameismclovin

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